101 Tree Jokes

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More Tree Jokes…

Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best jokes about trees.
A lumberjack went into a magic forest to cut a tree. Upon arrival, he started to swing at the tree. It shouted, “Wait! I’m a talking tree!” The lumberjack smiled, “and you will dialogue.” (Smile Jokes)
Did you hear the joke about the oak tree?… It’s acorny one!
Where do saplings go to learn?… Elementree school.
What is the saddest tree?… The weeping willow.
Spring is here, and the trees are getting their foliage back… What a releaf! (Spring Jokes)
If money really did grow on trees, what would be everyone’s favorite season?… Fall. (Tree Jokes)
What is a tree’s favorite state?… “Oak” lahoma. (Oklahoma Jokes)
Hawaii Puns: Keep palm and carry on. (Hawaii Jokes)
How can you identify a dogwood tree?… By its bark!
How does a coniferous tree get ready for a date?… They spruce themselves up.
What is a pine tree’s favorite singer?… Spruce Springsteen.
What’s the best way to make a tree laugh?… Tell it acorn-y joke.
How does a coniferous tree get ready for a prom?… They spruce themselves up.
How does a coniferous tree get ready for a wedding?… They spruce themselves up.
What did the tree say to the bully?… Leaf me alone!
What must trees drink responsibly?… Root beer.
Why do Christmas trees have trouble sewing?… They can’t stop dropping their needles!
I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn’t hack it… so they gave me the axe. (Labor Day Jokes)
What is a tree’s least favorite month?… Sep-timber! (Funny Jokes for Each Month)
Mother to son: I’m warning you. If you fall out of that tree and break both your legs, don’t come running to me! (Biology Jokes for Kids & Mother’s Day Jokes)
What’s a tree’s favorite subject in school?… Geometree!
Why did the tree get in trouble at school?… For being knotty!
Would you ever try the acorn diet?… No way! It sounds nuts!
Which Canadian city is a tree’s favorite?… Mon “tree” al!
What did Obi Wan Kenobi say to the tree?… May the Forest be with you. (Star Wars Jokes for Kids)
Did you hear the joke about the redwood?… It’s tree-mendous!
What was General Washington’s favorite tree?… The infan-tree. (American Revolution Jokes & Arbor Day Jokes)
What is a tree’s favorite drink?… Root beer. (Camping Jokes for Kids)
Why do trees have so many friends?… They branch out. (Camping Jokes for Kids)
What kind of tree does a math teacher climb?… Geometry. (Geometry Jokes & Arbor Day Jokes)
What is a pirate’s favorite holiday?… AHRRRRR-bor Day! (Pirate Jokes for Kids)
What type of tree likes to give high fives?… A palm tree!
Why did the tree need to take a nap?… For rest.
What’s a tree’s favorite radio station?… One that plays poplar songs!
Do you want a brief explanation of an acorn?… In a nutshell, it’s an oak tree.
What band do trees listen to on the 4th of July?… Spruce Springsteen and the Tree Street Band. (Music Jokes & 4th of July Jokes)
What do you call a military tree who doesn’t return on time?… Absent without leaf.
What’s a tree’s favorite dating app?… Timber.
What was the tree’s favorite thing about Star Trek?… The Captain’s log.
What did one leaf say to another?… I’m falling for you. (Valentine’s Day Jokes & Fall Jokes)
How do trees get on the internet?… They log in. (Computer Jokes for Kids)
If you’re in the woods, how can you tell if a tree is a dogwood?… By its bark. (Dog Jokes for Kids)
What did the tree do when the bank closed?… It opened its own branch!
Why was the pine tree sent to its room?… Because it was being knotty!
What did Frodo say when he saw the trees dancing?… That’s ENT-ertainment! (Tree Jokes & Dance Jokes)
Who’s going to agree to play Frodo in the Lord of the Rings movies?… Elijah Would. (Movie Jokes & 101 Lord of the Rings Jokes)
What did the hurricane say to the palm tree?… Hang onto your leaves, this will be no ordinary breeze. (Hurricane Jokes)
What kind of trees do you get when you plant kisses?… Tulips.
Why isn’t the squirrel hard at work collecting acorns at the oak tree?… She called in sick and went to the beech.
What happens if the ground log sees its shadow?… We’ll have six more weeks of splinters! (Groundhog Day Jokes)
Why did you give the tree some aspirin?… Because I heard it was a sycamore! (Doctor Jokes for Kids)
What song do trees HATE!… Timber by Pit Bull & Kesha. (Tree Jokes & Music Jokes)
How do leaves get from place to place?… With autumn-mobiles. (Fall Jokes & Car Jokes)
What’s an elephant’s favorite part of a tree?… The trunk! (Elephant Jokes)
The teacher asked little Johhny, “George Washington not only chopped down his father’s Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn’t punish him?” Little Johnny replied, “Because he still had the axe in his hand.” (Presidents Day Jokes)
Why do Platanus occidentalis have to see the doctor more than any other trees?… Because they are sycamore.
