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Summer Guest Blogs & Summer Jokes for Kids

More Summer Jokes…

  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best summer jokes. (Summer Knock Knock Jokes)
  2. The boss stood before them. “Winter,” he began. “I need you to stay cool in the face of pressure. Ice in your veins,” he said, patting his shoulder. “Then there’s you, Summer,” he continued. “If the heat becomes too much for Winter, use that hot temper of yours to make sure the cops remember who they’re working for. “As for you, Spring,” he chuckled, “this operation is gonna bring in a lotta green. Make sure that it keeps growing.” He turned for the door as Autumn stood up. “Boss!” he sputtered. “What about me?” The boss turned back, shaking his head. “Sorry, son. You’re just the Fall guy.” (Winter Jokes / Summer Jokes
  3. What do you call a pumpkin that works at the beach?… a life ghourd. (Summer Jokes & Pumpkin Jokes)
  4. Autumn is better than summer… Nope, that’s a fall-acy. (Fall Jokes)
  5. Where do sharks go on summer vacation?… Finland! (Shark Jokes for Kids)
  6. Do fish go on summer vacation?… No, because they’re always in schools! (Fishing Jokes & Summer Jokes)
  7. What is a math teacher’s favorite sum?… Summer! (Math Jokes for Kids)
  8. Where do math teachers like to go on summer vacation?… Times Square! (Math Jokes for Teachers & New York Jokes)
  9. What do you call a French guy in sandals?… Phillipe Phloppe. (Flip Flop Jokes for Kids & Geography Jokes for Kids)
  10. What did the pig say at the beach on a hot summer’s day?… I’m bacon! (Pig Jokes & Bacon Jokes)
  11. Memorial Day PSA: On one hand fireworks are a lot of fun. On the other hand I only have 2 fingers. (Fireworks Jokes & Biology Jokes for Kids)
  12. Hockey players are known for their summer teeth… Summer here, summer there. (Dentist Jokes & Hockey Jokes)
  13. Where do goldfish go on summer vacation?… Around the globe! (Ocean Jokes for Kids & Geography Jokes for Kids)
  14. Which letter is the coolest in the summer?… Iced t. (Iced Tea Jokes & 26 Kindergarten Lessons: Letter of The Week)
  15. Hot Dog Pun: “Let me be frank, I love summertime.” (Hot Dog Jokes)
  16. What do math teachers serve for dessert during the summer?… Pi. (Pi Math Jokes & Dessert Jokes)
  17. Why did the lobster blush?… It saw the ocean’s bottom. (Ocean Jokes for Kids & Lobster Jokes for Kids)
  18. What do you call a dog on the beach in the summer?… A hot dog! (Hot Dog Jokes for Kids & Dog Jokes for Kids)
  19. The doctor has given me two months to live. I’ve chosen August and December, because I like summer but don’t want to miss Christmas. (Summer Jokes & Christmas Jokes)
  20. During a heat wave, what do you call a dog?… A hot dog, and in the winter it’s a chili dog. (Hot Dog Jokes / Summer Jokes / Winter Jokes)
  21. What school do kids like to go to during the summer?… Sundae school – because of all the ice cream! (Jokes for the Last Day of School & Summer Jokes)
  22. How do surfers do in summer school?… Not too good. Just a little above C level. (Surfing Jokes & Jokes for Teachers)
  23. Teacher: Where did your mom go for her summer vacation? Student: Alaska. Teacher: Never mind, I’ll ask her myself. (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  24. What do frogs like to drink on a hot summer day?… Croak-o-cola. (Frog Jokes for Kids)
  25. What do pancakes wear to the beach?… A flip-flops! (Pancake Jokes)
  26. “Have you heard of Murphy’s law?” “Yeah.” “What is it?” “If something can go wrong, it will go wrong.” “That’s right. Have you heard of Cole’s law?” “No, what is it?” “Thinly sliced cabbage and mayo.” (Father’s Day Jokes & Farming Jokes)
  27. I just bought a new hat with a built-in fan that keeps my head cool during hot weather… It really blows my mind. (Hat Jokes & Earth Day Jokes)
  28. What did one bee say to the other bee in summer?… Swarm here isn’t it! (Bee Jokes)
  29. What do you do if you get rejected at the sunscreen company?… Reapply (Labor Day Jokes)
  30. Why do bananas use sunscreen?… Because they peel. (Banana Jokes for Kids)
  31. How do bees get to summer school?… By school buzz! (Bee Jokes for Kids & 180 School Jokes)
  32. This Memorial Day weekend, it is important to remember those who lost their battle to be swimsuit-ready by summer. (Memorial Day Jokes) 
