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Top Joke Pages: (Watermelon Jokes)

More Watermelon Jokes…

  1. When do you go at red and stop at green?… When you’re eating a watermelon. (Summer Jokes for Kids)
  2. Why do watermelons have fancy weddings?…  Because they cantaloupe. (Wedding Jokes)
  3. What kind of summer camp would a toilet, a mountain lion, and a watermelon all go to?… A John Cougar Melon Camp (Watermelon Jokes & Music Jokes)
  4. What do you call fruit that commits egregious crimes?…  a waterfelon. (Police Jokes for Kids)
  5. What kind of fruit did Avogadro eat in the summer?… Watermolens! (Mole Day Jokes & Summer Jokes)
  6. Why did the farmer plant a seed in his pond?… He was trying to grow a water-melon. (Farming Jokes)
  7. Why did the watermelon go crazy?… He lost his rind. (Psychology Jokes)
  8. What did the fruit write on his Valentine’s card?… You’re one in a melon! (Valentine’s Day Jokes)
  9. Why are watermelons such good gossips?… They have all the juice.
  10. Why are watermelons such good entrepreneurs?… They always have seed money. (Labor Day Jokes)
  11. What do you call a dog that herds watermelons?… A Melon Collie. (Dog Jokes)
  12. What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon?…  Pork rinds. (Pig Jokes)
  13. At my college graduation I saw a bowl of fruit punch…So I told a bunch of my friends “I want to make a joke which requires some audience participation.”Then, I proceeded to instruct them to stand, single file, in front of the bowl. Once they had, I told them “Here’s the punch line.” (Graduation Jokes)
  14. Why are watermelons the saddest fruit?… They get melancholy. (Psychology Jokes)
  15. Why shouldn’t you go into business with a watermelon?… They’re seedy. (Labor Day Jokes)
  16. You know what they say about when life gives you melons?… You might be dyslexic.
  17. John threw one watermelon at Tim, what does Tim have now?… A concussion. (Doctor Jokes)
  18. The watermelon is 50% water.The other 50% is melon.
  19. I almost secretly married a watermelon, but I canteloupe. (Wedding Jokes)
  20. What type of fruit has babies in a red house, a red house in a white house, and a white house in a green house?…  A watermelon! 
  21. Farmer’s patch There was a farmer who grew watermelons. He was doing pretty well, but he was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak into his watermelon patch at night and eat his watermelons. After some careful thought, he came up with a clever idea that he thought would scare the kids away for sure. He made up a sign and posted it in the field. The next day, the kids show up and they saw the sign which read, “Warning! One of the watermelons in this field has been injected with cyanide.” The kids ran off, made up their own sign and posted it next to the farmer’s sign. When the farmer returned, he surveyed the field. He noticed that no watermelons are missing, but the sign next to his read, “Now there are two!” (Farming Jokes)
  22. Why did one melon break up with the other melon?… He didn’t know water problem was.
  23. Why do watermelons take such a long time to make decisions?… They’re always melon it over.
  24. Did you hear about the guy who smashed all those fruits?… It was a slaughter melon.
  25. Did you hear about the watermelon who starred in a telanovella?… It was melondramatic.
  26. Why won’t anyone sit next to a watermelon?… They have a strange smelon.
  27. Do you know what you call the outside of a watermleon?… Rind of.
  28. What’s the difference between a watermelon and a baby’s head?… I don’t know! I’m asking you! (Baby Jokes)
  29. Why did the watermelon have brown spots all over its skin?… It had melonoma. (Doctor Jokes)
  30. Why did the watermelon get left at the altar?… Because his fiance cantelope. (Wedding Jokes)
  31. Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool?… It wanted to become a watermelon. (Swimming Jokes)
  32. What did the watermelon say when the honeydew asked it to run away together?… We cantaloupe! (Wedding Jokes)
  33. What did the watermelon say to the cantaloupe?… You’re one in a melon.
  34. My friend told me that onions are the only edible plant that can make you cry…. I bludgeoned his head with a watermelon.