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Top Joke Pages:
- Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best penguin jokes.
- Why don’t you see any penguins in Britain?… Because they’re afraid of Wales! (World Geography Jokes)
- Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?… Seal. (Music Jokes)
- When I become a lawyer I want to defend a penguin… Just so I can say the words “Your Honor, clearly my client is not a flight risk.” (Lawyer Jokes)
- What do you call a cold penguin?… A brrr-d. (Bird Jokes)
- What did Morgan Freeman say when Penguins told him they liked March of the Penguins?… Why the heck was I narrating it if Penguins can talk. (Movie Jokes)
- What birds like to write?… Penguins! (Grammar Jokes)
- What do penguins wear on their heads?… Ice caps! (Hat Jokes)
- What does a penguin eat on its birthday?… Fish cakes! (Birthday Jokes / Cake Jokes / Fishing Jokes / Penguin Jokes)
- What do you call a happy penguin?… a Pen-Grin! (Psychology Jokes)
- What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?… Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
- What do penguins eat for lunch?… Ice-burgers! (Hamburger Jokes)
- How do you know if a penguin has Covid?… It has to ice-olate. (Covid Jokes)
- Where do penguins go to the movies?… At the dive-in! (Movie Jokes)
- Dad, name 5 animals living in the North Pole… Three seals and two penguins. (Penguin Jokes & Dad Jokes)
- Have you heard of Flight of the Penguins (sequel to March)?… It’s a whale of a tale. (Whale Jokes & Movie Jokes)
- What do Penguins like to eat?… Brrrrrrrritos. (Burrito Jokes for Kids)
- What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?… Iceberg lettuce! (Lettuce Jokes)
- What do penguins like to wear on the beach?… A beak-ini. (Beach Jokes & Summer Jokes)
- How do you get in touch with a penguin?… Give him a wing.
- I just finished writing my book on penguins… My publisher said it would’ve been better if I’d written it on paper. (Book Jokes)
- Why didn’t the penguin jump off the iceberg?… He got cold feet.
- What is smarter than a talking penguin?… A spelling bee! (Bee Jokes)
- What does penguin who does magic say to his audience?… Pick a cod, any cod. (Magic Jokes & Fishing Jokes)
- Why do polar bears and penguins not get along?… Because they are polar opposites. (Bear Jokes)
- How does a group of penguins make a difficult decision?… Flipper coin.
- How does a penguin make pancakes?… With its flippers! (Pancake Jokes)
- Where do penguins keep their money?… In a snow bank!
- What do you call a penguin that has no eyes?… Pengun. (Biology Jokes for Teachers & Grammar Jokes)
- Why was the penguin so popular?… Well, he was an ice guy!
- What do Penguins sing on a birthday?… Freeze a jolly good fellow. (Birthday Jokes & 365 Music Jokes)
- What’s a penguin’s favorite dog?… A bichon freeze. (Dog Jokes)
- When I meet new people, I always talk about my pet penguin… It’s a good icebreaker. (National Pet Day Jokes)
- How do Penguins drink their cola?… On the rocks.
- Why don’t penguins fly?… Because they’re not tall enough to be pilots. (Pilot Jokes & Plane Jokes)
- How did the penguin pass its driving test?.. It winged it! (Car Jokes)
- Why do penguins wear glasses?… To help their ice-sight. (Biology Jokes for Teachers)
- What do penguins drink in the summer?… Iced tea. (Iced Tea Jokes & Summer Jokes)
- What is a penguin’s favorite movie?… Frozen. (Movie Jokes)
- What shoes do penguins wear in the summer?… Flipper flops. (Flip Flop Jokes & Summer Jokes)
- A penguin walks into a bar… The bartender looks up and says, “Hey, listen, these things don’t fly around here.” (Bird Jokes & Beer Jokes)
- How does a penguin cook burgers?… With his flippers. (Hamburger Jokes)
- Why do penguins always carry fish in their beaks?… They don’t have any pockets! (Fishing Jokes)
- What do penguins wear on their feet at nighttime?… Slippers. (Napping Jokes)
- What are the oldest animals?… Zebras and Penguins because they’re in black and white. (Zebra Jokes & Zoo Jokes)
- How do Penguins finish a race?… They pengwin. (Track and Field Jokes)
- Can a penguin fly?… No, but a toucan. (Bird Jokes)
- When visiting England, what do nuclear scientists penguins eat?… Fission chips. (Fishing Jokes)
- What’s a penguin’s favorite pasta?… Penguini. (Pasta Jokes)
- I had a latte with a penguin the other day… He said he would have preferred a fish. (Coffee Jokes & Fishing Jokes)
- Which bird always gets first place?… A peng-win.
