Top Joke Pages:
- Top 10 Baseball Jokes
- World Series Jokes
- Top 10 Jokes & 101 Baseball Jokes
- Hot Dog Jokes
- 180 School Jokes
- Family Joke of the Day
- Sports Jokes for Kids
- (Baseball Jokes)
Every day we will try to share a little laughter with our Joke of the Day.
Here is our baseball edition. We hope you enjoy. We will try to tweet one joke per day!
- Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best baseball jokes.
- Which Major League baseball team does Avogadro support?… the Molewaukee Brewers (Baseball Jokes)
- Which team lost the World Series in 1982?… the Molewaukee Brewers (Baseball Jokes)
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about baseball?
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good baseball knock-knock joke?
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good baseball knock knock jokes? (June Jokes & Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
- Do you know who is considered the corniest professional base player of all time?… Ty Cobb. (Corn Jokes)
- What’s the difference between a baseball cupcake and a baseball muffin… The batter. (Baseball Jokes & Softball Jokes)
- Is There Baseball In Heaven? Two old men had been best friends for years, and they both live to their early 90’s, when one of them suddenly falls deathly ill. His friend comes to visit him on his deathbed, and they’re reminiscing about their long friendship, when the dying man’s friend asks, “Listen, when you die, do me a favor. I want to know if there’s baseball in heaven.” The dying man said, “We’ve been friends for years, this I’ll do for you.” And then he dies. A couple days later, his surviving friend is sleeping when he hears his friend’s voice. The voice says, “I’ve got some good news and some bad news. The good news is that there’s baseball in heaven.” “What’s the bad news?” “You’re pitching on Wednesday.” (Grandparent Jokes)\Why was the pitcher from the moon of Endor cut from the baseball team?… Ewoked every batter. (May the 4th Be With You Jokes & Star Wars Jokes for Kids)
- If Blackbeard played Major League Baseball who would he play for?… The Pittsburgh Pirates. (Top 10 Sports Jokes / Baseball Jokes / Football Jokes)
- Golf is harder than baseball, in golf you have to play your foul balls. (Golf Jokes)
- Which takes longer to run: from first to second base or from second to third base?… From second to third base, because there is a shortstop in the middle. (Track Jokes)
- Did you hear the joke about the baseball?… It will leave you in stitches! (Doctor Jokes for Kids)
- Have you ever seen a line drive?… No, but I have seen a baseball park!
- What animal is always at a high school baseball game?… A bat. (High School Jokes & Bat Jokes)
- “Did you hear the joke about the pop fly?”… “Forget it. It’s way over your head.” (Biology Jokes for Kids)
- Teacher: Johnny, what are the last words of “The Star-Spangled Banner”?… Student: “Play ball”? (Flag Day Jokes for Kids)
- Do you know what cupcakes & a baseball team have in common?… They both count on the batter! (Cupcake Jokes)
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Woo… Woo, who?… What are you cheering for in baseball in the Summer Olympics in Tokyo? (Summer Olympic Knock Knock Jokes)
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about baseball? (Summer Olympic Knock Knock Jokes)
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good baseball knock-knock jokes?
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good baseball knock knock jokes? (June Jokes & Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
- What sport do people who listen to loud, deep music from their stereo play?… BASS Ball! (Baseball Jokes & Music Jokes)
- When Dr. Anthony Fauci plays baseball, what position is he?… Catcher, he can always wear a mask! (Doctor Jokes)
- What’s a baseball player’s least favorite Star Wars movie?… The Umpire Strikes Back. (Star Wars Jokes)
- A man at a baseball game wondered why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then it hit him.
- Why was the middle school voice teacher so good at baseball?… Because she had the perfect pitch. (Music Jokes & Baseball Jokes)
- “Why do we sing ‘Take Me Out to the Ballgame’ when we’re already there?” (Music Jokes)
- A rookie pitcher was struggling at the mound, so the catcher walked out to have a talk with him. “I’ve figured out your problem,” he told the pitcher. “You always lose control at the same point in every game.” “When is that?” “Right after the national anthem.” (Music Jokes)
- This really was supposed to be a joke! Why did the baseball manager get arrested (and fired)?… for stealing signs. (Police Jokes & Labor Day Jokes)
- What cartoon character is the best at baseball?… Homer Simpson.
