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May Jokes for Teachers
June Jokes for Teachers
July Jokes for Teachers
- Teacher: Where was the Declaration of Independence signed? Student: At the bottom. (American Revolution Jokes)
- Teacher: OK, was the Declaration of Independence written in Philadelphia? Student: No, it was written in ink. (Jokes for Teachers & Pennsylvania Jokes)
- February 29th: We should have February 29th every year?…Statistically it’s the day the fewest people die so why only have it 1/4 of the time? (Math Jokes for Teachers)
November Jokes for Teachers
December Jokes for Teachers
- Winter Jokes for Teachers: What does Jack Frost like best about school?… Snow and tell. (Winter Jokes & 180 School Jokes)
- December 25th: Christmas Jokes for Teachers: What do call a middle school student afraid of Santa Claus?….Claustrophobic. (Middle School Jokes)
- December 31st: Top 10 New Year’s Eve Jokes for Teachers: “I promise not to make any bad jokes for the rest of the year.” A high school teacher on the last day before Winter Break. (Dad Jokes & High School Jokes)
January Jokes for Teachers
- “I promise not to make any bad jokes for the rest of the year.” A teacher on the last day before Winter Break.
- Why did the New England teacher go for a swim at the Polar Plunge on New Year’s Day?… She wanted to test the water. (Swimming Jokes)
- Why did the New England teacher go for a swim at the Polar Plunge on New Year’s Day?… He wanted to test the water and also give the 1st test of the year! (Swimming Jokes)
- What did the triple jumper say to the high school track & field team on January 1st?… Hoppy New Year (365 Sports Jokes & Track & Field Jokes)
- What comes at the start of January?… “J.”
- January 4th: National Spaghetti Day Jokes Top 10 Spaghetti Jokes: Why did the spaghetti miss the field trip?… It lost its parmesan slip. (Jokes for Teachers)
- January 5th: National Bird Day Top 10 Bird Jokes: What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?… Owlgebra! (Pi Day Jokes & Algebra Jokes for Teachers)
- Where did the spaghetti go to dance?… The meat ball! (Meatball Jokes)
- Help Wanted: Gymnastics Teacher Needed To Work Sat-Wed. Must be flexible. (Top Jobs for Teachers & Gymnastics Jokes)
- Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?… So he could grade his eggs. (180 School Jokes)
- Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?… Because he was caught tweeting on a test. (365 School Jokes)
- Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?… He got caught peeping on a test. (365 School Jokes & 180 School Jokes)
- January 11th National Milk Day: Top 10 Milk Jokes: What did one dairy cow say to another?… Got milk? (Cow Jokes)
- What did the triple jumper say to the middle school track & field team on January 1st?… Hoppy New Year (365 Sports Jokes & Track & Field Jokes)
- January 11th Milk Day: What is a cow’s favorite type of math?… Moo-tiplication (Pi Day Jokes & Math Jokes for Teachers)
- What are a cows favorite subjects in school?… Moosic, psycowolgy, cowculus (365 School Jokes)
- Why did the chicken cross the playground?… To get to the other slide!
- Hat Day: One good thing about graduation is that you get to wear a funny hat that makes your brain look larger than it actually is. (Graduation Jokes)
- January 18th: Winnie the Pooh Jokes What does Winnie say when he sneezes?… Ahh-ahh-POOH!!!
