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More Library Jokes…

  1. Did you hear about the notebook who married the pencil?… She finally found Mr. Write. (Pencil Jokes & Marriage Jokes)
  2. Our school library is so quiet, when I’m sitting in there, I can hear my hair grow.
  3. Where does the library keep books about Big Foot?… The large-print section.
  4. Our school librarian is very strict. She’ll send you to the principal’s office for thinking too loudly. (Library Jokes & Principal Jokes)
  5. Why was the library so messy?… Because it was full of litter ature. (Library Jokes & Earth Day Jokes)
  6. How long did the baseball player spend in the library?… Five minutes. It was a short stop. (Baseball Jokes)
  7. What vegetables to librarians like?… Quiet peas. (Back to School Jokes)
  8. Why did the librarian take the day off on Labor Day?… She needed to book some time for herself.  (Labor Day Jokes)
  9. What do you do if pet starts eating your library book?… Take the words right out of their mouth.
  10. What is the school’s tallest room?… The library because it has the most stories. (Back to School Jokes)
  11. Why isn’t there a clock in the library?… Because it tocks too much. (Library Jokes)
  12. Which school building has the most stories?… The Library! (Library Jokes)
  13. What does one library book say to the other?… Can I take you out? (Book Jokes)
  14. What does a librarian take fishing?… Bookworms.
  15. Why did the librarian take Labor Day off?… She needed to book some fun into her schedule. (Labor Day Jokes)
  16. Why do librarians get married?… Because they are on the same page. (Marriage Jokes)
  17. I went to the library and asked where the self help section was. The librarian told me that if she told me where it was, that would defeat the purpose. (Book Jokes)
  18. I went into the local library and asked if they had any books on floor panels. “No” the librarian replied, “We keep them on shelves here.”
  19. Our school library is so quiet you can hear a pin drop and if it does… the pin will be sent to the principal’s office. (Library Jokes & Principal Jokes)
  20. Dewey go together?… I think so! (Book Jokes)
  21. I wanted to visit the local library… but it was overbooked. (Book Jokes)
  22. Why did the librarian take Labor Day off?… She needed to book some fun into her schedule. (Labor Day Jokes)
  23. Why did the detective go to the library?… He wanted to check out a mystery. (Police Jokes & Library Jokes)
  24. Librarian: Sorry I can’t hang out. My weekend is fully booked. (Book Jokes)
  25. I’ve decided to retire as a librarian… to start a new chapter in my life. (Retirement Jokes & Library Jokes)
  26. What did the librarian say to someone who checked out over 10 books?… Don’t overdue it. (Book Jokes)
  27. Why do librarians breakup?… Because they are not on the same page. (Book Jokes)
  28. Why do librarians get divorced?… Because they are not on the same page. (Divorce Jokes)
  29. How long did the baseball player spend in the library?… Five minutes. It was a short stop. (Baseball Jokes)
  30. What do librarians take with them when they go fishing?… Bookworms. (Fishing Jokes & Library Jokes)
  31. What reads and lives in an apple?… A bookworm. (Fall Jokes)
  32. Why did the volleyball players go to the library for practice?… The coach told them they’ll be doing some reading today. (Volleyball Jokes)
  33. Librarians know everything—they’re so resourceful. (Library Jokes)
  34. I haven’t been to the library in a while—how Dewey find the books? (Library Jokes)
  35. What vegetables to librarians like?… Quiet peas. (Back to School Jokes)
  36. How are you supposed to talk in the apple library?… With your incider voice. (Apple Jokes)
  37. Did you hear about the map of California that was mugged?… It was rolled by the map librarian. (Geography Jokes)
  38. Why did the librarian take the day off on Labor Day?… She needed to book some time for herself. 
  39. What is the school’s tallest room?… The library because it has the most stories. (Back to School Jokes)
  40. Why isn’t there a clock in the library?… Because it tocks too much.
  41. What do librarians hang over their babies’ cribs?… Bookmobiles.
  42. Which school building has the most stories?… The Library!
  43. Why was the library so tall?… Because it had a lot of stories!