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Google Search “Movie Jokes”

  1. How did Reese eat her cereal?… Witherspoon. (Movie Jokes)
  2. Where does the Grinch go to watch movies?… The IMAX! (Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  3. A math teacher saw the movie American Pie… She gave it 3.14 stars. (Pi Day Jokes for Teachers)
  4. Last night a movie theater was robbed of over $1000 dollars… The thieves took one large bag of popcorn, two large sodas and a pack of Skittles. (Popcorn Jokes & Candy Jokes)
  5. Bloke down the pub sold me a DVD. It had 3.14 stars. I think it was pi-rated. (Pie Jokes & Pirate Jokes)
  6. If I had a dollar every time a customer complained about the price of cinema food… I could almost afford a small popcorn. (Movie Jokes & Labor Day Jokes)
  7. Where do penguins go to the movies?… At the dive-in! (Penguin Jokes)
  8. I got fined $50 for sneaking popcorn and a drink into the movie theater… It’s ok though, it still saved me money. (Movie Jokes)
  9. I wonder if the first person to pop popcorn suddenly had the urge to… watch a movie. (Movie Jokes)
  10. I got thrown out of the cinema for throwing popcorn at the back of people’s heads… I also lost my job behind the popcorn counter. (Movie Jokes & Labor Day Jokes)
  11. Why is popcorn way better than a movie?… Because they are just so much butter. (Popcorn Jokes)
  12. I went to the Cinema yesterday… …I was buying popcorn, a drink and some candy. As I went to pay I said, “I’m ever so sorry, I’ve only got a $50 note.” The lady said, “That’s ok, you can put the candy back!”(Popcorn Jokes & Candy Jokes)
  13. On the night of his 2017 inauguration, Donald Trump was visited by 3 ghosts. Early in the night, FDR appeared. Trump asked him “How can I make America great again?” FDR replies, “think only of the people; do not make laws based on hatred, bigotry, or with the thought of lining your own pockets.” Trump’s face sours “FAKE NEWS!” he screams and FDR disappears. Trump falls back to sleep. A few hours later, he is awakened by George Washington’s ghost. Trump asks “How can I make America great again?” Washington replies, “I would suggest you never tell a lie.” This infuriates Trump. He screams for his bodyguards but Washington is already gone. Around 3 in the morning, he is visited by the ghost of Abraham Lincoln. Again, he asks “How can I make America great again?” Lincoln thinks for a bit and says “go to the theater.” (Inauguration Jokes & January Jokes)
  14. Do you know the Ghostbusters’ catchphrase in Italian?… I ain’t alfredo no ghost! (Ghost Jokes & Pasta Jokes)
  15. What did the spaghetti say to the lasagna as he was murdering him… Pasta La vista, Baby!
  16. When born, Arnold Schwarzenegger got a job serving spaghetti for a local coffee shop… He was known as the pasta barista baby. (Coffee Jokes & Spaghetti Jokes)
  17. I’ve heard the reviews for the new Grinch movie have been bad. One reviewer asked theater goers if they would watch The Grinch or a video of a sea sick crocodile, and 90% proffered watching the sea sick crocodile. (Grinch Jokes)
  18. Where does the Grinch go to watch movies?… The IMAX! (Grinch Jokes)
  19. Which body part are mermaids scared of?… Jaws! (Shark Jokes)
  20. Did you see the movie about the hot dog?… It was an Oscar Wiener. (Hot Dog Jokes)
  21. The 2012 film Lincoln did well in theaters, historically this has not been true. (Civil War Jokes & Movie Jokes)
  22. If Dorothy missed Kansas, what did Toto miss?… They missed the rains down in Africa. (Music Jokes / Movie Jokes / Rain Jokes / World Geography Jokes)
  23. Who was the burger’s favorite all-time movie director?… Sizzle B. DeMille! (Hamburger Jokes)
  24. What is a runner’s favorite movie?… The Green Mile. (Track & Field Jokes)
  25. What does Arnold Schwarzenegger say before eating pasta?… PASTA LA VISTA BABY. (Pasta Jokes)
  26. I just saw the movie American Pi… I gave it a rating of 3.14. (Pi Day Jokes)
  27. Where do Christmas plants go when they want to become movie stars?… Holly-wood! (Christmas Jokes)
  28. My local movie theater was robbed of almost $10,000The thieves got away with three boxes of popcorn, two large sodas, three boxes of candy and a hotdog. (Hot Dog Jokes / Popcorn Jokes / Candy Jokes)
