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Google Search “Skiing Jokes”

  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best jokes about skiing.
  2. Say what you want about skiing… ..but the sports going downhill, FAST!
  3. What is a Colorado clouds favorite drink?… Mountain Dew. (Colorado Jokes & Skiing Jokes)
  4. What do you call a slow skier?… A slopepoke!
  5. How many ski instructors does it take to change a light bulb?… 2, one to change the bulb and one to say “Nice turn, nice turn!”
  6. No matter what happens when skiing… the snow must go on.
  7. Ski Pun: I’m going down this hill like there’s snow tomorrow.
  8. What do skiers like most about school?… Snow and tell.
  9. For those in the snow… skiing can be pretty easy.
  10. I’m taking it ice and easy… it;s on my first time skiing.
  11. I broke up with my girlfriend on a ski trip… Our relationship was going downhill.
  12. I was at a ski resort for a psychiatry convention… I’ve never seen so many Freudians slips. (Psychology Jokes)
  13. Ski Pun: I used to be a professional ski athlete… It just went downhill from there. (Labor Day Jokes)
  14. Ski Pun: Don’t get into skiing… It’s a slippery slope.
  15. What do skiers use to correct their mistakes?… Whiteout.
  16. Why do I feel so good when my life and all my friends are going downhill?
  17. Ski Pun: Old skiers go downhill fast.
  18. I snow full well my skiing skills have a long way to come.
  19. Which movie is a favorite of downhill skiers?… “The Little Mermaid” because it has Aerial in it.
  20. Ski Pun: I figured out why ski resorts are so funny… They’re hillareas. (Travel Guest Blogs)
  21. Ski Pun: Ski lifts always chair me up.
  22. I retired from skiing… My skills were just going downhill.
  23. Why did the stock broker go to the ski resort?… He wanted to meet moguls.
  24. Some guy I know from school just brushed past me without a skiing jacket on… I think he was giving me the cold shoulder.
  25. When you are as fast and as experienced a skier as me, the snow conditions can really make a difference… I always say with great powder comes great responsibility.
  26. During ski season… I try to keep a snow profile.
  27. Somebody asked me recently why I took up downhill skiing… I told them uphill skiing was far too difficult.
  28. I was passing gym class with flying colors until we got to the skiing unit… It was downhill from there.
  29. I thought taking a job as a ski instructor would be great… But it really went downhill fast. (Labor Day Jokes)
  30. The skiing trip started well but after I lost my glove at the top of one of the slopes.. it was downhill from there. (Travel Guest Blogs)
  31. Skiing Pick-up Line: I can’t take my ice off you!
  32. Ski Pun: Ski you later.
  33. Ski Pun: Okay, so there’s a beginners slope here, there’s intermediate there, there and there, and snow on and snow forth.
  34. Ski Pun: I am a snowboarder at heart… going skiing is an absolute last resort!
  35. Ski Pun: I’m never board, because I always ski.
  36. I was easily sled in the wrong direction when I was younger… but now I snow where to go myself.
  37. If you aren’t cracking a smile while skiing on the mountain… then you need to have a little change in altitude!
  38. Why should you always invite a skier to Thanksgiving dinner?… They’re great at carving.
  39. What do skiers eat for breakfast?… Frosted Flakes.
  40. I wasn’t meant to be going on the skiing trip with my parents but I hid in the back of the car… When we arrived they called me the snowaway.
  41. Ski Pun: Out on the slopes in the morning… it’s frost come, frost served.
  42. How does a skiers get to work?… By icicle.
  43. What is a skiers favorite type of candy?… Snow caps.
  44. Ski Pun: Every snow often I like to go skiing.
  45. What kind of parties do skiers go to?… Snowballs.
  46. Where does a skier keep his money?… In a snow bank.
  47. Ski Pun: Why wait until spring to go skiing?… There’s snow time like the present!
  48. What do skiers eat for lunch?… Icebergers.
  49. After a long day out skiing, I want to go to a snowball so I can dance like snowbody’s watching.
  50. I didn’t realize how good I would be at going down the slopes… I thought I had peaked when I rode the chairlift.
  51. What’s the difference between a ski instructor and a mutual fund?… Eventually the fund will mature and make a little money!
  52. Did you hear about the man who lost his left arm and leg in a skiing accident?… He ended up being all right.
  53. A friend and I got into a fight on a ski lift… It was an uphill battle.
  54. I am getting snow board of mountains… please may we stop skiing.
  55. Why did the skier only wear one boot?… He heard there would be a 50% chance of snow.
  56. A novice skier often jumps to contusions.
  57. What is a beer enthusiast’s favorite kind of skis?… Brew-skies!!
  58. Ski Pun: I’d like to ski across the whole white world.
  59. To ski or not to ski… that’s a no-brainer.
  60. Why was Cinderella such a bad alpine skier?… Her ski coach was a pumpkin.
  61. My friend had his birthday out on the slopes during our skiing trip… so we all sang ‘Freeze a jolly good fellow!’
  62. Alpine for the slopes once I am back home.
  63. How do snowboarders introduce themselves?… “Sorry dude”
  64. My local ski resort was ripped off last week for around $900… The robber stole a burger, two beers, and some chips.
  65. I recently got very addicted to skiing… My doctor told me I’m going down a slippery slope.
  66. Financial tip: Don’t invest in skiing companies… The entire sport is going downhill fast.
  67. What happened when an icicle landed on the skiers head?… It knocked him out cold.
