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May Jokes for Teachers

June Jokes for Teachers

July Jokes for Teachers

  1. Teacher: Where was the Declaration of Independence signed? Student: At the bottom. (American Revolution Jokes)
  2. Teacher: OK, was the Declaration of Independence written in Philadelphia? Student: No, it was written in ink. (Jokes for Teachers & Pennsylvania Jokes)
  3. February 29th: We should have February 29th every year?…Statistically it’s the day the fewest people die so why only have it 1/4 of the time? (Math Jokes for Teachers)

November Jokes for Teachers

December Jokes for Teachers

  1. Winter Jokes for Teachers: What does Jack Frost like best about school?… Snow and tell. (Winter Jokes & 180 School Jokes)
  2. December 25th: Christmas Jokes for Teachers: What do call a middle school student afraid of Santa Claus?….Claustrophobic. (Middle School Jokes)
  3. December 31st: Top 10 New Year’s Eve Jokes for Teachers: “I promise not to make any bad jokes for the rest of the year.” A high school teacher on the last day before Winter Break. (Dad Jokes & High School Jokes)

January Jokes for Teachers

  1. “I promise not to make any bad jokes for the rest of the year.” A teacher on the last day before Winter Break.
  2. Why did the New England teacher go for a swim at the Polar Plunge on New Year’s Day?… She wanted to test the water. (Swimming Jokes)
  3. Why did the New England teacher go for a swim at the Polar Plunge on New Year’s Day?… He wanted to test the water and also give the 1st test of the year! (Swimming Jokes)
  4. What did the triple jumper say to the high school track & field team on January 1st?… Hoppy New Year (365 Sports Jokes & Track & Field Jokes)
  5. What comes at the start of January?… “J.”
  6. January 4th: National Spaghetti Day Jokes Top 10 Spaghetti Jokes: Why did the spaghetti miss the field trip?… It lost its parmesan slip. (Jokes for Teachers)
  7. January 5th: National Bird Day Top 10 Bird JokesWhat kind of math do Snowy Owls like?… Owlgebra! (Pi Day Jokes & Algebra Jokes for Teachers)
  8. Where did the spaghetti go to dance?… The meat ball! (Meatball Jokes)
  9. Help Wanted: Gymnastics Teacher Needed To Work Sat-Wed. Must be flexible. (Top Jobs for Teachers & Gymnastics Jokes)
  10. Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?… So he could grade his eggs. (180 School Jokes)
  11. Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?… Because he was caught tweeting on a test. (365 School Jokes)
  12. Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?… He got caught peeping on a test. (365 School Jokes & 180 School Jokes)
  13. January 11th National Milk Day: Top 10 Milk JokesWhat did one dairy cow say to another?… Got milk? (Cow Jokes)
  14. What did the triple jumper say to the middle school track & field team on January 1st?… Hoppy New Year (365 Sports Jokes & Track & Field Jokes)
  15. January 11th Milk Day: What is a cow’s favorite type of math?… Moo-tiplication (Pi Day Jokes & Math Jokes for Teachers)
  16. What are a cows favorite subjects in school?… Moosic, psycowolgy, cowculus (365 School Jokes)
  17. Why did the chicken cross the playground?… To get to the other slide!
  18. Hat Day: One good thing about graduation is that you get to wear a funny hat that makes your brain look larger than it actually is. (Graduation Jokes)
  19. January 18th: Winnie the Pooh Jokes What does Winnie say when he sneezes?… Ahh-ahh-POOH!!!
  20. January 19th: National Popcorn Day Jokes & Popcorn Jokes
  21. National Croissant Day: When I was a kid, my parents would always say “Excuse my french” after a swear word… I’ll never forget that first day at school when the teacher asked did we know any French. (Croissant Jokes)

February Jokes for Teachers

  1. I asked my students if I could make my own Valentines. They tore my valentines in half!” the teacher said half-heartedly. (Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes)
  2. A first-grade teacher can’t believe her student isn’t hyped up about the Super Bowl. “It’s a huge event. Why aren’t you excited?” “Because I’m not a football fan. My parents love basketball, so I do too,” says the student. “Well, that’s a lousy reason,” says the teacher. “What if your parents were morons? What would you be then?” “Then I’d be a football fan.” (Jokes for Teachers & Basketball Jokes)
  3. What’s the difference between a Super Bowl quarterback and an elementary student?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap. (Elementary School Jokes & Super Bowl Jokes)
  4. What’s the difference between a Super Bowl quarterback and a kindergarten student?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap. (Kindergarten Jokes & Super Bowl Jokes)