- Bob didn’t believe that Fred’s dog could talk. So Fred asked his dog, “What’s on top of a house?”…“Roof,” the dog barked. Bob wasn’t convinced. So Fred asked the dog how sandpaper feels….“Rough.” He still wasn’t convinced. “O.K., who was the greatest baseball player of all time?” Fred asked the dog….“Ruth.” With that, Bob walked away, shaking his head in disbelief. The dog turned to Fred and asked: “Was it Hank Aaron?” (Dog Jokes)
- Which superhero is the best at baseball?… Batman. (Batman Jokes)
- How do the Blue Jays get ready for a game?… The worm-up! (Worm Jokes & Canada Day Jokes)
- Did you hear Ted Danson is the spokesperson for May Day… Of course, he played Sam “May Day” Malone in the sitcom Cheers. (May Day Jokes)
- A grandfather from Brooklyn decided to prepare her will and make her final requests. He told her rabbi he had two final requests. First, he wanted to be cremated, and second, he wanted her ashes scattered over Yankee Stadium. “Yankee Stadium!” the rabbi exclaimed. “Why Yankee Stadium?” “Then I’ll be sure my son visits me once a week.”
- Why did the Christmas tree get in trouble with the umpire?… Too much pine tar on his bat. (Christmas Tree Jokes)
- What Dr. Seuss baseball book was never published?… “The Cat at Bat!” (Dr. Seuss Jokes & Book Jokes)
- What is a baseball player’s favorite thing about going to the park?… The swings!
- Why did the baseball player shut down his website?… He wasn’t getting any hits!
- Why did the police officer go to the baseball game?… Someone stole second base! (Police Jokes for Kids)
- Which position is the best water boy?… The pitcher.
- What has 18 legs and catches flies?… A baseball team!
- How long did the baseball player spend in the library?… Five minutes. It was a short stop. (Library Jokes)
- What do you call a groundhog that plays baseball?… A ball hog. (Ground Hog Day Jokes)
- You are locked inside a car with nothing but a baseball bat. How do you get out?… Unlock the door, of course! (Car Jokes)
- What does Frosty the Snowman wear on his head when he plays baseball?… An ice cap. (Frosty the Snowman Jokes)
- Two baseball teams play a game. The home team ends up winning, but not a single man from either team has touched a base. How can this be?… The teams were all-women.
- What does the Chicago Cubs’s name stand for?… Completely Useless By September.
Why don’t baseball players join unions?… Because they don’t like to be called out on strikes.
What do baseball players eat on?… Home plates.
What is the difference between a boy who is late for dinner and a baseball hit over the fence?… One runs home and the other is a home run.
What is the best advice to give a young baseball player?… If you don’t succeed at first, try second base.
Why was the piano tuner hired to play baseball?… Because he had perfect pitch.
What goes all the way around a baseball field but never moves?… The fence!
Little League Vampire: Dad, what’s the best way to hold a bat?… Father Vampire: By the wings, son. (Top 10 Father’s Day Jokes)
Where do coal diggers play baseball?… In the miner (minor) leagues.
Where did the baseball player wash his socks?… In the bleachers.
What do baseball pitchers and TSA agents have in common?… Fireworks go off in the sky if they do their job incorrectly. (Fireworks Jokes)
Why didn’t the Confederate soldier want to go to the baseball game?… He heard the Yankees were playing. (Top Social Studies Jokes)
Why did the baseball batter go crazy?… The pitcher kept throwing screwballs.
How can you pitch a winning baseball game without throwing a ball?… Only throw strikes.
Riddle: A man leaves home, makes a left turn, makes another left, then another left turn and goes home again. When he gets home there are two men wearing masks waiting for him. Who are they?… The catcher and the umpire.
