Top 50 State Jokes

by | Jun 20, 2019 | Education, Latest News, School Jokes | 0 comments

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  1. Alabama Jokes: Why is Alabama the smartest state?… Because it has 4 A’s and 1 B! (Back to School Jokes & Alabama Jokes for Kids)
  2. Alaska Jokes: What do you get from an Alaskan cow?…  Ice Cream! (Ice Cream Jokes)
  3. Arizona Jokes: What is the #1 drink in Phoenix?… Iced-T, Arizona Iced-T of course. (Iced Tea Jokes)
  4. Arkansas Jokes: Which state has the most pirates?… Arrrrrrrkansas. (Pirate Jokes)
  5. California Jokes: What happens when the smog lifts over Los Angeles?… UCLA.
  6. Colorado Jokes: What did the puny rock say to the big muscle rock?… I wish I were boulder!
  7. Connecticut Jokes:
  8. Delaware Jokes: What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware?…”Get in the boat, men!” (American Revolution Jokes)
  9. Florida Jokes: Why is it easy to get into Florida?… Because there are so many keys.
  10. Georgia Jokes: What is the most popular summer dessert for teachers in Georgia?… Peach pi. (Jokes for the Last Day of School)
  11. Hawaii Jokes: I burnt my Hawaiian pizza the other day.. I should have cooked it on aloha temperature. (Pizza Jokes)
  12. Idaho Jokes: What is Santa’s favorite place to deliver presents?… Idaho-ho-ho! (Christmas Jokes)
  13. Illinois Jokes: What is the loudest state in America?… Ill – i – NOISE!What is the loudest state in America?… Ill – i – NOISE!
  14. Indiana Jokes:
  15. Iowa Jokes: Who is the favorite TV character in Iowa?… Benjamin Franklin “Hawkeye” Pierce from MASH.
  16. Kansas Jokes: If Dorothy missed Kansas, what did Toto miss?… They missed the rains down in Africa. (Music Jokes / Movie Jokes / Rain Jokes / World Geography Jokes / Dog Jokes)
  17. Kentucky Jokes: I was surprised when a friend said he’ll work at KFC right after high school graduation.. Out of curiosity, I asked him why. All he said was, “It’s on my bucket list.” (Fast Food Jokes / Graduation Jokes / Chicken Jokes)
  18. Louisiana Jokes:
  19. Maine Jokes: What happened when a Maine fisherman was late to work?… She lobster job. (Lobster Jokes)
  20. Maryland Jokes: What’s the happiest state in the union?… Merry-land!
  21. Massachusetts Jokes: If April showers bring May flowers, what do Mayflowers bring?… Pilgrims (The Mayflower Ship) (Thanksgiving Day Joke for Kids)
  22. Michigan Jokes: What do you call someone from Detroit who talks a lot?… A Motor City mouth!
  23. Minnesota Jokes: Which state has the smallest drink?… Minnesota (Mini-soda)
  24. Mississippi Jokes: How long does it take to get from Louisiana to Alabama?… One Mississippi. (Louisiana Jokes & Mississippi Jokes)
  25. Missouri Jokes: Why were Missouri and Maine admitted as states at the same time?… Because Missouri loves company.
  26. Montana Jokes: Montana, where the elevation is usually a bigger number than the town’s population. (Hiking Jokes)
  27. Nebraska Jokes:
  28. Nevada Jokes: What did Lake Tahoe say to the shore?… Nothing, it waved. (15 Best Lakes in Nevada)
  29. New Hampshire Jokes:
  30. New Jersey Jokes: Where is the best place to shop for a hockey shirt?… New Jersey. (Geography Jokes for Kids & Hockey Jokes)
  31. New Mexico Jokes: New Mexico has TWO capitals. Can you name them?… “N” and “M”
  32. New York Jokes: Where do cows go on vacation?… Moo York. (Cow Jokes)
  33. North Carolina Jokes:
  34. North Dakota: North Dakota has TWO capitals. Can you name them?… “N” and “D”
  35. Ohio Jokes:
  36. Oklahoma Jokes: What is a tree’s favorite state?… “Oak” lahoma.
  37. Oregon Jokes: Prior to officially becoming a part of the United States, what was Oregon like?… It was very unOregonized.
