101 Cat Jokes

by | Mar 4, 2023 | Dads, Latest News, Moms, School Jokes

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  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best cat jokes.
  2. Where do cats go for their prom?… The fur ball. (Prom Jokes)
  3. What do you call a feline with a short haircut?… A Bob Cat. (Barber Jokes)
  4. What’s black and white and read all over?… The Cat in the Hat. (Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  5. What is the cat ‘s favorite cereal?… Mice Krispies. (Cereal Jokes)
  6. Why was the cat afraid of the tree?… Because of its bark. (Dog Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  7. Optimists: The glass is half full. Pessimists: The glass is half empty. Cat owners: The glass is knocked over.
  8. A mother mouse and a baby mouse are walking along when suddenly a cat attacks them. The mother mouse shouts “BARK!” and the cat runs away. “See?” the mother mouse says to her baby. “Now do you see why it’s important to learn a foreign language?” (Funny Animal Jokes for Kids & Mother’s Day Jokes)
  9. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite school subject?… HISStory. (Dr. Seuss Jokes & Social Studies Jokes)
  10. What does a cat do when he gets mad?… He has a hissy fit.
  11. What do you get when you cross a tabby cat with a lemon tree?… A sour puss. (Tree Jokes)
  12. McGonagall is a good teacher, but… she has a tendency to be catty. (Harry Potter Jokes & Jokes for Teachers)
  13. What is the name of the cat who said, “The British are coming! The British are coming!”?… Paw Revere. (American Revolution Jokes)
  14. How do French cats say “Thank You”?… Meow-ci Beaucoup. (Bastille Day Jokes)
  15. Why are kittens actually excellent bosses?… They have great littership.
  16. I saw a poster today that asked, “Have you seen my cat?” So, I called the number and said that I didn’t. I like to help where I can.
  17. The witches’ black cat fell off the broom while flying… it was cat-astrophic. (Witch Jokes)
  18. What Dr. Seuss baseball book was never published?… “The Cat at Bat!” (101 Baseball Jokes & Book Jokes)
  19. My cat hates tacos… she prefers to eat purr-itos. (Taco Jokes & Cinco De Mayo Jokes)
  20. What is the cat’s favorite show on TV?… The evening mews. (Cat Jokes)
  21. The cops arrested a black cat on Friday the 13th… they said she was a purr-patrator. (Friday the 13th Jokes)
  22. Where does the Cat in the Hat go when he’s sick?… To Dr. Seuss. (Dr. Seuss Jokes & Doctor Jokes)
  23. What does a cat read with coffee in the morning?… The mewspaper. (Cat Jokes)
  24. What does a cat wear when he sleeps?… paw-jamas! (Cat Jokes & Napping Jokes)
  25. What is the difference between a black cat and a frog?… They say a black cat has nine lives, and the frog croaks every night. (Cat Jokes & Frog Jokes)
  26. What was the kitten bowling league called?… Alley Cats.
  27. What do you call the cat that was caught by the police? The purr-petrator.
  28. What kind of musician is a cat ?… A purr-cussionist. (Music Jokes)
  29. What is the difference between a comma and the Cat in the Hat?… One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause. (Grammar Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  30. When is it considered unlucky to see a black cat?… When you are a mouse.
  31. Why did the cat put the letter “M” into the freezer?… To turn “ice” into “mice” (Cat Jokes & Ice Cream Jokes)
  32. How are pumpkins like cats?… They’re often waiting on the porch for you when you get home. (Pumpkin Jokes)
  33. Why was the black cat having a concert on Friday the 13th?… Because she was very meow-sical. (Friday the 13th Jokes)
  34. If lights run on electricity and buses run on gas, what does a cat run on?… His paws.
  35. At the Friday 13th dance party, the black cat saw her rival fish and said, “I have a bone to pick with you.”
  36. What grade did the cat do on his math test?… A Purrrr-fect score! (Math Jokes for Kids & Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  37. While trying a new magic spell, the witch crossed a black cat and an oak tree… The result was a black and white cat-a-log’ue. (Cat Jokes / Witch Jokes / Tree Jokes)
  38. To break the stigma surrounding black cats being a bad omen, the cat joined the red cross society and became a first aid kit-ten and started helping mankind.
