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Top Joke Pages: 180 School JokesFamily Joke of the DayMay Jokes for Kids, Funny Jokes for Kids, Funny Animal Jokes for Kids

(Vampire Jokes)

More Vampire Jokes… & Top 10 Halloween Jokes

October Jokes

  1. What do you get when you cross a skier and a vampire?… Frostbite. (Skiing Jokes)
  2. What is a vampire’s favorite book?… Wuthering Bites.
  3. Why did the vampire go to the library?… He wanted to sink his teeth into a really good book.
  4. I was recently asked who my favorite vampire was. I said, “the muppet from Sesame Street.” They told me, “He doesn’t count!” I replied, “I assure you, he does.” (Sesame Street Jokes)
  5. How do you kill a vampire from New Jersey?.. With a New York steak.
  6. How do you know if your boss is a vampire?… They hate sunlight and love to suck the life out of labor! 
  7. There’s only one vampire on Sesame Street… At least, only one that counts. (Math Jokes & Vampire Jokes)
  8. What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher?… Lots of blood tests! (Halloween Jokes for Teachers)
  9. What do you get when you cross Frosty the Snowman with a vampire?… Frostbite. (Vampire Jokes & Frosty the Snowman Jokes)
  10. Knock Knock!… Who’s there?… Fangs… Fangs who?… Fangs for the candy!
  11. What tests do middle school vampire teachers give?… Blood tests! (Middle School Jokes)
  12. What happens when two vampires meet at the school dance?… It was love at first bite! (Dracula Jokes & Vampire Jokes)
  13. Why didn’t Dracula have any friends at school?…He was a pain in the neck! (Dracula Jokes & Vampire Jokes)
  14. When do vampires like horse racing?…When it’s neck and neck! (Horse Racing Jokes & Vampire Jokes)
  15. Why didn’t Dracula have any friends?…He was a pain in the neck! (Biology Jokes for Kids & Vampire Jokes)
  16. Why did the little vampires stay up all night?… They were studying for a blood test. (Halloween Jokes & Back to School Jokes)
  17. What do vampires sing on New Year’s Eve?… Auld Fang Syne! (New Year’s Eve Jokes & Music Jokes)
  18. What is a vampire’s favorite drink?… A bloody Mary. (Halloween Jokes)
  19. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?… Frostbite. (Snowman Jokes)
  20. What is the name of Dracula’s new girlfriend?… Bloody Mary. (Valentine’s Day Jokes & Halloween Jokes)
  21. Where does a vampire keep his money?… In a blood bank. (Biology Jokes & Vampire Jokes)
  22. Which holiday is Dracula’s favorite?… Fangs-giving. (Vampire Jokes & Halloween Jokes)
  23. What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?…A nectarine. (Biology Jokes & Vampire Jokes)
  24. What kind of dog does a vampire have?… A bloodhound. (Biology Jokes & Dog Jokes)
  25. Do they really serve burgers in Transylvania?… Very rare-ly. (Hamburger Jokes)

Dear Jedi, Today is Friday the 13th, there’s never been a better time to join the Dark Side. (Star Wars Jokes)

What’s Jason Voorhees favorite bean?… A human bean. (Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)

What do Italian’s eat on Friday the 13th?… Fettucinni Afraid-o. (Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)

What song does Jason Voorhees sing on Friday the 13th?… “Takin Care of Business.” (Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)

Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the Friday the 13th dance?…Because he had no body to go with. (Halloween Jokes)

What pants do ghosts wear to the Friday the 13th dance?…BOO jeans. (Halloween Jokes & Ghost Jokes)

What key opens a Haunted House?… A spooKEY! (Halloween Jokes)

Why don’t Americans worry about Friday the 13th?… After losing their home, job, and 401k nothing scares them anymore! (Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)

What do evil spirits sing on Friday the 13th?… “Voorhees a jolly good fellow. Voorhees a jolly good fellow.” (Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)

What does a ghost keep in its stable?…Nightmares(Horse Racing Jokes)

When do vampires like horse racing?…When it’s neck and neck! (Horse Racing Jokes)

What do you call a skeleton that takes naps?… Sleepy bones! (Napping Jokes & Biology Jokes for Kids)

What do you call a skeleton that lies on its grave?… Lazy bones! (Biology Jokes for Kids & Cemetery Jokes)

Why can’t you tell a skeleton a secret?…Because it goes in one ear and out the other. (Biology Jokes)

How do you make a skeleton laugh?… Tickle its funnybone! (Biology Jokes)

What is a skeleton’s favorite drink?…Milk, it’s white and good for your bones. (Biology Jokes & Milk Jokes / Skeleton Jokes)

Who won the Halloween skeleton beauty contest?… No body. (Biology Jokes)

What did one casket say to the other casket?…”Is that you coffin?” (coughing).