  38. Pennsylvania Jokes: Which colonists told the most jokes?… Punsylvanians! (American Revolution Jokes & 4th of July Jokes)
  39. Rhode Island Jokes: “Welcome to Rhode Island! Enjoy it, because you’ll be through it in 40 minutes.”
  40. South Carolina Jokes: Two weevils grew up in South Carolina One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils
  41. South Dakota Jokes: If something goes wrong with the 4th of July celebration at Mt. Rushmore… It will be a monumental disaster. (4th of July Jokes)
  42. Tennessee Jokes: What did Tennessee see?… the same thing Arkansas.
  43. Texas Jokes:
  44. Utah Jokes:
  45. Vermont Jokes: Tourist: “Hey, buddy! Does this road go to Montpelier?” Vermont Native: “Nope. Stays right here.”Tourist: “No, I mean can I take this road to Montpelier?” Vermont Native: “Don’t think you can get it in your car.” Tourist: “Well, if I drive down this road, will I get to Montpelier?” Vermont Native: “Don’t know how good a driver you are.” Tourist: “You don’t know anything, do you?” Vermont Native: “I know I ain’t lost.” Tourist: “There’s not much between you and an idiot, is there?” Vermont Native: “Just this yard and that fence.”
  46. Virginia Jokes: Teacher: “Which son of old Virginia wrote the Declaration of Independence?” Student: “I think it was Thomas Jeffer’s son.” (American Revolution Jokes)
  47. Washington Jokes:
  48. West Virginia Jokes:
  49. Wisconsin Jokes: What is Rudolph’s favorite NBA basketball team?… The Milwaukee Bucks. (Christmas Jokes & Wisconsin Jokes)
  50. Wyoming Jokes: What state asks the most questions?… “Why” oming!
  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best jokes about .
  2. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about State?
  3. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good State knock-knock joke?
  4. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good State knock knock jokes? (June Jokes & Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
  5. What did Florida see?… The same thing Arkansas. (Top 50 State Jokes)
  6. It is in the news today that Florida is having its first remote trial via zoom… It looks like things will be settled out of court. (Lawyer Jokes)
  7. A retired Florida man was jailed for refusing to nap… …he was resisting a rest.
  8. What does the average Florida high school student get on his SAT?… Drool.
  9. Why do Florida students have TGIF on their shoes?… Toes Go In First!
  10. No, really. I’ve been holding my breath for someone in Florida to use their turn signal and I haven’t breathed since 2005.
  11. A Florida man was arrested for stealing a truck filled with $56,000 worth of Campbell’s soup. I, for one, hope this guy goes away for ‘Mmm, mmm, good!’
  12. Florida: America hates us because America ain’t us.
  13. A retired Florida man was jailed for refusing to nap… …he was resisting a rest.
  14. Florida: We’re not sure who is dumber – the politicians or the voters. (Election Jokes)
  15. How do you get a man in Floridian to do sit-ups?… Put the remote control between his toes.
  16. Nightmares in other states are just visions of what’s really going on in Florida.
  17. What does the average Florida State University student get on his SAT?… Drool.
  18. I’m absolutely disgusted with the state my life is in right now Florida. I live in Florida.
  19. Florida man fires gun at a retail store… It was a target.
  20. How many Florida State University freshman does it take to change a light bulb?… None, it’s a sophomore course.
  21. Why won’t any of Colorado’s bicycles stand up by themselves?… They are two tired.
  22. Why can’t Mt. Hood and Mt. Bachelor play hide and seek?… Because they like to peak. (Oregon Jokes & Ghost Jokes)
  23. How many Florida men do you need before you can make change for a dollar? You can’t. Nobody in Florida has any cents.
  24. The only difference between Florida and an oven is that an oven doesn’t produce serial killers.
  25. I went to Florida yesterday and a cop asked me if I have a criminal record… I said “No, is that still required?”
  27. A guy goes into a bar and asks the bartender if he wants to hear a good Alabama joke. The bartender says, “Before you tell it, you should know that I am 6-2 and weigh 225 and I’m from Alabama. See that guy at the end of the bar? He’s 6-4 and weighs 250 and he’s from Alabama, too. And see the guy at the other end of the bar? He’s 6-6 and weighs 280 and he’s from Alabama,too! Now, do you still want to tell your Alabama joke?” The guy says, “Nah.” To which the bartender smiles and says, “What’s the matter? Are ya chicken?” The guy says, “Nah. I just don’t want to have to explain it three times.”
