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Top Joke Pages:
- Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best pencil jokes.
- If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why isn’t it #1? (Jokes for Teachers)
- Did you hear about the notebook who married the pencil?… She finally found Mr. Write. (Marriage Jokes)
- I show up at the beginning of each school year with a full pencil box and an empty head. (Back to School Jokes)
- The best wood in most golfer’s bags is the pencil. (Golf Jokes)
- What did the paper say to the pencil?… Write on! (Grammar Jokes)
- How do pencils exercise?… Stationary Bike. (Bike Jokes)
- I threw a pencil yesterday… I suppose you could say it wasn’t stationary anymore.
- What is a pencil’s favorite sport?… Diving (the pencil dive)! (Swimming Jokes)
- A pencil isn’t my favorite writing tool… …but it’s a solid number 2.
- Why is the eraser sold separately from the pencil?… Because you have to pay for your mistakes.
- I finally hung up all of my pencil drawings… But it makes my house look kinda sketchy…
- Did you hear the joke about broken pencil?… probably not, it is pointless.
- What did the pencil say to the paper?… I dot my i’s on you! (Valentine’s Day Jokes)
- What did the pencil sharpener say to the pencil?… Stop going in circles and get to the point! (Geometry Jokes for Teachers)
- If you roll a pencil down a hill… is it still stationary?
- I want to design a pencil with an eraser on both ends… People say it’s pointless though.
- I got a job as a pencil sharpener… I would tell you about it but you wouldn’t get the point. (Labor Day Jokes)
- My friends are getting tire of me always talking about sharpening my pencil… but really, I’m just trying to make a point.
- Why did the basketball player bring colored pencils s to the Final Four?… He wanted to draw fouls. (Final Four Jokes)
- Where do vampires get their pencils?… Pencilvania!
- Which colored pencil is the sharpest?… Red, because it can draw blood.
- What did the pencil say to the sharpener?… Without you, my life would be pointless.
- What’s the difference between communism and a pencil?… The pencil works on things other than paper.
- Why do influencers always carry a pencil?… To draw attention.
- Today I wanted to make a broken pencil pun… But there’s no point.
- I’ve decided to marry a pencil… I can’t wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B.
- A pencil and a scissors are having a debate… Everytime the pencil make a good point, the scissors get a little snippy.
- How does a pencil hire their workers?… He appoints them. (Labor Day Jokes)
- Why did the pencil get a speeding ticket?… He had a lead foot! (Car Jokes)
- What did the gunfighter say to the pencil?… Draw!
- I need a pencil sharpener… Just to put it bluntly.
- When can’t a pencil write out a check?… When it’s broke.
- What did one pencil say to the other pencil?… You’re looking sharp. (Middle School Jokes)
- What did the math book tell the pencil?…. I have a lot of problems. (Elementary Math Jokes)
- Why do Grizzlies break their pencils?… They BEAR down too heard! (Bear Jokes )
- My grandparents buy me so many school supplies for the first day of school that I have to take the first two weeks off just to sharpen pencils. (Grandparent Jokes & Back to School Jokes)
- Where did the pen go for holiday?… He went to pencil-vania. (Pennsylvania Jokes)
- Which colored pencil is the sharpest?… Red, because it can draw blood.
- I was rejected from my dream art school because I used the wrong pencil… It wasn’t 2B.
- Have you read the article about broken pencils?… The reviewers said it’s pointless and lead on for too long.
- I’m having a hard time trying to decide on which pencil to use for my English literature exam… 2B or not 2B – that is the question.
- What did one pencil say to the other pencil before the prom?… You’re looking sharp. (Middle School Jokes)
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… A broken pencil… A broken pencil who?… Oh never mind it’s pointless.
- A man showed up for a duel armed only with a pencil and paper… He then proceeded to draw his weapon.
- I just lost an argument with a pencil… To be fair, it had a point.
- Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil?… Because it has no point!
- What did the pen say to the pencil?… So, what’s your point!
- Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil?… Because it is pointless.
- I made a pencil with two erasers… It was pointless.