  39. What is the difference between a comma and a cat?… One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause. (Grammar Jokes)
  40. What does a cat use to make his coffee?… A purr-colator. (Cat Jokes & Coffee Jokes)
  41. What is a cat’s favorite birthday party game?… Mews-ical chairs. (Birthday Jokes)
  42. Why did the cat want to be friends with the fish?… He thought it was a cat fish. (Cat Jokes & Fish Jokes)
  43. Why is a cat so good at video games?… Because he starts with nine lives!
  44. The black cat wore her favorite dress for the costume party on Friday 13th… She wore a purrr-ple gown.
  45. What is a black cat’s favorite game?… Hide and shriek!
  46. What normally happens when kitties go on a first date?… They hiss.
  47. What was the special offer at the pet store this week?… Buy 1 Cat get 1 Flea!
  48. What do you need to get a fast cat to use the litter box?… Quicksand.
  49. What do you call a cat that can address the media?… a Press Kit.
  50. What does the cat say after making a joke?… “Just kitten!”
  51. What happens when it rains cats and dogs?… You have to been careful not to step in a poodle. (Rain Jokes & Dog Jokes)
  52. Why did the cats ask for a drum set?… They wanted to make some mewsic!
  53. What’s a cat’s favorite TV show?… Claw and Order.
  54. Why is it hard to trust cats?… They have many tall tails.
  55. How did the mom cat know she was pregnant?… Her test was pawsitive.
  56. How did the cat know he had Covid?… Her test was pawsitive.
  57. What animals can you not trust?… Big cats! Because some are cheetahs, and some are always lion!
  58. What do polite cats say when they’re in the way?… Paw-don me! I’m furry sorry.
  59. Why are kittens actually excellent bosses?… They have great littership.
  60. Patient: Crying One minute he loves me and the next he wants nothing to do me! Therapist: That’s pretty typical cat behaviour
  61. Why was the black cat feeling grouchy on the 13th of Friday?… She was in a very bad meowd.
  62. What did the black cat say to the construction worker on Friday The 13th?… It’s fine if you avoid stepping under that ladder. I plan on crossing your path in a minute. (Friday the 13th Jokes)
  63. How was the black cat feeling on Friday the 13th?… Purr-fectly happy. (Friday the 13th Jokes)
  64. On Friday the 13th, the black cat did all her laundry and hung them on a fe-line to dry. (Cat Jokes)
  65. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about cats?
  66. What does a cat fill his pancakes with?… Mice cream! (Cat Jokes & Ice Cream Jokes)
  67. I wrapped my cat in a blanket… Now she’s a purrito.
  68. What do you call a painting of a cat?… A paw-trait.
  69. What do you get when you dip a kitten in chocolate?… A Kitty Kat bar! (Candy Jokes)
  70. What is a cat’s favorite brand of sneaker?… Mew Balance. (Track and Field Jokes)
  71. What is the title of the autobiography of the cat … Hiss and Tell. (Book Jokes)
  72. What is the a cat’s favorite cereal?… Mice Krispies. (Cereal Jokes)
  73. What is a the cat’s favorite brand of car?… The Catillac. (Car Jokes)
  74. What color does a cat like the most?… Purrr-ple.
  75. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite song?… Three Blind Mice! ((Music Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  76. What is the Cat in the Hat ‘s favorite cereal?… Mice Krispies. (Cereal Jokes)
  77. What color does the Cat in the Hat like the most?… Purrr-ple.
  78. Why did the Cat in the Hat put the letter “M” into the freezer?… To turn “ice” into “mice” (Cat Jokes & Ice Cream Jokes)