What is a mummy’s favorite type of music?… Rap music. (Mothers’ Day Jokes & Music Jokes)

Why don’t skeletons play music in church?…They have no organs. (Biology Jokes)

What did one ghost say to the other ghost?… “Long time no see.” (Biology Jokes)

What did the mummy gymnastics coach say at the end of practice?… “Let’s wrap this up! (Gymnastics Jokes for Kids)

Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the prom / dance?… Because he had no body to go with. (Biology Jokes)

Why couldn’t the skeleton cross the road?…Because he didn’t have the guts. (Biology Jokes)

What would you get if you crossed a gymnast and the Invisible Man?… Gymnastics like no one has ever seen. (Gymnastics Jokes for Kids)

Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the Friday the 13th dance?…Because he had no body to go with. (Friday the 13th Jokes)

What’s the name of the scary movie about bacon?… Frankenswine. (Bacon Jokes)

What do skeletons say before they start to eat?… Bone appetite. (Biology Jokes)

What kind of boat do werewolves like?… blood vessels. (Biology Jokes)

How was Frankenstien’s birth?…Shocking. (Biology Jokes)

What do gymnasts who are good at bars dress up as for Halloween?… “GIANTS” (Gymnastics Jokes for Kids)

What kind of boat do werewolves and vampires like?… blood vessels.(Biology Jokes)

What did the werewolf eat after he’d had his teeth cleaned?…The dentist. (Biology Jokes & Dentist Jokes)

Why did the skeleton go scuba diving?…Because he wanted to get some muscles! (Top Geography Jokes & Biology Jokes)

What did the vampire gymnast say to the vault coach?… “I want to TSUK your blood.”(Gymnastics Jokes for Kids)

Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the dance?…Because he had no body to go with. (Biology Jokes)

Why did the skeleton stand in the corner during his prom?…Because he had no body to dance with! (Biology Jokes / Prom Jokes / High School Jokes)

What did the ghost teacher say to her class?…Watch the board and I’ll go through it again. (Ghost Jokes & Teacher Jokes)

Why is it hard for a ghost to tell a lie?… Because you can see right through him. (Ghost Jokes)

Who lives in the scary Hundred Acre Wood?… Winnie the Boo. (Winnie the Pooh Jokes & Ghost Jokes)
What pants do ghosts wear?… BOO jeans. (Ghost Jokes)

What do you call ghosts that ring doorbells?… Dead ringers. (Ghost Jokes)

Where do baby ghosts go when their mom goes to work?… Day scare! (Mothers’ Day Jokes & 365 Quotes for Mothers) (Ghost Jokes)

What does a ghost keep in its stable?… Nightmares. (Horse Racing Jokes & Top 10 Sports Jokes)

Where do movie stars go on Halloween?… MaliBOO!

What did the mummy ghost say to the noisy young ghost who kept interrupting?…”Spook when you’re spooken to.”  (Mothers’ Day Jokes & 365 Quotes for Mothers) (Ghost Jokes)

What pants do ghosts wear?… BOO jeans. (Ghost Jokes)

What does a ghost call his mom and dad?… His transparents. (Top 10 Mother’s Day Jokes Top Father’s Day Jokes / Top Father’s Day Quotes)(Ghost Jokes)

Where did the ghost go on vacation?… The BOO-hamas! (Geography Jokes & Travel Blogs)

What does a panda ghost eat?…. Bam-BOO!

What do ghosts serve for dessert?…I scream.

What is a ghost’s favorite ride?… A roller-ghoster. (Top Summer Jokes)

What kind of candy won’t a ghost touch?…Life Savers.

What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween?…Ghoul-aid! (Top Summer Jokes)

Where do you go when a ghost is chasing you?…To the living room!

How do ghosts like their eggs?…Terror-fried.

What happens when a ghost haunts a theater?…The actors get stage fright.