  28. An Alabaman came home and found his house on fire, rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, “Hurry on over here. My house is on fire!” “OK,” replied the fireman, “how do we get there?” “Say, don’t you still have them big red trucks?”
  29. A tourist was walking around a Denver suburb and asked the shop owner, “What is the name of this town?” “Boulder,” he told me. So I stuck out my chest and shouted, “WHAT IS THE NAME OF THIS TOWN?!”
  30. State has TWO capitals. Can you name them?… “N” and “D”
  31. Whats the difference between Alabama and cheerios?… Nothing. They both belong in a bowl.
  32. What did Lake say to the shore?… Nothing, it waved. (15 Best Lakes in South Carolina)
  33. What is the tallest building in?… Public Library of course, it has the most stories! (Library Jokes)
  34. What goes hundreds of miles and never moves?… The Turnpike!
  35. Where do a fish keep their money?… In the riverbanks of the . (Ten Longest Rivers in North Dakota)
  36. What has a mouth but can’t eat?… The River!
  37. What runs but never goes out of breath?… The River! (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  38. If a plane crashed on the borders of where would they bury the survivors?… You wouldn’t bury them anywhere because survivors are the people who lived! (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  39. Teacher: Where were you born? Student: North Dakota. Teacher: Which part? Student: What do you mean, ‘which part’? My whole body was born in ! (Teacher Jokes)
  40. Did you hear the joke about Mountain?… You won’t get over it. (Hiking Jokes)
  41. Montana, where the elevation is usually a bigger number than the town’s population. (Hiking Jokes)
  42. A couple in Montana had a baby… Now their population is 17! (Baby Jokes)
  43. A cowboy and his blind horse: A man is casually crossing the Montana plains when his horse died all of the sudden. The nearest town was three days walk. So, he started to walk. 3 days later he ends up in this quiet ‘ol town but nobody had a horse for sale. So he commenced to walking to the closest town which was a two days journey. Unfortunately, nobody in that town had a horse for sale, however, he did come across this stable where the fellow runnin’ it mentioned his brother in a nearby Town had a horse for sale. He commenced to walk to this next town and 2 DAYS LATER found the guy’s brother. “I talked to your brother two days walk from here and he says you might have a horse to sell me.” “Yes I do have a horse for sale,” He replied, “But he don’t look so good.” “I don’t care. I’ll take him anyways. I’ve been walking for damn near a week now. I’m tired and I need a horse.” So he gets on the horse and the horse takes off and bumps into a tree and stops. “Heyyy, something’s wrong with this horse. I think he’s blind. YOU SOLD ME A BLIND HORSE MISTER!” “I told you Sir, THE HORSE DON’T LOOK SO GOOD!”
  44. Tourist: “Lived in this town all your life?” Resident: “No, not yet.”
  45. Tourist: “Nice little town — so old and quaint. Must be a lot of odd characters around here, though, right?” Resident: “Oh yes, quite a few. You see ’em around. But they’re mostly gone after Labor Day.” (Labor Day Jokes & Travel Blogs)
  46. Where do [state] elementary school sports teams buy their uniforms?… New Jersey? (Elementary School Jokes)
  47. Where do [state] middle school sports teams buy their uniforms?… New Jersey? (Middle School Jokes)
  48. Where do [state] high school sports teams buy their uniforms?… New Jersey? (High School Jokes)
  49. Why did the [state] teacher jump into the pool?… She wanted to test the water! (Teacher Jokes & Swimming Jokes for Kids)
  50. Why did the [state] teacher jump into the lake?… She wanted to test the water! (Teacher Jokes & Swimming Jokes for Kids)
  51. Why did the [state] teacher jump into the ocean?… She wanted to test the water! (Teacher Jokes & Ocean Jokes)
  52. Why did the [state] teacher jump into the river?… She wanted to test the water! (Teacher Jokes & Swimming Jokes for Kids)
  53. What did [state] see?… the same thing Arkansas.
  54. What did the California flag say to the American flag?… Nothing. It waved!
  55. Hawaii is hosting a party for all the states. Hawaii says, “be there or be square!” Unfortunately, Colorado and Wyoming didn’t attend. (Wyoming Jokes & Colorado Jokes)