  29. What did Winnie-the-Pooh say to Jerry Maguire?… “Show me the Honey!” (Winnie the Pooh Jokes)
  30. What did the donut say to the munchin?…. Your complete me! (Donut Jokes)
  31. What’s bacon’s favorite movie?… Grease! (Bacon Jokes)
  32. Have you heard about the new pirate movie?… It’s rated AARRRRGGH! (Pirate Jokes)
  33. Why did the hot dog turn down a chance to star in a major motion picture?… None of the rolls (roles) were good enough. (Hot Dog Jokes)
  34. What’s the name of the movie about bacon?… Hamlet. (Bacon Jokes)
  35. If they made movie starring the Loch Ness Monster and the great white shark from Jaws, what would the movie be called?… Loch Jaws! (Shark Jokes)
  36. Why did Episodes 4, 5, and 6 come out before 1, 2, and 3?… Because in charge of directing, Yoda was. (Star Wars Jokes)
  37. What’s a sharks favorite movie?… Shaw-shark Redemption! (Shark Jokes)
  38. Where do seals go to see movies?… The dive-in! (Movie Jokes & Seal Jokes)
  39. What do you call a Tom Cruise movie with a hamburger in it?… Top Bun. (Hamburger Jokes)
  40. What do you call a cyborg bee?…  The Pollinator! (Bee Jokes for Kids & Flower Jokes)
  41. They are doing a new sequel to the movie “March of the Penguins.”… They are calling it “April of the Penguins!” (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month & Penguin Jokes)
  42. Who is the hamburgers favorite actress?… Candice Berger! (Hamburger Jokes)
  43. Teacher: “Jenny, what do you know that has stars and stripes?” Student: “A movie about a zebra!” (Flag Day Jokes)
  44. Why doesn’t BYU want to be this year’s Cinderella team?… Because the school considers the movie to be inappropriate. (Disney Jokes & Cinderella Jokes)
  45. Why do folks from South Dakota go to the movie theater in groups of 18 or more?… 17 and under are not admitted. (South Dakota Jokes)
  46. Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. However, the gates are closed and Forrest approaches the Gatekeeper. St. Peter says, “Well, Forrest, it’s certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we’ve been administering an entrance examination for everyone. The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven.” Forrest responds, “It shor is good to be here , St. Peter, sir. But nobody ever tolt me about any entrance exam. Shor hope the test ain’t too hard; life was a big enough test as it was.” St. Peter goes on, “Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions: First: What two days of the week begin with the letter T? Second: How many seconds are there in a year? Third: What is God’s first name?” Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter who waves him up and says, “Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers.” Forrest says, “Well, the first one — which two days in the week begin with the letter “T”? Shucks, that one’s easy. That’d be Today and Tomorrow.” The Saint’s eyes open wide and he exclaims, “Forrest, that’s not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I didn’t specify, so I’ll give you credit for that answer. How about the next one?” asks St. Peter. “How many seconds in a year?” “Now that one’s harder,” says Forrest, “but I thunk and thunk about that and I guess the only answer can be twelve.” Confounded, St. Peter says, “Twelve? Twelve!? Forrest, how in Heaven’s name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?” Forrest says “Shucks, there’s gotta be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd,March 2nd. . .” “Hold it, ” interrupts St. Peter. “I see where you’re going with this, and I see your point, though that wasn’t quite what I had in mind…..but I’ll have to give you credit for that one, too. Let’s go on with the third and final question. Can you tell me God’s first name”? “Sure” Forrest replied, “its Andy.” Andy?!” exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St. Peter. “Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?” “Shucks, that was the easiest one of all,” Forrest replied. “I learnt it from the song. . . . “ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN. . . .” St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates and said: “Run Forrest, run.”