Which baseball manager’s last name is Italian for ‘a long-bladed weapon of war?’ Tommy Lasorda
How do baseball players keep in touch?….They touch base every once in a while.
Manager: Our new infielder cost $10 million. I call him our “Wonder Player.”… Every time he plays, I wonder why I bothered to get him.
Why are baseball games at night?… Because bats sleep during the day! (Bats at the Beach is a Great Summer Book!)
What is Clarence’s (It’s a Wonderful Life) favorite baseball team?… The Angels! (Christmas Jokes)
Why did the Brookside Angels have a ghost on their team? To add a little team spirit. (101 Halloween Jokes)
Why are singers good at baseball?… Because they have perfect pitch! (Music Jokes)
Where does a catcher sit for dinner?… Behind the plate.
Did you hear the joke about your pitching style?”… “Never mind. It’s foul.”
Which baseball manager was arrested for arson as a teenager and retains his jailhouse nickname to this day?… Sparky Anderson
Why is it so windy at Candlestick Park?… Because of all the Giant Fans! (Earth Day Jokes)
Why do you need to take a baseball player with you when you go camping?… To pitch the tent.
Which baseball players is a fruitarian?… Darryl Strawberry
What is a baseball player’s favorite learning tool? … a slide ruler. (Math Jokes for Kids)
What is the difference between Yankee fans and dentists?… One roots for the yanks, and the other yanks for the roots.
Did you know baseball is the first sport in the Bible?… In Genesis it says, “In the big inning!”
The pitcher really had good control today… Didn’t miss a bat for three innings!
Why are baseball players so rich?… Because they play on diamonds!
There once was a pitcher so bad, the crowd started singing Take Him Out of The Ball Game!
What would you get if you crossed a pitcher and the Invisible Man?… Pitching like no one has ever seen.
A book never written: “The Quickest Baseball Game” by Earl E. Wynn.
What baseball team did Columbus root for?… The Mariners. (Columbus Day Jokes)
Why was the mummy sent into the game as a pinch hitter?… Because the manager knew, once he sent the mummy in the game would be all wrapped up.
Two guys are walking down a street in hell when it begins to snow. One guy looks up at it and says, “Well, it finally happened. The Cubs just won the World Series.”
What did the baseball glove say to the ball?…”Catch ya later!”
Which baseball player holds water?…The pitcher.
Son: Dad, what does a ballplayer do when his eyesight starts going bad? Dad: He gets a job as an umpire. (Top 10 Father’s Day Jokes)
What do male cattle use to write?… Bullpens!
Which baseball player loved ﬁreplaces?… Mickey Mantle.
Why are some umpires such healthy eaters?…They always clean their plate!
A book never written: “How to Be a Better Baseball Player” by Ben Schwarmer. (Book Jokes)
Baseball Riddle: “Why is it called the World Series if only North American teams can play?”
Why are spiders good baseball players?… Because they know how to catch flies! (Funny Animal Jokes for Kids)
What kind of a pitch did Sandy Koufax of the old Burger-lyn Dodgers have?… A fastball – a sizzler. (Hamburger Jokes)
Which baseball player is least likely to catch COVID-19?… A catcher, he always wears a mask!
What famous Greek might have invented baseball?… Homer.
What do baseball players use to bake a cake?… Oven MITTS, BUNT pans and BATTER. (Cake Jokes)
When does royalty watch a baseball game?… When it is a knight game! (Knight Jokes)
What do male cattle use to write about in baseball?… Bullpens!
What do you call an infant that cries a lot?… Baby Ruthless. (Candy Jokes & Baby Jokes)
Why is Spider-Man such a good baseball player?… He knows how to catch flies. (Spiderman Jokes for Kids)
Why don’t matches play baseball?… One strike and your out!
“Did you hear the joke about the fast pitch?”… “Forget it. You just missed it.”
What does a bookworm do during a baseball game?… Worm the bench. (Worm Jokes)
Did you hear Ted Danson is the spokesperson for May Day… Of course, he played Sam “May Day” Malone in the sitcom Cheers. (Top 10 May Day Jokes)
What baseball position does Spider-Man like most?… The outfield because he catches the most flies. (Spiderman Jokes for Kids)
What do you call a winged insect that hits home runs?… A fly swatter.
