Google Search “Marriage Jokes”

(Marriage Jokes)

  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best marriage jokes.
  2. Two workers decided to get married right after Labor Day… The wedding guests said their union was beautiful. (Wedding Jokes)
  3. Why did the two dentists get married?… Because they were so enameled of each other. (Dentist Jokes)
  4. My wife who was a dentist passed away… I’ve loved and I’ve flossed. (Marriage Jokes & Cemetery Jokes)
  5. One of the earliest dates I went on with my wife was a blindfolded archery lesson. It wasn’t our first date… but was the one that stuck in my head. (Archery Jokes)
  6. My wife’s panties are labelled ‘Monday’, ‘Tuesday’, ‘Wednesday’ … My underwear is labelled ‘January’, February’, ‘March’… (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
  7. What do you call it when two chocolate chip cookies from the same sheet get married?… A batch made in heaven (Chocolate Chip Cookie Jokes)
  8. My wife asked me if I ate the ice cream she had in the freezer. I told her no… I ate it on the couch. (Ice Cream Jokes)
  9. The Lord of the Rings must be about marriage… Because when you put the ring on, you disappear. (Lord of the Rings Jokes)
  10. At a party, a young wife admonished her husband, “That’s the fourth time you’ve gone back for ice cream and cake. Doesn’t it embarrass you?” “Why should it?” answered her spouse. “I keep telling them it’s for you.”
  11. If Burger King married Dairy Queen where would they live?… At White Castle! (Cheeseburger Jokes for Kids & Marriage Jokes)
  12. Why should you never marry a badminton player?… Because love means nothing to them! (Badminton Jokes)
  13. What does the ice cream call his wife?… His one and cone-ly. (Ice Cream Jokes)
  14. What does the ice cream call her husband?… His one and cone-ly. (Ice Cream Jokes)
  15. After a long hard day my wife asked to cook her an Hawaiian pizza! She wasn’t to happy to see I’d burnt her dinner, after all I should’ve cooked it on aloha temperature!
  16. My wife is the biggest “Lord of the Rings” fan… Every night I hear her Tolkien in her sleep. (Napping Jokes & Marriage Jokes)
  17. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about marriage?
  18. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good marriage knock-knock joke?
  19. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good marriage knock knock jokes? (June Jokes Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
  20. The United States is a free country where every man can do as his wife pleases. (4th of July Jokes)
  21. Lord of Rings Life Lesson: Man puts ring on finger, slowly goes insane! (Wedding Jokes & 101 Lord of the Rings Jokes)
  22. Why did the Best Man go to Mount Doom?… Because he was the Ring-bearer! (Marriage Jokes & Wedding Jokes)
  23. Why is Obi-wan Kenobi a terrible marriage counselor?… The only advice he gives is Use di- vorce. (Divorce Jokes & Marriage Jokes)
  24. What is a bee’s favorite part of a relationship?… The Honeymoon period. (Valentine’s Day Jokes & Wedding Jokes)
  25. How do you propose to the queen bee?… With a Ru-Bee ring. (Wedding Jokes)
  26. Who protects the Queen Bee?… Her Hub-bee. (Valentine’s Day Jokes & Wedding Jokes)
  27. What did one bee say to the other?… I love bee-ing with you, honey! (Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes)
  28. Why didn’t any of Luke Skywalker’s marriages last?… He always followed Obi-Wan’s advice: “Use divorce, Luke.” (Marriage Jokes & Divorce Jokes)
  29. One ring rules your life, it slowly destroys you, and sometimes, death seems easier than continuing on. (Marriage Jokes & Wedding Jokes)
  30. Who did Saruman marry?… Saruwoman! (Wedding Jokes & Marriage Jokes)
  31. Why did the bee get married?… He found his honey. (Valentine’s Day Jokes & Wedding Jokes)
  32. A practical nurse is one who marries a rich, terminally ill patient. (Nurse Jokes)
  33. Hawaii Puns: Diamond Head is a girl’s best friend. (Hawaii Jokes)
  34. Hawaii Puns: I can’t wait to Maui you. (Hawaii Jokes & Wedding Jokes)
  35. What is the worst day to propose on?… April Fools’ Day! (April Jokes)
  36. You spend too much time thinking about golf! Do you even remember the day we got married?… Of course I do! It was the same day I sank that 45-foot putt.