  68. I had been feeling quite down for the beginning of the skiing trip, all until I got to the top of the run… It was just the lift I needed!
  69. Ski Pun: When I make new friends on the ski slopes I say, “Ice to meet you.”
  70. What do you get when you cross a skier and a vampire?… Frostbite.
  71. When I went to France to learn how to ski… I even needed Alp getting on the chairlift.
  72. What do you call the heels on ski boots? … Ski lifts.
  73. How do you know when a ski instructor walks into the room?… Don’t worry, he’ll tell you.
  74. What did the Austrian skier yell when he sprained his ankle?… Alp! (Skiing Jokes)
  75. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about skiing?
  76. How can you make a small fortune teaching skiing?… Start with a big one!
  77. We want better snow!… Powder to the people!
  78. Ski Pun: My local ski slopes are looking for winterns to make tea.
  79. Ski Pun: I am snowboard of all the skiers in this resort.
  80. What do skiers get from sitting on the snow too long?… Polaroids.
  81. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good skiing knock-knock joke?
  82. How many ski instructors does it take to change a light bulb?… A dozen. One to unscrew the bulb and the rest to analyze the turns.
  83. What’s the difference between a ski bum and a pizza pie?… The pizza can actually feed a family of four.
  84. What did one skier say to the other?… Alpine for you when you’re gone. (Skiing Jokes)
  85. I was skiing so fast down the slopes and crashed into a drift at the bottom… It was a total whiteout!
  86. I warned him about starting his own ski resort… It’s a slippery slope. (Skiing Jokes)
  87. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good skiing knock knock jokes? (June Jokes Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
  88. I went skiing yesterday. It was fun but I broke arm… I guess skiing has its downsides.
  89. What does a blind man use to ski?… A skiing eye dog.
  90. “You know what Telemarking means in Norwegian?… “Wait for me!”
  91. How many telemark skiers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?… Two. One to turn the build while the other says “nice turns brah!”
  92. Why shouldn’t you let somebody who just got out of rehab go skiing?… Because it’s a slippery slope.
  93. Ski Pun: Frost impressions matter out on the slopes!
  94. Why did the dairy farmer move to a ski area?… He heard that skiers do milk runs.
  95. After I did my first ski jump my dad patted me on the back and said “I glove you.”
  96. Why was the skier taken to the hospital?… He hurt his ski bum.
  97. Why aren’t skiers fun to be around when they’re going up a mountain on a lift?… Because they’re always looking down on you.
  98. I need everyone to wish me luck. I have a meeting at the bank later and if all goes well, I will be out of debt… I’m so excited I can barely put on my ski mask.
  99. Ski Pun: I have only been skiing once or ice before.
  100. What do you call three Russians skiing down a small hill?… A Triple Low Ski.
  101. What do you call a monkey who wins an Olympic gold medal for downhill skiing?… A chimpion.
  102. How do you get a snowboarder off your porch?… Pay him for the pizza.
  103. What do you call a ski bum who has broken up with his girlfriend?… Homeless!
  104. What do you call a ski bum who has broken up with her boyfriend?… Homeless!
  105. Why are ski respirts so funny?… Because they’re hill areas.
  106. Why are mountains so funny?… Because they’re hill areas.
  107. What do skiers call their list of things they want to do in their lifetime?… Brain Bucket list
  108. Which skiers wear the biggest boots?… The one with the biggest feet!
  109. What do ski repairmen eat their meals on?… Baseplates.
  110. Why did the beginner skier go to the pet store?… He was told he needed salopettes.
  111. Why did the skier always expect the worst when he reached the top of the mountain?… knew it was all downhill from there…
  112. How do Jewish skiers greet each other?… Slalom.
  113. Ski Pun: I have to take care of my mental well-skiing.
  114. How do skiers correct their typing mistakes?… White out!
  115. Why did the farmer bring cattle to the ski mountain?… He heard it was the best place for steers (sounds like skiers).
  116. Why are scrambled eggs like a losing alpine skier?… Because they’ve both been beaten.
  117. Three snowboarders are riding in the back of a car. Who is driving?… The police.
  118. What is the difference between God and a Ski Schooler?… God doesn’t think he’s a Ski Schooler…
  119. When skiing on the beginners slope… I am such a snow burn.
  120. Why go to the beach?… I’d rather be by the ski-side.
  121. Ski Pun: I made the switch to snowboard because I knew I was going down a slippery slope with skiing.
  122. Ski Pun: Last time I went to the slopes was at Christmas… It really was the ski-son to be jolly.
  123. As I got off the chairlift, I came to the realization that skiing is not for me… It all went downhill from there.
  124. What is the difference between a ski instructor and a skiing student?… 3 days.
  125. What is a skiers favorite game?… Ice Spy with my little eye…
  126. Why did the Ski Instructor want a divorce?… Because he thought his wife was a flake.

PG-13 jokes

  1. How can you make a small fortune teaching skiing?… Start with a big one!
  2. What’s the difference between a ski instructor and a mutual fund?… Eventually the fund will mature and make a little money!
  3. How do snowboarders introduce themselves?… “SORRY DUDE”
  4. What is the last thing a snowboarder ever says?… “Dude, watch this!”