  79. What is smarter than a talking cat?… A spelling bee! (Bee Jokes / 26 Lessons for the Letter of the Week A- Z)
  80. What do you call a cat on ice?… One cool cat.
  81. What do you call a cat in a station wagon?… A car-pet!
  82. What is a cats favorite musical instrument?… Purr-cussion.
  83. Why is the Cat in the Hat such a good piano player?… Because they’re very mewsical. (Cat Jokes & Music Jokes)
  84. What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo?… An eskimew!
  85. What is a cat’s favorite book?… The prince and the paw-purr.
  86. What’s the first thing you say to a cat?… HELLO KITTY!
  87. What do you call the cat when he’s walking on snow?… A cool cat. (Cat Jokes & Winter Jokes)
  88. Which vegetable does a cat like the most?… As-purr-agus.
  89. What does a cat call a hummingbird?… Fast food. (Fast Food Jokes & Bird Jokes)
  90. Why is a cat such a good piano player?… Because they’re very mewsical. (Cat Jokes & Music Jokes)
  91. What is a cat’s favorite song?… Three Blind Mice! ((Music Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  92. Why was the cat so crabby?… He was in a bad mewd. (Cat Jokes)
  93. What did the cats do when they realized they had a bad plan?… They decided to (cat)nip it in the bud.
  94. Why did the cat run away from the tree?… It was afraid of the bark! (Cat Jokes & Tree Jokes)
  95. What do you call when he wears winter shoes?… Puss in boots. (Cat Jokes & Winter Jokes)
  96. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite musical?… The Sound of Mewsic. (Cat Jokes & Music Jokes)
  97. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good cat knock knock jokes? (June Jokes & Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
  98. What kind of yard work does a cat like the most?… Meowing the lawn. (Cat Jokes & Summer Jokes)
  99. What grade did the cat in the Hat get on his english test?… A Purrrr-fect score! (Math Jokes for Kids & Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  100. What cat said, “The British are coming! The British are coming!”?… Paw Revere. (American Revolution Jokes)
  101. What grade did the cat in the Hat get on his science test?… A Purrrr-fect score! (Math Jokes for Kids & Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  102. Why did the cat want to be friends with the fish?… He thought it was a cat fish. (Cat Jokes & Fish Jokes)
  103. What grade did the cat in the Hat get on his physics test?… A Purrrr-fect score! (Math Jokes for Kids & Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  104. What do you get if you cross a cat with Father Christmas?… Santa Claws! (Christmas Jokes)
  105. What grade did the cat in the Hat get on his French test?… A Purrrr-fect score! (Math Jokes for Kids & Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  106. What’s the difference between a cat and a frog?… A Cat has nine lives but a Frog croaks every night! (Frog Jokes)
  107. What is the cat’s favorite school subject?… HISStory. (Dr. Seuss Jokes & Social Studies Jokes)
  108. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good cat knock-knock joke?
  109. If lights run on electricity and buses run on gas, what does the cat run on?… His paws.
  110. Why was the cat so small?… Because it only ate condensed milk! (Milk Jokes)
  111. Did you hear about the cat that thought she was a dog?… She was purr-plexed. (Dog Jokes)
  112. What does the Cat in the Hat use to keep his grass trimmed?… A lawn meower. (Cat Jokes & Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  113. Why do so many people love the Cat in the Hat?… They think he’s purrrr-fect. (Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  114. Why doesn’t the Cat in the Hat know about this?… Because he only knows a lot about that! (Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  115. What did one cat say to the other cat on Valentine’s Day?… Don’t ever change, you’re purrrfect. (Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes)
  116. Why did the cat have to go to an accountant?… They got caught up in a purramid scheme.
  117. Which cat discovered America?… Christofurry Columbus (Columbus Day Jokes & Thanksgiving Jokes)
  118. What message is on candy hearts for cats?… “You’re purr-fect!” (Candy Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  119. What did the girl cat say to the boy cat on Valentine’s Day?… You’re purrr-fect for me. (Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes)