  37. My wife woke up just now. She is dreaming and muttering about how she wrote the Lord of The Rings trilogy… She’s Tolkien in her sleep.
  38. I’ve been reading ‘Lord Of The Rings’ and apparently, Gollum was once a normal man, but wearing the ring drained him of his youth, energy and any joy in life… Must be the same ring I put on when I got married. (Wedding Jokes & Marriage Jokes)
  39. Who did Saruman get married to?… Sarugirl. (Wedding Jokes & Marriage Jokes)
  40. What did Galadriel say when Frodo offered her the Ring?… I do! (101 Lord of the Rings Jokes)
  41. If I remind my wife about Daylight Saving Time again… I think she might CLOCK me. (Daylight Savings Jokes)
  42. What was Frodo at Aragorn and Arwen’s wedding?… The Ring-bearer! (Lord of the Rings Jokes)
  43. Golfer’s Wife in disbelief: Were you really under the whole day? Husband: “Yes…under a tree…under a bush…and under the water,” (Marriage Jokes)
  44. “I married an Irishman on St. Patrick’s Day.” ….”Oh, really?” …. “No, O’Reilly!”
  45. 20 years ago I asked my high school love out to Prom, today I ask her to marry me… Both times she said no. (Wedding Jokes& Marriage Jokes)
  46. An Irish dad calls his son in London the day before Christmas Eve and says, “I hate to ruin your day but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing.” “Dad, what are you talking about?” the son screams. “We can’t stand the sight of each other any longer,” the father says. “We’re sick of each other and I’m sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Leeds and tell her.” The son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. “Like heck they’re getting divorced!” she shouts, “I’ll take care of this!” She calls Ireland immediately, and screams at her father, “You are NOT getting divorced. Don’t do a single thing until I get there. I’m calling my brother back, and we’ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?” and hangs up. The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. “Sorted! They’re coming for Christmas – and they’re paying their own way” (Marriage Jokes / Christmas Jokes / Divorce Jokes)
  47. What did the farmer give his wife for Valentines day?… Corn Rows. (Corn Jokes) 
  48. What did Avogadro give his ex-wife every month?… Alimoley. (Divorce Jokes & Marriage Jokes)
  49. My wife came home from work yesterday and was raging about her boss. She said to me, “I’m never going to work for that man again!.”  I asked her, “Why, what did he say to you?”  She said, “You’re fired.”  (Labor Day Jokes)
  50. What did Mr. and Mrs. Cheeseburger name their daughter?…. Patty. (Baby Jokes & Marriage Jokes)
  51. You spend too much time thinking about golf! Do you even remember the day we got married?… Of course I do! It was the same day I sank that 45-foot putt. (Wedding Jokes & Golf Jokes)
  52. What do some couples do during the first month of the year?… Get Janumarried. (January Jokes)
  53. Two golfers are ready to play on the 11th tee as a funeral cortege passes by. The first player stops, doffs his cap, and bows his head as the cortege passes. “That was a really nice thing to do,” the second golfer says. “It’s good to see there is still some respect in the world.” “Well, it’s only right,” the first golfer replies. “I was married to her for 35 years.” (Cemetery Jokes & Golf Jokes)
  54. A man once asked his friend the difference between a cyclone, a hurricane and a divorced wife…. Nothing! They all get the house. (Hurricane Jokes)
  55. If Burger King married Dairy Queen where would they live?… At White Castle! (Ice Cream Jokes for Kids & Cheeseburger Jokes)
  56. I bought my wife some mirrored sunglasses… I look great in them! (Sunglasses Jokes)