- What’s a penguin’s favorite place to swim?… The South Pool. (Swimming Jokes)
- Who’s the head of the penguin navy?… Admiral Byrd! (Navy Jokes)
- Why are penguins good race drivers?… Because they’re always in the pole position! (NASCAR Jokes for Kids & Car Jokes)
- How do penguins drink?… Out of beak-ers! (Chemistry Jokes)
- How does a penguin build its house?.. Igloos it together!
- What do you give to a penguin that’s ill?… Some medical tweetment. (Doctor Jokes)
- Why don’t Penguins like rock music?… They only like sole. (Music Jokes)
- What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?… Really lost, because penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere!
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about penguins?
- Where do penguins go to dance?… The snow ball! (Dance Jokes)
- What would you call a penguin with no I?… Pengun.
- Where do penguins go swimming?… At the South Pool!
- They are doing a new sequel to the movie “March of the Penguins.”… They are calling it “April of the Penguins!” (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month & Movie Jokes)
- What do you call a penguin in the desert?… Lost!
- Why did the two penguins jump when they first met?… They were trying to break the ice.
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good penguin knock-knock joke?
- What’s black, white and red all over?… A penguin with a sunburn! (Summer Jokes)
- What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?… Starfish.
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good penguin knock knock jokes? (June Jokes & Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
- Why are penguins so difficult to get along with?… Because they’re always fishing for compliments. (Fishing Jokes)
- Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?… Because they’re afraid of Wales! (World Geography Jokes)
- Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?… Because they haven’t got any pockets.
- Where do penguins get money from?… A fishbank. (Fishing Jokes)
- What does a penguin lawyer order at a bar?… Just ice. (Lawyer Jokes & Beer Jokes)
- Why did the penguin cross the road?… To go with the floe!
- What does a penguin do when it loses its tail?… It goes to a re-tail store. (Black Friday Jokes)
- Why would a penguin cross the road twice?… To prove he isn’t a chicken. (Chicken Jokes)
- How does a penguin build a LEGO house?… Igloos it together!
- What’s black and white and goes round and round?… A penguin in a revolving door.
- Why do two penguins in a nest always agree?… Because they don’t want to fall out. (Bird Jokes)
- What’s black, white, black, white, black, white, black, white?… A penguin rolling down a hill.
- Why shouldn’t you write a book on penguins?… Because writing a book on paper is much easier! (Book Jokes)
- Why are penguins so good at using the internet?… Because they have web feet! (Computer Jokes)
- What was the name of the emperor’s penguin?… Julius Freezerrr. (Ides of March Jokes)
- Where does a 500 pound penguin sit when he’s resting?… Anywhere he wants!
- Which side of the penguin has the most feathers?… The outside.
- Why do penguins always come first when they race other animals?… Because they are peng-wins! (Track and Field Jokes)
- Why is it so hard to write a book on penguins?… Because they always squirm, are kind of slippery and writing a book on paper is much easier. (Book Jokes)
- Why do you never see a penguin in the UK?… They don’t like getting too close to wales.
- Which of the penguins relatives always gets the most visitors?… Aunt Arctica.
- Why wouldn’t one penguin speak to the other penguin?… He was giving him the cold shoulder.
- What is black, white and red all over?… A penguin with chicken pox.
- What is black, white and red all over?… A penguin with eczema.
- What is black, white and red all over?… A very embarrassed penguin.
- What do penguins do when they want to hookup?… Net fish and chill. (Fishing Jokes & Movie Jokes)
- What is a penguin’s favorite dancing style?… Pole Dancing. (Dance Jokes)
- I used to love telling jokes about penguins and ostriches… But it turns out they don’t really fly around here. (Bird Jokes)
- How do Penguins finish a race?… They Pengwin.
- Why did the Penguin get away with robbing the Gotham City Central Bank?… Because Batman doesn’t go downtown. (Batman Jokes)
- Why did the Penguin open his umbrella at Batman’s family reunion?… Because it was a Wayne-y day. (Batman Jokes)