  120. When cats need to go to the airport, who do they call?… A tabby.
  121. What’s a cat’s favorite button on the tv remote?… Paws.
  122. Octopus: [holding a gun in each hand] Cat: you’re one short pal. (Octopus Jokes)
  123. Where did the school kittens go for their field trip?… To the mewseum. (Field Trip Jokes for Kids)
  124. Son to mother after 1st day of school. “Nothing exciting happened except the teacher didn’t know how to spell cat, so I told her.” (Back to School Jokes & Grammar Jokes)
  125. Why did the cat join the Red Cross?… Because she wanted to be a first-aid kit!
  126. What is it called when a cat wins a dog show?… A CAT-HAS-TROPHY! (Dog Jokes)
  127. Why was the cat afraid of the tree?… Because of its bark! (Dog Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  128. What is the cat’s favorite TV show?… The evening mews!
  129. Why are cats so good at video games?… Because they have nine lives!
  130. What time is it when ten cats chase a mouse?… Ten After One.
  131. Where does the Cat in the Hat go when he’s sick?… To Dr. Seuss. (Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  132. What do you call a cat on Christmas Eve?… Sandy Claws. (Christmas Eve Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  133. What is the difference between a comma and the Cat in the Hat?… One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause. (Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  134. What does a cat like to eat on his birthday?… Mice cream and cake! (Birthday Jokes for Kids & Ice Cream Jokes)
  135. Remember, you don’t OWN a cat… You know a cat.
  136. Why don’t you want to play games with a cat?… They tend to be cheetahs.
  137. Why did the cat wear a top hat?… Beclaws he was feline sassy
  138. What do cats like to eat on sunny days?… Mice cream cones! (Ice Cream Jokes)
  139. What do you call a cat that smells good?… prrrr-fume.
  140. What title does a cat go by in the kitchen?… The Whisker.
  141. Did you hear about the cat who wanted to learn how to bark?… Curiousity killed the cat.
  142. How is cat food sold?… Usually purr can!
  143. What do you call a cat on a summer camp field trip to the beach?…. Sandy claws. (Summer Camp Jokes for Kids / Christmas Jokes / Cat Jokes)
  144. What is a cat’s favorite color?… Purrrple!
  145. Did you know that cats designed the great pyramids of Giza?… It was all drawn out on paw-pyrus. (World Geography)
  146. What do you call a cat who became a doctor?… A first-aid kitten.
  147. What do you call a cat who became a nurser?… A first-aid kitten.
  148. What do you call a cat who became a EMT?… A first-aid kitten.
  149. What do cats look for in a significant other?… A great purrsonality.
  150. What do you get when you cross a black cat with a lemon?…. sour-puss (Halloween Jokes)
  151. What do you call a cat that gets anything it wants?… Purrr-suasive.
  152. Do you want to hear a bad cat joke?’.. Just kitten.
  153. What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time?… Sandy Claws! (Top Holiday Jokes / Top Winter Jokes / Christmas Trivia)
  154. What did the mom cat say about her intuition?… “I just had a strong feline.”
  155. Before a cat fight, what is usually said?… “Hold my purrse.”
  156. Why did the cat get pulled over by the police?… Because it “littered.” (Police Jokes)
  157. What do you call a cat with eight legs that likes to swim?… An octopuss! (Octopus Jokes)
  158. Why don’t cats like online Christmas shopping?… They prefer a cat-alogue. (Top Holiday Jokes / Top Winter Jokes/ Christmas Trivia)
