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More Halloween Jokes… & Top 10 Halloween Jokes

October Jokes

  1. The nurse walked into the busy doctor’s office and said, “Doctor, the invisible man is here.” The doctor replied, “Sorry, I can’t see him.” (Biology Jokes for Kids & Nurse Jokes)
  2. Why didn’t Dracula have any friends?…He was a pain in the neck! (Biology Jokes for Kids & Vampire Jokes)
  3. What did one ghost say to the other ghost?… “Long time no see.” (Biology Jokes)
  4. What did the werewolf eat after he’d had his teeth cleaned?… The dentist. (Biology Jokes & Dentist Jokes)
  5. What is a vampire’s favorite drink?… A bloody Mary. (Vampire Jokes)
  6. What did the ghost teacher say to her class?…Watch the board and I’ll go through it again. (Ghost Jokes & Teacher Jokes)
  7. What did the skeleton drive to the hockey game?… A Zam-bony. (Halloween Jokes for Kids / Top 10 Hockey Jokes / Skeleton Jokes)
  8. When Jason Voorhees tells a joke…. it kills! (Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)
  9. What did the ghost eat for lunch?… A booloney sandwich! (Ghost Jokes & Sandwich Jokes)
  10. Who won the zombie war?… Nobody, it was dead even. (Zombie jokes & Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)
  11. What is a skeleton’s favorite instrument?… The trombone. (Biology Jokes / Music Jokes / Skeleton Jokes)
  12. Why is it hard for a ghost to tell a lie?… Because you can see right through him. (Ghost Jokes)
  13. What does a ghost keep in its stable?…Nightmares(Horse Racing Jokes & Horse Jokes)
  14. What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?… A nectarine. (Biology Jokes & Vampire Jokes)
  15. What do you call a skeleton that takes naps?… Sleepy bones! (Napping Jokes & Biology Jokes for Kids)
  16. What do Italian’s eat on Friday the 13th?… Fettucinni Afraid-o. (Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)
  17. What key opens a Haunted House?… A spooKEY! (Halloween Jokes)
  18. What was Avogadro dressed as when he went to the masquerade ball / Halloween Costume Party?… an avocado. (Mole Day Jokes)
  19. What do you call a skeleton that lies on its grave?… Lazy bones! (Biology Jokes for Kids & Cemetery Jokes)
  20. Why can’t you tell a skeleton a secret?…Because it goes in one ear and out the other. (Biology Jokes)
  21. How do you make a skeleton laugh?… Tickle its funnybone! (Biology Jokes)
  22. What is a mummy’s favorite type of music?… Rap music. (Mothers’ Day Jokes & Music Jokes)
  23. Where does a vampire keep his money?… In a blood bank. (Biology Jokes & Vampire Jokes)
  24. What kind of dog does a vampire have?… A bloodhound. (Biology Jokes & Dog Jokes)
  25. What is the problem with two twin witches?… You never know which witch is which! (Biology Jokes & Witch Jokes)
  26. Why does Freddy Krueger wear a hat?… He ran out of scare spray. (Barber Jokes)
  27. What’s Jason Voorhees favorite bean?… A human bean. (Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)
  28. What do get when you cross Jason Voorhees and a box of cherrios?… A cereal killer. (Cereal Jokes)
  29. What do skeletons say before they start to eat?… Bone appetite. (Biology Jokes)
  30. What’s Jason Voorhees favorite dessert?… I-Scream! (Ice Cream Jokes & Summer Jokes)
  31. What kind of boat do werewolves like?… blood vessels. (Biology Jokes)
  32. What is the name of Dracula’s new girlfriend?… Bloody Mary. (Valentine’s Day Jokes & Vampire Jokes)
  33. What is a skeleton’s favorite drink?…Milk, it’s white and good for your bones. (Biology Jokes & Milk Jokes / Skeleton Jokes)
