Google Search “Halloween Jokes”

  1. Knock, Knock!… Who’s there?… Phillip!… Phillip who?… Phillip my bag with Halloween candy, please!
  2. What do birds say on Halloween?… “Trick or tweet!”
  3. Which Halloween monster is good at math?… Count Dracula!
  4. Why are ghosts terrible liars?… You can see right through them!
  5. Know why skeletons are so calm?… Because nothing gets under their skin.
  6. What do mummies listen to on Halloween?… Wrap music.
  7. Which type of pants do ghosts wear to trick or treat?… Boo jeans.
  8. How do vampires get around on Halloween?… On blood vessels.
  9. Why did the Vampire read The New York Times?… He heard it had great circulation.
  10. Why can’t hockey players dress up for Halloween?… They always take their face off.
  11. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Boo! Boo who? Don’t cry … it’s just my Halloween costume!
  12. Where do fashionable ghosts shop?… Bootiques!
  13. What do witches put on to go trick or treating?… Mas-scare-a.
  14. Why didn’t Jason wear his hockey mask for Halloween?… Because you don’t wear white after Labor Day.
  15. What did the boy ghost say to the girl ghost?… “You sure are boo-tiful!
  16. Who did Frankenstein go trick or treating with?… His ghoul friend.
  17. Knock Knock!… Who’s there?… Olive!… Olive who?… Olive your Halloween costume!
  18. What’s a vampire’s least favorite meal?… A steak!
  19. What is a vampire’s favorite fruit? A neck-tarine!
  20. What makes trick or treating with twin witches so challenging?… You never know which witch is which!
  21. What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert? I scream.
  22. Knock Knock! Who’s there? Bee! Bee who? Bee-ware, there’s a full moon this Halloween!
  23. What’s a monster’s favorite play?… Romeo and Ghouliet!
  24. Why do skeletons have low self-esteem?… They have no body to love.
  25. Knock, Knock. Who’s there? Ben! Ben who? Ben waiting for Halloween all year!
  26. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Witch! Witch who? Witch one of you will give me lots of Halloween candy?
  27. Where does Dracula keep his money?… In a blood bank.
  28. What do owls say when they go trick or treating?… “Happy Owl-ween!”
  29. What does Bigfoot say when he asks for candy?… “Trick-or-feet!”
  30. Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?… Because they have no-body to go with.
  31. Where do ghosts buy their Halloween candy?… At the ghost-ery store!
  32. How do you make a skeleton laugh?… You tickle his funny bone!
  33. What tops off a mummy’s ice cream sundae?… Whipped scream.
  34. What do ghosts give out to trick or treaters?… Booberries!
  35. Why was the candy corn booed off the stage?… All of his jokes were too corny!
  36. What Halloween candy is never on time for the party?… Choco-LATE!
  37. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Butter. Butter who? Butter open quick, I have a funny Halloween joke to tell you!
  38. Knock, Knock. Who’s there? Ivana. Ivana Who? Ivana suck your blood!
  39. Why didn’t the skeleton go to see a scary movie?… He didn’t have the guts.
  40. Why don’t mummies take vacations?… They’re afraid to unwind.
  41. What is a vampire’s favorite holiday, besides Halloween?… Fangs-giving!
  42. What does the skeleton chef say when he serves you a meal?… “Bone Appetit!”
  43. What do witches put on their bagels?… Scream cheese.
  44. What do ghosts eat for dinner?… Spook-ghetti!
  45. What do skeletons order at restaurants?… Spare ribs.
  46. What’s a ghost’s favorite yogurt flavor?… Boo-berry!
  47. Knock Knock! Who’s there? Hans. Hans who? Hans off my candy!
  48. Why did the headless horseman go into business?… He wanted to get ahead in life.
  49. What does a panda ghost eat?… Bam-BOO!
  50. Knock Knock! Who’s there? Fangs. Fangs who? Fangs for letting me in!
  51. Why did the Cyclops give up teaching? He only had one pupil!
  52. Knock Knock! Who’s there? Dishes! Dishes who? Dishes a very Halloween bad joke!
  53. Why did the ghost go into the bar?… For the Boos.