  159. What do you call a cat that can put together furniture from Ikea?… an Assembly kit.
  160. Who did cats vote for in November 2106?… Hillary Kitten. (Top Presidential Jokes)
  161. There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?… None, because they were copycats!
  162. Who is the leader of the Kitty Communist Party?… Chairman Meow.
  163. What do you call the cat that was caught by the police?… the purrpatrator.
  164. What did the alien say to the cat?… Take me to your litter. (Top Astronomy Jokes)
  165. What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?… Kitty Perry! (Horse Jokes)
  166. What do call a cat in a blanket?… A purrrrito!
  167. When a cat doesn’t want to say goodbye, what do they say instead?… “See ya litter!”
  168. Why did the cat put the letter “M” into the fridge?… Because it turns “ice” into “mice!” (Top Winter Jokes)
  169. What happened when the lion ate the comedian?… He felt funny! (Lion Jokes)
  170. What do you get if you cross a leopard with a watchdog?… A terrified postman! (Dog Jokes and Mailman Jokes)
  171. What do you call a flying cat?… I’m-paws-sible. (Pilot Jokes)
  172. What did the cat say when he lost all his money?… I’m paw!
  173. Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of yarn?… She had a litter of mittens. (Winter Jokes)
  174. What do you call a lion who has eaten your mother’s sister?… An aunt-eater! (Lion Jokes)
  175. Why shouldn’t you kidnap the kitten?… Because curiousity killed the cat burglar.
  176. What do tigers wear in bed?… Stripey pyjamas! (Napping Jokes)
  177. Why did the cat wear a dress?… She was feline fine.
  178. Why was the cat sitting on the computer?… To keep an eye on the mouse! (Computer Jokes)
  179. What did the cat say when he lost his Christmas toys?… You got to be kitten me. (Top Holiday Jokes / Top Winter Jokes / Christmas Trivia)
  180. What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangaroo?… A stripey jumper!
  181. What do you get if you cross a cat with a bottle of vinegar?… A sourpuss!
  182. How are tigers like sergeants in the army?… They both wear stripes! (Veterans Day Jokes)
  183. What does the Cat in the Hat read in the morning?… The mewspaper. (Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  184. How does the Cat in the Hat sing scales?… Do-ri-me-ow. (Dr. Seuss Jokes & Music Jokes)
  185. What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep?… A stripey sweater! (Sheep Jokes)
  186. Why is the desert lion everyone’s favorite at Christmas?… Because he has sandy claws! (Top Holiday Jokes / Top Winter Jokes / Christmas Trivia)
  187. How does a lion greet the other animals in the field?… ‘Pleased to eat you.’! (Lion Jokes)
  188. What do you get if you cross a tiger with a snowman?… Frostbite! (Top Holiday Jokes / Top Winter Jokes / Christmas Trivia)
  189. What is a French cat’s favorite pudding?… Chocolate mousse!
  190. What looks like half a cat?… The other half!
  191. What was the name of the film about a killer lion that swam underwater?…  ‘Claws.’ (Top Summer Jokes & Lion Jokes)
  192. If a four-legged animal is a quadruped and a two-legged animal is a biped, What’s a tiger?… A stri-ped!
  193. What do you call a cat that wears make up?… Glamourpuss.
  194. What do cats like to read?… Cat-alogues!
  195. What kind of sports car does a cat drive?… A Furrari. (Sports Joke of the Day) (Car Jokes)
  196. What do you call a cat who just ate a duck?… a duck-filled platy puss. (Duck Jokes)
  197. What did the lions say to his cubs when he taught them to hunt?… ‘Don’t go over the road till you see the zebra crossing.’