  34. Who won the Halloween skeleton beauty contest?… No body. (Biology Jokes)
  35. What did one casket say to the other casket?…”Is that you coffin?” (coughing).
  36. What do you get when you cross Columbus Day with Halloween?… Ghoulumbus Day. (Columbus Day Jokes)
  37. What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an evil spirit?… A poultrygeist! (Turkey Jokes)
  38. What did the mummy gymnastics coach say at the end of practice?… “Let’s wrap this up! (Gymnastics Jokes for Kids)
  39. Why don’t skeletons play music in church?…They have no organs. (Biology Jokes)
  40. What is a ghost’s favorite ride?… A roller-ghoster. (Top Summer Jokes)
  41. What Great Lake should you avoid on Friday the 13th?… Lake Erie. (Geography Jokes)
  42. Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the prom / dance?… Because he had no body to go with. (Biology Jokes / Prom Jokes)
  43. Where did the ghost go on vacation?… The BOO-hamas! (Geography Jokes & Travel Blogs)
  44. Who lives in the scary Hundred Acre Wood?… Winnie the Boo. (Winnie the Pooh Jokes & Ghost Jokes)
  45. Dear Jedi, Today is Friday the 13th, there’s never been a better time to join the Dark Side. (Star Wars Jokes)
  46. What’s the name of the scary movie about bacon?… Frankenswine. (Bacon Jokes)
  47. How was Frankenstien’s birth?…Shocking. (Biology Jokes)
  48. What song does Jason Voorhees sing on Friday the 13th?… “Takin Care of Business.” (Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)
  49. What pants do ghosts wear to the Friday the 13th dance?…BOO jeans. (Halloween Jokes & Ghost Jokes)
  50. What do evil spirits sing on Friday the 13th?… “Voorhees a jolly good fellow. Voorhees a jolly good fellow.” (Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)
  51. When do vampires like horse racing?…When it’s neck and neck! (Horse Racing Jokes)
  52. Why did the skeleton go scuba diving?…Because he wanted to get some muscles! (Geography Jokes & Biology Jokes)
  53. What pants do ghosts wear?… BOO jeans. (Ghost Jokes)
  54. Where do baby ghosts go when their mom goes to work?… Day scare! (Mothers’ Day Jokes / 365 Quotes for Mothers / Ghost Jokes)
  55. Where do movie stars go on Halloween?… MaliBOO! (Geography Jokes)
  56. What did the mummy ghost say to the noisy young ghost who kept interrupting?…”Spook when you’re spooken to.”  (Mothers’ Day Jokes & 365 Quotes for Mothers) (Ghost Jokes)
  57. What kind of candy won’t a ghost touch?…Life Savers. (Candy Jokes)
  58. What does a panda ghost eat?…. Bam-BOO!
  59. What do ghosts serve for dessert?…I scream.
  60. What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween?…Ghoul-aid! (Top Summer Jokes)
  61. Where do you go when a ghost is chasing you?…To the living room!
    How do ghosts like their eggs?…Terror-fried.
  62. What happens when a ghost haunts a theater?…The actors get stage fright.
  63. What do Thanksgiving and Halloween have in common?… One has gobblers, the other goblins. (Halloween Jokes)
  64. What do gymnasts who are good at bars dress up as for Halloween?… “GIANTS” (Gymnastics Jokes for Kids)
  65. What do you call ghosts that ring doorbells?… Dead ringers. (Ghost Jokes)
  66. Why couldn’t the skeleton cross the road?…Because he didn’t have the guts. (Biology Jokes)
  67. What would you get if you crossed a gymnast and the Invisible Man?… Gymnastics like no one has ever seen. (Gymnastics Jokes for Kids)
  68. Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the Friday the 13th dance?…Because he had no body to go with. (Friday the 13th Jokes)
  69. What kind of boat do werewolves and vampires like?… blood vessels.(Biology Jokes)
  70. What did the vampire gymnast say to the vault coach?… “I want to TSUK your blood.”(Gymnastics Jokes for Kids)
  71. Why don’t Americans worry about Friday the 13th?… After losing their home, job, and 401k nothing scares them anymore! (Top 10 Friday the 13th Jokes)
  72. Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the dance?…Because he had no body to go with. (Biology Jokes)
  73. What do you call an overweight pumpkin?…A plumpkin. (Pumpkin Jokes)
  74. Why did the skeleton stand in the corner during his prom?…Because he had no body to dance with! (Biology Jokes / Prom Jokes / High School Jokes)
  75. What does a ghost keep in its stable?… Nightmares. (Horse Racing Jokes & Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  76. What pants do ghosts wear?… BOO jeans. (Ghost Jokes)
  77. What does a ghost call his mom and dad?… His transparents. (Top 10 Mother’s Day Jokes Top Father’s Day Jokes / Top Father’s Day Quotes)(Ghost Jokes)

  78. What kind of streets do zombies live on?… Dead-ends.
  79. What do you call a mummy eating in bed?… A crummy mummy. (Mothers’ Day Jokes & Top Quotes for Mothers)
  80. When do vampires like horse racing?… When it’s neck and neck! (Horse Racing Jokes & Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  81. Who won the zombie war?… Nobody, it was dead even.