  33. What do you pay to spend a day on the beach?… Sand dollars. 
  34. What’s the best day to go to the beach in the summer?… SUN day!
  35. The seaside resort we visited last summer was so boring that one day the tide went out and never came back. (Ocean Jokes for Kids)
  36. What part of the fish weighs the most?… The scales
  37. How do we know that the ocean is friendly?… It waves!
  38. What summer vacation destination makes a pet bird sing for joy?… The Canary Islands! (World Geography Jokes)
  39. Where do eggs go on summer vacation?… New Yolk City! (Geography Jokes for Kids & Egg Jokes for Kids)
  40. First dog: Where do fleas go for summer vacation? Second dog: Search me? (Dog Jokes for Kids)
  41. When do you go at red and stop at green?… When you’re eating a watermelon. (Watermelon Jokes for Kids)
  42. What did the bread do on summer vacation?… It loafed around. (Travel Guest Blogs)
  43. Why did the teacher jump into the pool?… He wanted to test the water! (Summer Jokes for Teachers)
  44. How is the student’s grade like going on summer beach vacation?… It was at C level. (Jokes for the Last Day of School & Jokes for Teachers)
  45. Why don’t mummies go on summer vacation?… They’re afraid to relax and unwind! (Mother’s Day Jokes for Kids)
  46. What animal is always at a summer baseball game?… A bat. 
  47. Fence Company Sign: Our favorite summer sport is fencing. (Fencing Jokes)
  48. What’s that new summer pirate movie rated?…It’s rated ARRRRRR! (Pirate Jokes for Kids)
  49. What travels all around the world in the summer but stays in one corner?… A postage stamp!
  50. How come there’s no Knock Knock joke about America?… Because freedom rings. (Knock Knock Jokes for Kids)
  51. What kind of tan did pilgrims get at the beach?… Puritan. (Summer Jokes & Thanksgiving Jokes)
  52. What do you call seagulls that live near the bay?… Bagels.
  53. Best Summer Vacation Book Never Written: “Where to Stay on Vacation” by Moe Tell.
  54. Where do cows go on their summer vacation?… Moo York. (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  55. Why did the robot go on summer vacation?… He needed to recharge his batteries. (Computer Jokes for Kids)
  56. What is a frog’s favorite summertime treat?… Hopsicles! 
  57. What does a mermaid use to call her friends in the summer?… A shell phone.
  58. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about summer? (Summer Knock Knock Jokes)
  59. What does the sun drink out of?… SUN glasses
  60. Winnie-the-Pooh is on a Picnic with Christopher Robin, Piglet and Eeyore. Christopher Robin says “Pooh, you haven’t touched any food yet. What gives?” Pooh: “I’m stuffed!” (Winnie the Pooh Jokes)
  61. Why can’t basketball players go on summer vacation?… They’d get called for traveling! (Basketball Jokes for Kids)
  62. What do you call witches who live on the beach?… Sandwitches! (Massachusetts Jokes for Kids)
  63. What did one tide pool say to the other tide pool?… Show me your mussels. (Ocean Jokes for Kids)
  64. Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?… To make up for his miserable summer. (Fall Jokes for Kids)
  65. Where do sheep go for summer vacation?… The Baa-hamas. (World Geography Jokes)
  66. What kind of fruit did Avogadro eat in the summer?… Watermolens! (Mole Day Jokes &Watermelon Jokes)
  67. What did the reporter say to the ice cream?… What’s the scoop?
  68. Why are mountains the funniest place to go on summer vacation?… They are hill-arious.
  69. Why is Rabbit’s home so cool during the summer?… It has hare-conditioning. (Winnie the Pooh Jokes)
  70. Where do ghosts like to boat on summer vacation?… Lake Eerie. 
  71. Why did the summer school teacher wear sunglasses?…. Because her students were getting brighter! (Top Summer Jobs for Teachers & Summer School Jokes)
  72. July 4th PSA: On one hand fireworks are a lot of fun. On the other hand I only have 2 fingers. (Fireworks Jokes & Biology Jokes for Kids)
  73. What did the ocean say to the lifeguard?… Nothing, it just waved.
  74. How do teddy bears keep their den cool in summer?… They use bear conditioning!
  75. What’s every pirate’s favorite flavor potato chip at a summer picnic?… Barrrrrrbeque. (Pirate Jokes for Kids)
  76. What do ghosts like to eat in the summer?… I Scream.
  77. Where did Tarzan go on summer vacation?… Hollywood and Vine. (Disney Jokes for Kids & Geography Jokes for Kids)
  78. What do penguins like to wear on the beach?… A beak-ini. (Beach Jokes & Summer Jokes)
  79. What is a beach bum’s favorite month?… “Tan” uary! (January Jokes)
  80. My wife and I just had a daughter and named her JuneJulyAugust… We call her Summer for short. (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month & Baby Jokes)