What did the tree say after he made an offer?… Take it or leaf it.
What kind of plant grows on your hand?… Palm tree.
Why did the boy climb up the tree with a hockey stick… Cause he wanted to join the maple leafs. (Hockey Jokes & Canada Day Jokes)
What happened to the wooden car with wooden wheels and a wooden engine?… It wooden go.
Why are trees the best networkers?… They’re constantly branching out!
Why did the tree get stumped?… It couldn’t get to the root of the problem!
Did you hear about the tree that had to take time off of work in autumn?… It was on paid leaf. (Fall Jokes for Kids)
What happens to trees on Valentine’s Day?… They get sappy!
What kind of tree is often found in the kitchen?… A pantry!
What is your favorite type of tree?… A pastry!
Why do trees hate tests?… Because they get stumped by the questions.
What is every single tree’s least favorite month?… SepTIMMMBERRR!
Why was the weeping willow so sad?… It watched a sappy movie.
What did the beaver say to the tree?… “It’s been nice gnawing you!” (Tree Jokes for Kids)
What falls in autumn?… Leaves! (Fall Jokes & Tree Jokes)
Masters Hole 6: What a favorite golf hole of an arborist?… Juniper. (Masters Golf Jokes)
What did the tree wear to the pool party?… Swimming trunks! (Summer Jokes for Kids & Swimming Jokes)
Did you hear the joke about tree?… It’ll leaf you laughing! (Fall Jokes for Kids)
What do elephants and trees have in common?… They both have big trunks! (Elephant Jokes)
How do campfires access the internet at summer camp?… They log in. (Computer Jokes)
What did the beaver say to the tree at the summer camp?… Been nice gnawing you. (Summer Camp Jokes)
What do you call a tree that doubts autumn?… Disbe-leaf. (Fall Jokes for Kids)
Winter can be pretty dreary with all the bare trees… so when spring comes it’s such a re-leaf. (Tree Jokes & Winter Jokes)
How do two rival forests get along?… They sign a peace tree-ty
What type of fish falls from trees?… Jel-leaf-ish.
Why do trees hate riddles?… Because it’s too easy to get stumped!
Dancing trees?… Now that’s ENT-ertainment. (Lord of the Rings Jokes)
Masters Hole #2 What do you get if you combine a fashion designer, dog lover, and lumberjack?… Pink Dogwood. (Dog Jokes & Masters Golf Jokes)
How do trees make themselves heard?… Amp-leaf-ication.
What’s another name for an artificial Christmas tree?… Faux fir.
What’s the difference between weather and climate?… You can’t weather a tree, but you can climate.
Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about trees?
Why didn’t George Washington’s father yell at him for chopping down the cherry tree?… Because George was still holding the axe…
Why was the tree arrested?… For shopleafting.
How did the apple tree get the job?… It had the right qua-leaf-ications.
Why couldn’t the fig tree get back in shape?… It couldn’t stick to a root-ine.
Why was the tree drooling?… It was a dogwood. (Dog Jokes for Kids)
Why didn’t the dendrochronologist get married?… He only ever dated trees. (Environment Jokes)
Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good tree knock-knock joke?
What did the little tree say to the big tree? — Leaf me alone!
What did the pirate say when his wooden leg got stuck in the freezer?… Shiver me timbers! (Pirate Jokes)
Why did the Cat in the Hat run away from the tree?… It was afraid of the bark! (Cat Jokes & Tree Jokes)
Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good tree knock knock jokes? (June Jokes & Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
How did the tree get lost?… It took the wrong root.
Why do you never want to invite a tree to your party?… Because they never leaf when you want them to.
If fruit comes from a fruit tree, where does turkey come from?… A poul-tree! (Arbor Day Jokes) (Turkey Jokes & Tree Jokes)
How do you know when a tree doesn’t know the answer to something?… It shrubs.
Which flowering plant is a champion equestrian?… The horse chestnut.
Why can’t the lonely evergreen stop thinking about high school?… She’s still pining to be one of the poplar kids.
What did the beaver say to the maple tree?… It’s been nice gnawing you. (Canada Day Jokes)
Why were so many people sitting under the tree?… It was poplar.
My best friend says I can’t go skateboarding with a broken bone…. But I’m going out on a limb and do it anyway. (Skateboarding Jokes & Doctor Jokes)
What did the teaching tree do when it went overseas?… It took a leaf of absence.
While trying a new magic spell, the witch crossed a black cat and an oak tree… The result was a black and white cat-a-log’ue. (Cat Jokes / Witch Jokes / Tree Jokes)
What was wrong with the tree’s car?… It wooden go!
Did you hear the one about the oak tree?… It’s a corn-y one!
A snare drum and a crash symbol fell out of a tree… BA-DUM TSSSHH
Why did you plant a board and nails on Arbor Day?… I was trying to grow a tree house!