Did you hear about the love affair between Mr. Goodbar and Peppermint Patty… They had a baby, Ruth. (Candy Jokes)
Why do girls like baseball?… It’s the only sport played on a diamond!
Why are frogs good outfielders?… They never miss a fly. (Frog Jokes)
Why was Cinderella so bad at baseball?…She had a pumpkin for a coach.
What do you get when you cross a tree with a baseball player?… Babe Root. (Top 10 Arbor Day Jokes)
Do you know what cakes & a baseball team have in common?… They both count on the batter! (Cake Jokes)
What do you get when you cross a baseball player with a monster?… a double header! (101 Halloween Jokes)
What are the rules in zebra baseball?… Three stripes and you’re out.
Why was Cinderella kicked off the baseball team?… She ran away from the ball.
What sport do people who listen to loud, deep music from their stereo play?… BASS Ball! (Baseball Jokes)
Why is Fenway Park the coolest place to be?… Because it’s full of fans.
How is a baseball like a pancake?… They both need a good batter.
Where does a baseball player go when he needs a new uniform?… New Jersey (New Jersey teachers are great tutors!)
Why did the baseball player bring a pacifier to the game?… He wanted to play like the Babe.
One morning in elementary school, the students were going to a geography class. The teacher wanted to show the students where cities and states are. The teacher asks the class, “Does anyone know where Pittsburgh is?” Billy raises up his hand and says, “Yeah, Pennsylvania!”. The teacher replies, “Very good, Billy!, now can anyone tell me were Detroit is?” Suzy raises her hand and says, “That’s in Michigan!” The teacher again says, “Very good.” Trying to confuse the children, she now asks, “Where’s Kansas City?” Tommy raises his hand and says, “Oh Oh Pick me!!!, I know?” The teacher says, “OK, Tommy where is Kansas City?” “Last place.”
What animal is best at hitting a baseball?… A bat!
If a basketball team were chasing a baseball team, what time would it be?… Five after nine. (9:05)
Why couldn’t the fans get soda pop at the double header?… Because the home team lost the opener.
Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Jose… Jose who? Jose can you see be the dawn’s early light.
Why did the baseball team hire a cook?… They needed a good batter.
One hit struck a chicken… Now that was a real “fowl ball!”
What do you get if you cross a lizard with a baseball player?… An outfielder who catches flies with his tongue.
Where can you find the largest diamond in the world?… On a baseball field.
One Day the Devil challenged the Lord to a baseball game. Smiling the Lord proclaimed, “”Very well, But you realize that we’ve got all the good players, Babe Ruth, Mickey Mantle, and the best coaches.” The devil snickered, “I know, and that’s all right, We’ve got all the umpires.”
Why did the police arrest the baseball player?… He stole 3rd base!
What do you get when you cross a baseball pitcher with a carpet?… A throw rug.
Which baseball player makes flapjacks?… The batter!
Why did the sausage quit playing baseball?… Because he was the wurst on his team. (Hot Dog Jokes)
If brownie mix is on first base, pudding on second, and cookie dough on third base, who is hitting at the plate?… The cake batter.
Knock – knock… Who’s there?… Uriah…Uriah who?… Keep Uriah on the ball.
Knock – knock… Who’s there?… Phillip… Phillip who?… Let’s phillip the bases.
A baseball scout found a remarkable prospect–a horse who was a pretty good fielder and who hit the ball every time he was up at bat. The scout got him a try-out with a big league team. Up at bat, the horse slammed the ball into far left field and stood at the plate, watching it go. “Run!” the manager screamed, “Run!” “Are you kidding?” answered the horse. “If I could run, I’d be in the Kentucky Derby.”
What happens to baseball players who go blind?… They become umpires.
What do Jose Offerman and Michael Jackson have in common?… They both where a glove for no apparent reason.
Why couldn’t Robin play baseball?… He forgot his bat, man.