  81. What do you call a cantaloupe in a kiddie pool?… A watermelon. 
  82. What do hockey players drink on hot summer days?… Iced tea. (Iced -Tea Jokes & Hockey Jokes)
  83. When Santa is on the beach what do the elves call him?… Sandy Claus. (Christmas Jokes & Elf Jokes)
  84. Why did the gymnast put extra salt on her food in the summer?… She wanted to do summer salts. (Gymnastics Jokes)
  85. What does a bee do when it is hot?… He takes off his yellow jacket. (Bee Jokes for Kids)
  86. Why is Luke Skywalker always invited on picnics?… He always has the forks with him. (May the 4th Be With You Jokes)
  87. What do math teachers eat during summer vacation?… Square meals! (Summer Jokes)
  88. What do you call a cat at the beach?…. Sandy claws. (Christmas Jokes for Kids)
  89. How is a poor student’s grade like going snorkeling ?… It was below C level. (Jokes for the Last Day of School & Jokes for Teachers)
  90. How do elephants stay cool?… Ear Conditioning! (Elephant Jokes)
  91. What exercise can you do at the pool?… Pool-ups!
  92. What do penguins drink in the summer?… Iced tea. (Iced Tea Jokes & Penguin Jokes)
  93. What’s the best kind of sandwich for the beach?… Peanut butter and jellyfish.
  94. What’s black, white and red all over?… A penguin with a sunburn! (Penguin Jokes)
  95. What shoes do penguins wear in the summer?… Flipper flops. (Flip Flop Jokes & Summer Jokes)
  96. What do you get when you combine an elephant with a fish?…: Swimming trunks! 
  97. What can’t your parents make you do during the summer?… Your school homework.
  98. What did the kid say when the instructor told him he’d missed summer school?… “No, sir. I didn’t miss it at all.” 
  99. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good summer knock-knock joke? (Summer Knock Knock Jokes)
  100. Why was the boy wearing sunglasses on the prom?… He had a bright date! (Prom Jokes)
  101. What kind of yard work does the Cat in the Hat like the most?… Meowing the lawn.
  102. What did the beach say as the tide came in?… Long tide no sea. (Geography Jokes for Kids & Ocean Jokes for Kids)
  103. How is a bad student’s grade like going scuba diving?… It was below C level. (Jokes for the Last Day of School & Jokes for Teachers)
  104. What do snowmen do in summer?… Chillout.
  105. A Summer book never written: “Vacations Are So Expensive” by Seymour Foreles. (Travel Guest Blogs)
  106. Why did the man love his barbecue?… Because it was the grill of his dreams. (Father’s Day Jokes for Kids)
  107. On the first day of school, what did the teacher say her three favorite words were?… June, July & August. (Back to School Jokes & Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
  108. What do you call a snowman in July?… A puddle.  (Christmas Jokes for Kids & July Jokes for Kids)
  109. Why didn’t the elephant buy a suitcase for his summer vacation?… Because he already had a trunk! (Elephant Jokes for Kids)
  110. Why did the detectives show up at the concert at the beach?… Something fishy was going on. 
  111. Why does ice cream always get invited to the party?… It’s cool. 
  112. Why are fish never good tennis players?… Because they never get close to the net! 
  113. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good State knock knock jokes? (Summer Knock Knock Jokes)
  114. Why do golfers carry an extra pair of socks?… In case they get a hole in one. (Sports Jokes for Kids & Golf Jokes for Kids)
  115. How do you prevent a Summer cold?… Catch it in the Winter! (Winter Jokes for Kids)
  116. What kind of music do killer whales like?… They listen to the orca-stra! 
  117. Why did the dog stay in the shade?… It did not want to be a hot dog. (Hot Dog Jokes for Kids & Dog Jokes for Kids)
  118. What has ears but can’t hear?… A cornfield. 
  119. What kind of candy do you get at the airport?… Plane chocolate! 
  120. Why did the summer school teacher wear sunglasses?…. Because her class was so bright! (Top Summer Jobs for Teachers & Summer School Jokes)
  121. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Sadie… Sadie, who?… Sadie Pledge of Allegiance — it’s the Fourth of July! (1st Day of School Jokes Jokes for the Last Day)
  122. What do math teachers worry about during the summer?… Mathema-tick bites.
  123. What do you call six weeks of rain in Scotland?… Summer! (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  124. What race is never run?… A swimming race. (Swimming Jokes for Kids)
  125. Why do fish like to eat worms?… Because they get hooked on them!
  126. What is a shark’s favorite sandwich?… Peanut butter and jellyfish!
  127. What do you call a fish with no eyes?… A fsh. (Biology Jokes for Kids & Ocean Jokes for Kids)
  128. Can a hamburger marry a hot dog?… Only if they have a very frank relationship! (Hamburger Jokes & Wedding Jokes)
  129. Why did the dolphin cross the beach?… To get to the other tide! 
  130. Why should you never blame a dolphin for doing anything wrong?… Because they never do it on porpoise! 
  131. Why did the elephants get kicked out of the pool?… They kept dropping their trunks.
  132. Where do ants go for summer vacation?… Frants. (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  133. What kind of water cannot freeze?… Hot water.