- What did the middle school math book tell the #2 pencil?….I have a lot of problems. (Math Jokes & Pi Day Jokes)
- Why do influencers always carry a pencil?… To draw attention. (Art Jokes)
- Why was the pencil brought in for questioning… Because they thought he was sketchy. (Police Jokes)
- Why don’t pens and pencils walk around?… Because they’re stationary
- Why did the basketball player bring pencils to the basketball game?… He wanted to draw fouls. (Final Four Jokes)
- You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead. (Horse Jokes)
- My mom hung up all of my pencil drawings…. it kinda makes my house look sketchy. (Art Jokes & Mom Jokes)
- Why did the eraser on the end of the pencil feel like giving up?… Because it couldn’t see the point.
- People that use pencils to draw… They’re sketchy.
- I refuse to use a pencil and a ruler on anything but paper… that’s where I draw the line.
- Why don’t paper, pens. and pencils walk around?… Because they’re stationary.
- Why was the pencil brought in for questioning… Because they thought he was sketchy
- Why aren’t there more pencil fights?… Last time it lead to a draw!
- Why was the pencil lumbering?… It’s feet were full of lead.
- What do you call two pencils fighting?… A grafight.
- Did you hear about the notebook who married the pencil?… He finally found Mr. Write. (Marriage Jokes)
- Why did the pencil become a philosopher?… It always had a point.
- Pencils can be really sharp, but they are still allowed on planes. That’s because… they needed to draw the line somewhere.
- If you were anti-pencil… Would you be erasist?
- Did you hear about the man who got depressed after he lost his favorite pencil sharpener?… Everything seemed pointless!
- A pencil isn’t John Wick’s primary murder weapon… But it’s definitely number 2.
- What did the detective pencil do well?… Traced people, always on the lookout for leads.
- How does a pencil express love?… I like you. What do you ink?
- What do pencils shave?… To look sharp.
- Why was the pencil always honest?… It wanted to do the write thing.
- How do pencils relax after work?…They draw the curtains.
- Why did Shakespeare only write in ink?… Pencils posed an issue; 2B or not 2B
- I was going to try to post a joke about sharpening pencils in the dark… But I couldn’t see the point.
- Why did the pencil start a band?… To make some sharp music.
- What did the pencil say about its job?… I’m really drawn to it.
- How do pencils throw a party?… They draw a big crowd.
- So I used a blunt pencil yesterday… It was pointless.
- How did the pencil make a point in the meeting?… It drew everyone’s attention.
- What did the pencil say to the pen during an argument?… You’re crossing the line!
- How did the pencil handle criticism?… It drew strength from it.
- Why don’t blind people sharpen pencils?… They don’t see the point.
- I own a pencil that used to be owned by William Shakespeare, but he chewed it a lot… Now I can’t tell if it’s 2B or not 2B.
- My wife has been penciling in her eyebrows lately… I think that she draws them a little high, so I told her… She just looked at me surprised.
- I have the IQ of a pencil without an eraser… I create problems and make someone else clean them up.
- What’s the biggest problem while buying a pencil?… 2B or not 2B.
- What do you call a pencil sharpener that can’t sharpen pencils?… Broken
- What do you call a pencil you’ve just thrown out the window?… I don’t know. But it’s certainly not stationary.
- I have a hard time trusting people that use pencils to draw… They’re sketchy.
- A pencil walks into a bar The bartender says, “We don’t serve your type here.” The pencil yells back “Erasist!”
- When it comes to sharpening pencils… there’s never a dull moment.
- One of Shakespeare’s original pencils is going up for auction… Problem is its very chewed, so nobody can tell if its 2b or not 2b.
- I failed my Shakespeare test because I forgot to study and I used the wrong pencil… I couldn’t tell whether it was 2B or not 2B.
- Have you read the article about broken pencils? I hope not, the reviewers said it’s pointless and lead on for too long.
- I was going to sharpen my pencil to take my test on nihilism.. But there was no point
- Someone stole all the pencils at the police station… Detectives have no leads.
- Why did the pencil stink?… because it was a No. 2.
- A pencil isn’t as phallic as a pen is.