Why is it always cool at a baseball game?… Because that is where all the fans are!
MLB is deciding whether or not to reinstate Pete Rose in the 2024 season. When asked about it, Rose said, “I hope they do, cause I’ve got $50 riding on it.”
A doctor at an insane asylum decided to take his patients to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands. When the day of the game arrived, everything seemed to be going well. As the National Anthem started…….the doctor yelled, “Up Nuts” And the patients complied by standing up. After the anthem …he yelled, “Down Nuts”. And they all sat back down in their seats. After a home run was hit, the doctor yelled, “Cheer Nuts”. They all brokeout into applause and cheered. When the umpire made a particularly bad call against the star of the home team, the Doctor yelled, “Booooo Nuts!!!” and they all started booing and cat calling. Thinking things were going very well. The doctor decided to go get a beer and a hot dog, leaving his assistant in charge. When he returned, there was a riot in progress. Finding his assistant, the doctor asked,” What in the world happened? “The assistant replied, “Well, everything was going just fine till a vendor passed by and yelled PEANUTS!
Why did the vampire strike out?… He used the wrong bat!
How is a baseball like a waffle?… They both need a good batter.
Why is hotter after a baseball game?… All the fans have left.
When should baseball players wear armor?… When they play knight games.
When did the baseball team tie up the game?… five to five (4:55) or 10 to 10 (9:50)
When is a baseball player like a spider?… When he catches flies.
Why is a baseball umpire like an angry chicken?… They both have foul mouths!
What is the difference between baseball and law?… In baseball, if you’re caught stealing, you’re out.
A teacher asks her students if they’re Yankees fans. All of the hands go up except for one student. “Okay, Bobby. What team are you a fan of?” “The Red Sox.”
“Why’s that?” “Well, my parents are both Red Sox fans, so I’m a Red Sox fan too.”
“That’s not a good answer, Bobby. If your parents were both morons, would you be a moron too?”
“No, that would make me a Yankees fan!”
Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?… In the big inning, Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel, and the Prodigal Son came home. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.
Three old ladies are at their first baseball game. The friends are drinking a bottle of Jack Daniels and the bottle is now almost gone. What inning is it, and how many are on base… Bottom of the 5th and the bags are loaded.
Why was the mummy sent into the game as the closer?… Because the manager knew, once he sent the mummy in the game would be all wrapped up.
During a baseball game in Redmond, John was Redmond’s lead-off batter. There were no substitutions or changes in the Redmond batting order at all during the nine-inning game. John came to bat in every inning. What is the least number of runs Redmond could have scored?… Zero. In the first inning John and the next two batters walk and the next three strike out. In the second inning, the first three walk again, which brings John back to bat. But each runner is caught off base by the pitcher, so John is back at the plate at the start of the third inning. This pattern is now repeated until the game ends.
A man takes a baseball and throws it as hard as he can. There is nothing in front, behind, or to either side of him, and yet the ball comes back and hits him square in the face. How can this be?… He threw the ball up.
A man is trapped in a house without windows, doors, or any other way of exiting. The house is collapsing, and the man has only a baseball and a bat. How does he escape the fire?…. He swings at the air three times (‘cause it’s one, two, three strikes and you’re out!).
What are OJ’s favorite baseball teams?… The Red Sox and the Dodgers.
Where is the largest diamond in New York City kept?… In Yankee Stadium.
What are the best kind of stockings for baseball players to wear?… Stockings with runs in them.
Why did the Yankees play in Jellystone Park?… Because Yogi wasn’t allowed to leave the park.
What is the opposite of “you’re out?”… Urine. (Nurse Jokes)
Why does a pitcher raise one leg when he pitches?… If he raised both legs, he would fall down.
Two baseball teams played a game. One team won but no man touched base. How could that be?… It was a girls’ baseball team.
What has 72 arms and catches flies?… An octopus baseball team. (Octopus Jokes)
Why are baseball games at night?… Because bats are nocturnal!
Why don’t orphans play baseball?… They don’t know where home is.
Golf is what you play when you’re too out of shape to play baseball.