March Jokes for Teachers

  1. What do you call someone who watches you take a test while wearing a vest?… Proctor Seuss. (Jokes for Teachers)
  2. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite school subject?… HISStory. (Cat Jokes & Social Studies Jokes)
  3. National Grammar Day Jokes: I once fell in love with someone who only knew 4 vowels. They didn’t know I existed. (Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes)
  4. March 4th: What did the teacher say to the students when they lined up to leave school?… March 4th! (Memorial Day Jokes & Veterans’ Day Jokes)
  5. What grade did the Cat in the Hat get on his math test?… A Purrrr-fect score! (Math Jokes for Kids & Cat Jokes)
  6. Student: Can I go to the bathroom? Teacher: It’s may. Student: No, it’s March! (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
  7. What is the difference between a comma and the Cat in the Hat?… One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause. (Grammar Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  8. Pi Day…. Come to think of it, we wouldn’t mind celebrating forever.
  9. Don’t let advanced math intimidate you! It’s as easy as pi!
  10. What is the official animal of Pi Day?… The pi-thon. (Snake Jokes)
  11. What is a math teacher’s favorite dessert?… Pi! (Pie Jokes & Math Jokes for Teachers)
  12. If March 14th is really Pi Day… it will never end.
  13. Apologies, but most of these pi jokes are about being irrational.
  14. March 14th: Daylight Savings Time: Why did the veteran teacher nearing retiring throw the clock out the window?… She wanted to see time fly!
  15. March 14th Pi Day Jokes for Teachers: Statistics show that 3.14 percent of sailors are pi-rates. (Pirate Jokes)
  16. How did the Grinch know to average all of the presents he stole, so that each Who in Whoville got the same amount returned to them?… He’s a mean one, Mr. Grinch. (Math Jokes for Kids)
  17. March 17th St. Patrick’s Day Jokes for Teachers: Knock Knock …. Who’s there? ….Irish!… Irish Who? …. Irish you a happy St. Patrick’s Day!
  18. Teacher #1: My new student is from Ireland. Teacher #2: Oh, really? …. Teacher #1: No, O’Reilly!
  19. Did you know my math teacher is from Ireland?… He is “Pi” – rish! (Pi Day Jokes for Teachers)
  20. Why do teachers wear shamrocks on St. Patrick’s Day? …. Regular rocks are too heavy.
  21. Why are leprechauns bad teachers?…. Because they’re very short-tempered!
  22. Knock Knock …. Who’s there? ….Irish!… Irish Who? …. Irish you were a better student.
  23. Are people jealous of the Irish high school teachers?… Sure, they’re green with envy! (High School Jokes)
  24. Are people jealous of the Irish students?… Sure, they’re green with envy!
  25. Why can’t you borrow lunch money from a leprechaun? …. Because they’re always a little short. (Leprechaun Jokes)
  26. How can you tell if an Irish teacher is having a good time? …. He’s Dublin over with laughter! (World Geography Jokes)
  27. How can you tell if an Irish principal is having a good time? …. He’s Dublin over with laughter! (World Geography Jokes)
  28. “My principal is an Irishman.” ….”Oh, really?” …. “No, O’Reilly!” (Principal Jokes)
  29. Elementary School Motto: Keep calm, Crayon. (Jokes for Teachers)
  30. March 30th National Pencil Day: If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why isn’t it #1? (Pencil Jokes)
  31. March 31st: Top 10 Crayon Jokes: Why do nurses carry red crayons to work?… In case they has to draw blood.

April Jokes for Teachers

  1. April 1st: April Fools’ Day Jokes for Teachers: Student: Do you know all about April 1st? Teacher: Yes, I’m fooly aware of it!
  2. Why are teachers and students so tired on April 1?…. Because they’ve just finished a long, 31 day March! 
  3. I think my calendar is broken…Haha, April Fools! It works just fine. (April Fool’s Day Jokes)
  4. Why does an elementary school teacher feel sorry for students who eat crayons…. They dye inside a little. (Crayon Jokes)
  5. I hated eating my greens in school when I was a kid… They always tasted worse than the other crayons! (Crayon Jokes)