- January 19th: National Popcorn Day Jokes & Popcorn Jokes
- National Croissant Day: When I was a kid, my parents would always say “Excuse my french” after a swear word… I’ll never forget that first day at school when the teacher asked did we know any French. (Croissant Jokes)
February Jokes for Teachers
- I asked my students if I could make my own Valentines. They tore my valentines in half!” the teacher said half-heartedly. (Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes)
- A first-grade teacher can’t believe her student isn’t hyped up about the Super Bowl. “It’s a huge event. Why aren’t you excited?” “Because I’m not a football fan. My parents love basketball, so I do too,” says the student. “Well, that’s a lousy reason,” says the teacher. “What if your parents were morons? What would you be then?” “Then I’d be a football fan.” (Jokes for Teachers & Basketball Jokes)
- What’s the difference between a Super Bowl quarterback and an elementary student?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap. (Elementary School Jokes & Super Bowl Jokes)
- What’s the difference between a Super Bowl quarterback and a kindergarten student?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap. (Kindergarten Jokes & Super Bowl Jokes)
March Jokes for Teachers
- What do you call someone who watches you take a test while wearing a vest?… Proctor Seuss. (Jokes for Teachers)
- What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite school subject?… HISStory. (Cat Jokes & Social Studies Jokes)
- National Grammar Day Jokes: I once fell in love with someone who only knew 4 vowels. They didn’t know I existed. (Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes)
- March 4th: What did the teacher say to the students when they lined up to leave school?… March 4th! (Memorial Day Jokes & Veterans’ Day Jokes)
- What grade did the Cat in the Hat get on his math test?… A Purrrr-fect score! (Math Jokes for Kids & Cat Jokes)
- Student: Can I go to the bathroom? Teacher: It’s may. Student: No, it’s March! (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
- What is the difference between a comma and the Cat in the Hat?… One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause. (Grammar Jokes & Cat Jokes)
- Pi Day…. Come to think of it, we wouldn’t mind celebrating forever.
- Don’t let advanced math intimidate you! It’s as easy as pi!
- What is the official animal of Pi Day?… The pi-thon. (Snake Jokes)
- What is a math teacher’s favorite dessert?… Pi! (Pie Jokes & Math Jokes for Teachers)
- If March 14th is really Pi Day… it will never end.
- Apologies, but most of these pi jokes are about being irrational.
- March 14th: Daylight Savings Time: Why did the veteran teacher nearing retiring throw the clock out the window?… She wanted to see time fly!
- March 14th Pi Day Jokes for Teachers: Statistics show that 3.14 percent of sailors are pi-rates. (Pirate Jokes)
- How did the Grinch know to average all of the presents he stole, so that each Who in Whoville got the same amount returned to them?… He’s a mean one, Mr. Grinch. (Math Jokes for Kids)
- March 17th St. Patrick’s Day Jokes for Teachers: Knock Knock …. Who’s there? ….Irish!… Irish Who? …. Irish you a happy St. Patrick’s Day!
- Teacher #1: My new student is from Ireland. Teacher #2: Oh, really? …. Teacher #1: No, O’Reilly!
- Did you know my math teacher is from Ireland?… He is “Pi” – rish! (Pi Day Jokes for Teachers)
- Why do teachers wear shamrocks on St. Patrick’s Day? …. Regular rocks are too heavy.
- Why are leprechauns bad teachers?…. Because they’re very short-tempered!
- Knock Knock …. Who’s there? ….Irish!… Irish Who? …. Irish you were a better student.
- Are people jealous of the Irish high school teachers?… Sure, they’re green with envy! (High School Jokes)
- Are people jealous of the Irish students?… Sure, they’re green with envy!
- Why can’t you borrow lunch money from a leprechaun? …. Because they’re always a little short. (Leprechaun Jokes)
- How can you tell if an Irish teacher is having a good time? …. He’s Dublin over with laughter! (World Geography Jokes)
- How can you tell if an Irish principal is having a good time? …. He’s Dublin over with laughter! (World Geography Jokes)
- “My principal is an Irishman.” ….”Oh, really?” …. “No, O’Reilly!” (Principal Jokes)
- Elementary School Motto: Keep calm, Crayon. (Jokes for Teachers)
- March 30th National Pencil Day: If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why isn’t it #1? (Pencil Jokes)
- March 31st: Top 10 Crayon Jokes: Why do nurses carry red crayons to work?… In case they has to draw blood.
April Jokes for Teachers
- April 1st: April Fools’ Day Jokes for Teachers: Student: Do you know all about April 1st? Teacher: Yes, I’m fooly aware of it!
- Why are teachers and students so tired on April 1?…. Because they’ve just finished a long, 31 day March!
- I think my calendar is broken…Haha, April Fools! It works just fine. (April Fool’s Day Jokes)
- Why does an elementary school teacher feel sorry for students who eat crayons…. They dye inside a little. (Crayon Jokes)
- I hated eating my greens in school when I was a kid… They always tasted worse than the other crayons! (Crayon Jokes)