What happened when the warg tried to bite Treebeard?… He found his fang gorn! (101 Lord of the Rings Jokes)
What do you get when you cross a tree with an artificial waterway?… A root canal.
What kind of plant grows on your hand?… Palm tree. (Tree Jokes & Biology Jokes)
Why did the leaf go to the doctor?… It was feeling green. (Earth Day & Doctor Jokes)
What did a tree fighting with autumn say?… That’s it, I’m leaving. (Tree Jokes & Boxing Jokes)
What did the tree say after a long winter?… What a re-leaf. (Winter Jokes)
How do you get down from a tree?… You don’t. Down comes from a duck.
Where does Avogadro plant his trees?… moles in the ground. (Mole Day Jokes)
What did the tree say to spring?… What a re-leaf. (Spring Jokes)
What emotion does a tree feel every spring?… Relief. (Spring Jokes)
What do you call a whole day planting trees?… Arbore Day.
Did you hear about the big corporation that’s making syrup from supposedly contaminated trees?… They maple their brand off the shelves.
Would you ever consider going on the almond tree diet?… No way, that’s just nuts!
What happens when a tree falls into mud?… It leafs an impression.
What did Obi Wan Kenobi say to the tree?… May the Forest be with you. (Star Wars Jokes for Kids)
Where do birch trees keep their valuables?… In a river bank.
What did the tree say to autumn?… Leave me alone.(Fall Jokes for Kids)
Why are trees very forgiving?… Because in the Fall they “Let It Go” and in the Spring they “turn over a new leaf.” (Spring Jokes & Fall Jokes)
What happens to maple trees on Valentine’s Day?… They get sappy.
What do you call the world’s sleepiest tree?… Mesnoozelah!
Why are leaves always involved in risky business?… Because they constantly have to go out on a limb.
Why don’t you ever see hippos hiding in trees?… Because they’re really good at it!
What did the rock say when it rolled into the tree?… Nothing. Rocks don’t talk!
How do you know when a tree has had too much root beer?… He won’t stop texting his ax!
Why do trees make the worst frenemies?… Because they are the best at throwing shade!
What do you get when you cross a tabby cat with a lemon tree?… A sour puss.
What did Betula pendula say to her super-annoying sister?… Leaf me alone, birch!
Why did the evil queen order her subjects to cut down all the trees in the kingdom?… She was jealous because every one of them had a bigger crown than her.
Why couldn’t the evergreen ever land a date?… It was so busy pining after unavailable trees that it never really branched out.
Did you know that I can cut down a dead tree just by looking at it?… It’s true. I saw it with my own eyes.
Why do trees make great thieves?… Sticky fingers.
Which side of a tree has the most leaves?… The outside.
What tree produces fruit that tastes like chicken?… Poultree.
What’s big, grey and falls from trees in Autumn?… Eleafant.
How did the elm tree know the fig tree wasn’t looking for anything serious?… It asked for no twigs attached.
What motorcycle brand do London plane trees ride through the forest?… Treeumph
Did you hear about the elephant that got stuck up a tree last summer?… In order to get down, she had to sit on a branch and wait until fall.
What’s the same size and shape as a giant sequoia tree, yet weighs nothing?… A giant sequoia tree’s shadow.
Why didn’t the tree hunt?… It was against his beleafs.
How do trees keep you in suspense?… I’ll tell you tomorrow.
How do bees travel to trees?… They take the buzz.
What is a pine tree’s favorite radio station?… Anything that plays the poplar hits.
What is green, has leaves, and a trunk?… A houseplant going on vacation.
How do trees contact one another?… By teleafone.
How many oranges grow on a tree?… All of them.
How did the idiot get hurt while raking leaves?… Fell out of the tree.
Where can Adansonia trees go for a quick trim?… To the baobarber.
What looks like half a tree?… The other half.
Which side of a cherry tree has the most leaves?… The outside.
What did the little tree say to the rude tree?… Leaf me alone.
How old was the tiny tree?… Near-leaf five.
What do you give to a thirsty tree?… Lemon-aid.
What is a tree’s favorite school subject?…Geometree.
Would you like to read a joke about tree-free paper?… The thing is, it’s tearable.
What looks like half a spruce tree?… The other half.
What do you call nice trees without any teeth?… Sweetgums.
What do vain trees do to get rid of wrinkles?…Get a faceleaft.
Why did the Chesnut tree feel left out?… It never got in on the oak.
What weighs more, a pound of leaves or a pound of logs?… Neither, they both weigh one pound.
Which Canadian city is a favorite vacation spot for American trees?… Montreeal.
What did the Jedi say to the sacred tree?… May the forest be with you.
Why are Tree Huggers bad at playing cards?… They like to avoid the flush.
Why did George Washington chop down the cherry tree with his hatchet?… Because his mom wouldn’t let him use the chainsaw. (Memorial Day Jokes)

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