Dracula Jokes

by | Jul 23, 2021 | Latest News, School Jokes

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(Dracula Jokes)

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  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best Dracula jokes.
  2. How does Dracula order his coffee?…De-coffin-ated. (Coffee Jokes)
  3. Why did Dracula flunk art class?…Because he would only draw blood. (Art Jokes)
  4. Where does Dracula keep his valuables?…At the blood bank.
  5. What do you get if you cross Dracula with Sir Lancelot? …A bite in shining armor. (Knight Jokes)
  6. What words are in Dracula’s family motto?…“Give Blood, Give Life.”
  7. Who does Dracula keep getting letters from?…Members of his fang club.
  8. Why didn’t Dracula get married?… He couldn’t meet a nice ghoul. (Marriage Jokes)
  9. What’s Dracula’s family car called?…A bloodmobile. (Car Jokes)
  10. Why did little Dracula get sent home from school?… Because he was coughin too much. (180 School Jokes)
  11. Why did Dracula break up with his girlfriend after her blood test?…Because she wasn’t his type.
  12. What is Dracula’s sports car called?…The Fangster! (Car Jokes)
  13. Why don’t other vampires like Dracula?…He has a bat temper.
  14. Where does Dracula go on vacation?…He summers in Lake Eerie and winters at The Dead Sea. (New York Jokes)
  15. What did Dracula say to the zombie?…There isn’t a single meal in you. (Zombie Jokes)
  16. What did Dracula say to his victim?… It’s been nice gnawing you.
  17. Why does Dracula make an inexpensive date?… Because he eats necks to nothing.
  18. What happened after Dracula died?… All the blood relatives flew in for the funeral. (Cemetery Jokes)
  19. What’s Dracula’s favorite ice cream flavor?… Vein-illa. (Ice Cream Jokes)
  20. Why doesn’t Dracula have many friends?… Because he’s a total pain in the neck.
  21. Why did Dracula take cold medicine?… To stop his coughin. (Doctor Jokes)
  22. Where does Dracula prefer to eat his lunch?… At the casketeria. (Cemetery Jokes)
  23. What city do Dracula’s Chinese relatives live in?… Fanghai. (World Geography Jokes)
  24. Did you hear, Dracula is throwing a desert Rave?… It’s called Vampire campfire. (Camping Jokes)
  25. Why was Dracula so disappointed in his son?… Because the boy fainted at the sight of blood. (Dad Jokes)
  26. What does Dracula drink when he is dieting?… Blood light. (Beer Jokes)
  27. How does Dracula keep his torch lit?… With batteries. 
  28. Why did Dracula fail his final exam?… He was too ghoul for school. (180 School Jokes)
  29. What do you get if you cross a vampire with a sheep?… Drac-ewe-la. (Sheep Jokes)
  30. What is Dracula’s favorite dance when visiting Spain?…The fang-dango. (World Geography Jokes & Dance Jokes)
  31. Why does Dracula like to travel with his coffin?… Because his life is at stake.
  32. Why did Dracula visit the dentist?… He had a fang-ache. (Dentist Jokes)
  33. How does Dracula feel after a long night out?… Dead on his feet. (Cemetery Jokes)
  34. What is Count Dracula’s favorite restaurant?… Murder King. (Cemetery Jokes)
  35. I saw a half-priced vampire decoration in the Halloween Store… It was a dis-Count Dracula. (Black Friday Jokes)
  36. What name did Dracula give his new boat?… The Blood Vessel.
  37. What do you get if you cross Dracula with AI Capone?… A fangster.
  38. What did Dracula’s son learn at school?… The alphabat! (180 School Jokes)
  39. Why did Dracula become a vegetarian?… Because he heard steak was bad for his heart.
  40. Why doesn’t Dracula suck the blood from chickens?… Their blood is fowl. (Chicken Jokes)
  41. How does Dracula stay in shape?… Batminton. (Badminton Jokes)
  42. What did Dracula say after getting invited inside?… Fangs a lot.
  43. Did you hear about Dracula’s castle?… They completely revamped it. (Knight Jokes)
  44. Why couldn’t Dracula’s wife get any sleep?… Because of his coughin. (Napping Jokes)
  45. What song does Dracula hate most?… You Are My Sunshine. (365 Music Jokes)
  46. What happened after Dracula uploaded illegal content to YouTube?… A-count suspended.
  47. What do you call a vampire that can lift up cars?… Jack-ula. (Car Jokes)
  48. Why does Dracula avoid Las Vegas?… Because of all the high stakes poker. (Nevada Jokes)
  49. How does Dracula clean off all the blood?… He gets in the bat tub.
  50. Why was Dracula taking on a new apprentice?… Because he wanted to see some new blood around. (Labor Day Jokes)
  51. Why wouldn’t Dracula take a bride?… He wanted to stay a bat-chelor. (Marriage Jokes)
  52. How many vampires does it take to screw in a lightbulb?… It depends if you Count Dracula.
  53. What did the teacher say to Dracula after he failed his math test?… Can’t you count Dracula? (180 School Jokes)
  54. What is Transylvania famous for?… It’s Dracula’s terrortory.
  55. What are Dracula’s favorite little dishes to use?… Platelets.  
  56. Who has the most dangerous job in Transylvania?… Dracula’s dentist. (Dracula Jokes & Labor Day Jokes)
  57. What’s Dracula’s favorite ice cream flavor?… Veinilla.
  58. What is the first month of the year in Transyvania?… Janu-eerie. (January Jokes)
  59. Why didn’t Dracula have any friends at school?…He was a pain in the neck! (Dracula Jokes & Vampire Jokes)
  60. Are monsters good at math?… Not unless you Count Dracula. (Halloween Jokes for Teachers)
  61. Are monsters good math teachers?… Not unless you Count Dracula. (Halloween Jokes for Teachers)
  62. Are monsters good math teachers?… Not unless you Count Dracula. (Halloween Jokes for Teachers)
  63. Which Halloween monster is good at math?… Count Dracula! (Math Jokes for Kids)
  64. What did Dracula say then he saw a giraffe for the first time?… I’d like to get to gnaw you.(Giraffe Jokes)