  198. What’s striped and bouncy?… A tiger on a pogo stick!
  199. What is a cat’s favorite dance move?… The Purr-colator. (Coffee Day Jokes)
  200. Why was the cat scared of the tree?… Because of its bark. (Top Arbor Day Jokes)
  201. What do you feed an invisible cat?… Evaporated milk.
  202. What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?… Hailing taxi cabs! (Dog Jokes)
  203. What flies around your light at night and can bite off your head?… A tiger moth!
  204. What does the lion say to his friends before they go out hunting for food?… ‘Let us prey.’ (Lion Jokes)
  205. What’s the unluckiest kind of cat to have?… A catastrophe!
  206. Who was the most powerful cat in China?… Chairman Miaow! (World Geography Jokes)
  207. What do you get if you cross a cat with a tree?… A cat-a-logue! (Top Arbor Day Jokes) Tree Jokes)
  208. What do you call a cat race?… A meowathon. (Sports Joke of the Day)
  209. When the cat’s away?… The house smells better!
  210. Why did the kitty get an “A” on their English assignment?… They properly used an independent claws.
  211. Before going after a mouse, what did the dad cat say to his family?… “Let us prey.”
  212. What is a cat’s favorite vegetable?… As-purr-agus.
  213. What do you call it when a cat is super-stylish?… Haute-cat-ture.
  214. Did you hear about the passenger who had to be escorted off the airplane?… She let the cat out of the bag. (Pilot Jokes)
  215. What do cats look for in a significant other? A great purrsonality. 28. What do you call a cat who became a doctor? A first-aid kitten. Related: 101 Riddles for Kids 29. What did the mom cat say about her intuition? “I just had a strong feline.” 30. Why was the teenage cat sent to his room? He was in a bad meowd.
  216. What made the cat upgrade his phone?… He wanted to finally get pawtrait mode.
  217. What do cats call a big pile of laundry? A meowtain to climb. 33. Why did the cat avoid eating lemons? They made him a sour-puss. 34. What song do kittens always request at dances? “Mice Mice Baby.” 35. Why are cats bad at making decisions? They become so purrplexed. 36. What’s a cat’s favorite sport? Hairball. Related: 101 Corny Jokes 37. Why do cats hate laptops? They don’t have a mouse. 38. How did one cat break up with another? She said, “We’re hisstory!” 39. Why don’t cats ever say “YOLO”? They have nine lives.
  218. Which day of the week do cats love the most? Caturday.
  219. Why do cats make horrible DJs?… They always paws the tunes.
  220. What did the mom and dad cat say about their wedding day?… “It was unfurrgetable!”
  221. What’s a kitten’s fave way to shop? By cat-alogue.
  222. How did the cat comic know he was funny? The audience was meow-ling with laughter.
  223. Why was the animal lover so untrustworthy? She kept letting the cat out of the bag!
  224. What do cats call a nice dinner? A fancy feast.
  225. What did the sick cat say? “I feel clawful!”
  226. Why did some cat friends go to the mall? There was a buy-one-get-one-furry deal.
  227. Where do cats enjoy spending a family day? The mew-seum.
  228. What’s a kitten’s favorite kind of sticker? Scratch and sniff.
  229. What did one cat say while her friend was complaining? “Tail me about it.”
  230. What do you call a cat that doesn’t use the litter box?… A pet project.
  231. What did the kitten have at their birthday party?… A pounce house.
  232. What does a choir of cats like to sing?… “Do-Re-Mew.”
  233. What kind of car does a fat cat drive?… a Catillac! (Car Jokes)
  234. What do you call Long John Silver when he has a cat on his shoulder?… A purr-ate! (Pirate Jokes)
  235. What is a cats favorite kitchen tool?…  The “whisker”
  236. What did the cat say to the dog?… Check meow-t!
  237. What do cats wear at night?… paw-jamas!
  238. What do you call a cat that does tricks?… A magic kit.
  239. What do you call a cat when it is huge?… A MEOW-SIVE CAT
  240. Why did the cat go to the river?… Claws it wanted to.
  241. What does a cat say when somebody steps on its tail?… Me-ow!
  242. Did you hear about the cat that climbed the Himilayas?… She was a sher-paw.
  243. Why did the cat cross the road?… It was the chicken’s day off!
  244. Where does a cat go when he looses his tail?… The retail store!
  245. What do you call a cat that can rough the great outdoors?… A survival kit.
  246. What do you call a pile of kittens?…  a meowntain
  247. What does Christmas have to do with a cat lost in the desert?… They both have sandy claws.
  248. How does the cat get what he wants?… With purr-suasion. (Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  249. What job did a cat have at the circus?… Acrocat. (Circus Jokes)
  250. How do you make cats furry?… The spin cycle.
  251. What’s a kitten’s favorite kind of sticker?… Scratch and sniff!
  252. What’s a kitten’s favorite kind of book?… Scratch and sniff!
  253. What is lion’s favorite food?… Baked beings! (Lion Jokes)
  254. Why did the cat avoid eating lemons?… They made him a sour-puss.
  255. Somewhere there is a house cat that did more than I did today. Kristeen von Hagen, comedian