  134. What kind of tree fits in your hand?… A palm tree! 
  135. Did you hear the joke about the Liberty Bell?…Yeah, it cracked me up! (American Revolution Jokes & Pennsylvania Jokes)
  136. What is the difference between a piano and a fish?… You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish.
  137. Why didn’t the sun go to college?… He already had a million degrees. 
  138. How does a cucumber become a pickle?… It goes through a jarring experience.
  139. Why don’t croissants like warm weather?…… Things get Toasty! (Croissant Jokes & Spring Jokes)
  140. What does the Cat in the Hat use to keep his grass trimmed?… A lawn meower. (Cat Jokes & Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  141. Why are gulls named seagulls?… If they were by the bay, they’d be bagels! (Bird Jokes for Kids & Ocean Jokes for Kids)
  142. What did the ocean say to the sailboat?… Nothing, it just waved. (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  143. What does a dentist do on a roller coaster?… He braces himself (Smile Jokes)
  144. First woman: My son came to visit for summer vacation. Second woman: How nice! Did you meet him at the airport? First woman: Oh, no. I’ve known him for years!
  145. The first day of school is exciting, but so is riding a roller coaster, and I wouldn’t want to do that for nine months in a row either. (Back to School Jokes)
  146. What did autumn say to summer?… Make like a tree and leave! (Fall Jokes)
  147. Where does a ship go when it’s sick?… To the DOCK! (Doctor Jokes for Kids)
  148. What do whales like to put on their toast?… Jellyfish! (Whale Jokes for Kids)
  149. What does a shark eat for dinner?… Fish and ships! (Shark Jokes for Kids)
  150. Where does a fish go to borrow money?… The loan shark! (Shark Jokes for Kids)
  151. What do sheep do on sunny days?… Have a baa-baa-cue. (Funny Animal Jokes for Kids)
  152. Why don’t oysters share their pearls?… Because they’re shellfish. (Ocean Jokes for Kids)
  153. Why do fish swim in salt water?… Because pepper makes them sneeze! (Ocean Jokes for Kids & Ocean Jokes for Kids)
  154. What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea?… It gets wet. (World Geography Jokes)
  155. What holds the sun up in the sky?… Sunbeams.
  156. Teacher: Please use the words “letter carrier” in a sentence. Student: Yes, ma’am. “My dad said that after seeing how many things my mom was bringing on vacation, he would rather letter carrier own luggage.” (Mailman Jokes for Kids)
  157. How do you catch a monkey?… Climb a tree and act like a banana. (Monkey Jokes for Kids & Banana Jokes for Kids)
  158. What did the ocean say to the shore?… Nothing it just waved. (Ocean Jokes for Kids & Geography Jokes for Kids)
  159. What do cows wear in Hawaii?… Moo Moo’s. (Cow Joes for Kids & Geography Jokes for Kids)
  160. What did the sea do to the sand?… The sand blushed because the sea weed. (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  161. Teacher: What’s gray, has four legs and a trunk? Student: An elephant. Teacher: No, a mouse on summer vacation. (Elephant Jokes for Kids)
  162. What’s brown, hairy and wears sunglasses?… A coconut on vacation!
  163. What’s black and white and read all over?… A sunburned zebra.
  164. How do men exercise at the beach?… By sucking in their stomach every time they see a bikini.
  165. What do you call a penguin in the desert?… Lost. (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  166. Italy got Hungary, Ate Turkey, Slipped on Greece, Broke China, Went shopping in Iceland, Got eaten by Wales!(Geography Jokes for Kids)
  167. I just flew back from my holiday in Spain…. I bet your arms are tired.(Geography Jokes for Kids)
  168. Why did summer catch autumn?… Because autumn had a fall. (Fall Jokes for Kids)
  169. What did one firefly say to the other firefly when his light went out?… “Give me a push. My battery is dead.” (Summer Jokes)
  170. Where did the sheep go on vacation?… The Baa-hamas! (World Geography Jokes)
  171. How do you prevent a Summer cold?… Catch it in the Winter! (Winter Jokes for Kids)
  172. If you’ve suffered from frostbite and sunburn in the same week… you might be from Montana. (Montana Jokes & Winter Jokes)