  82. What school subject is a witch good at?… Spelling. (Does Spelling REALLY matter?)
  83. How do you say goodbye to a vampire?… So long sucker!
  84. What kind of dog does a vampire have?… A bloodhound. (Dog Jokes)
  85. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?… Frostbite. (Holiday Jokes & Winter Jokes)
  86. What did the pumpkin need for its boo boo?… A pumpkin patch (Pumpkin Jokes)
  87. What key opens a Haunted House?… A spooKEY!
  88. Why don’t mummies take vacations?… They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind. (Mothers’ Day Jokes & 365 Quotes for Mothers)
  89. Why wasn’t there any food left after the monster party?… Because everyone was a goblin!
  90. What does a bird say at Halloween?…”Twick or tweet.” (Bird Jokes)
  91. Who did Dracula bring to the prom?… His ghoul friend. (Prom Jokes) (Prom Jokes & Back to School Jokes)
  92. What kind of mail does a celebrity vampire get?… Fang mail!
  93. What do you call a witch who likes the beach but is scared of the water?… A chicken sand witch.  (Geography Jokes & Travel Blogs)
  94. What did the skeleton order with his drink?… A mop.
  95. Why did the mummy get a headache?… Because he was GOBLIN his candy! (Mothers’ Day Jokes & 365 Quotes for Mothers)
  96. Who won the zombie war?… Nobody, it was dead even.
  97. Why did Dracula go to the library?… He wanted a good book to sink his teeth into! (Library Jokes)
  98. How do phantoms travel?… Ghost to ghost. (Ghost Jokes & Travel Blogs)
  99. What kind of TV do you find inside a haunted house?… A wide scream TV.
  100. What do you get when you cross a vampire with a mummy?… Either a flying bandage or a gift wrapped bat! (Mothers’ Day Jokes & 365 Quotes for Mothers)
  101. What school subject is a witch good at?… Spelling. (6 Lessons for the Letter of the Week A- Z & Elementary School Jokes)
  102. What do you call a witch at the beach?…A sand-witch. (Geography Jokes & Travel Blogs)
  103. Why did the vampire give up acting?…Because he couldn’t find a part he could sink his teeth into.
  104. Why was the skeleton scared to cross the road?…Because there was a dog on the other side. (Dog Jokes)
  105. What monster wears the most clothes?…A werewolf!
  106. How do you make a witch itch?…Take away her W. (26 Lessons for the Letter of the Week A- Z Top Elementary School Jokes)
  107. What did the ghost teacher say to her class?…”Watch the board and I’ll go through it again.” (180 School Jokes & Teacher Jokes)
  108. What is a witch’s favorite food?…Goulash.
  109. Why was the little ghost crying?…Because he wanted his mummy. (Mothers’ Day Jokes & 365 Quotes for Mothers) Ghost Jokes
  110. What did the jack-o’-lantern say to the other jack-o’-lantern when they were on their way to a Halloween party?…”Let’s get glowing.” (Pumpkin Jokes)
  111. What do you get when you cross a mummy with a vampire bat?… A flying Band-Aid.
  112. Why do witches fly around on broomsticks?…Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy!
  113. What do you do when you see a ghost?…Run away of course! (Track & Field Jokes & Top 10 Sports Jokes)
  114. Where does a vampire keep his money?… In a blood bank.
  115. What do you call a vampire 200 miles from a blood bank?…A cab.
  116. What do you call a mummy eating in bed?…A crummy mummy. (Mothers’ Day Jokes & 365 Quotes for Mothers)
  117. Why did the Cyclops close his school?…Because he only had one pupil. (180 School Jokes)
  118. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?…Frostbite. (Holiday Jokes & Winter Jokes)
  119. What do you call two witches who share a broom?…Broom mates.
  120. What do you call a nervous witch?… A twitch.
  121. Why are all Superman costumes tight?… They’re all size S. (Super Hero Jokes)
  122. Why don’t mummies take vacations?…They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind. (Mothers’ Day Jokes & 365 Quotes for Mothers)
  123. What song do vampires hate?…”You are my sunshine!” (Music Jokes)
  124. What did the little ghost say to his mom?…”I’ve got a boo boo.” (Mothers’ Day Jokes & 365 Quotes for Mothers) Ghost Jokes
  125. What do witches call for in a hotel room?… Broom service.
  126. What do you get if you cross a skeleton with a famous detective?… Sherlock Bones!
  127. I’m tall when I’m young, I’m short when I’m old, and every Halloween I stand up inside Jack O Lanterns. What am I?… A candle. (Pumpkin Jokes)