101 Cow Jokes

by | Oct 9, 2022 | Dads, Latest News, School Jokes

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(Cow Jokes)

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July 11 is #CowAppreciationDay

  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best cow jokes.
  2. What do you call a cow that doesn’t give milk?… A MILK DUD! (Milk Jokes & Candy Jokes)
  3. My friend got fired from his cow milking job because of his erratic behavior…. He was a danger to himself and udders. (Milk Jokes & Labor Day Jokes)
  4. Knock Knock!… Who’s there?… Candy!… Candy who?… Candy cow jump over the moon? (10 Full Moon Jokes & Candy Jokes)
  5. What’s the fastest liquid on earth?… Milk. It’s pasteurized before you can see it. (Track Jokes & Milk Jokes)
  6. Where do Russians get their milk?… From Mos-cows (World Geography Jokes & Cow Jokes)
  7. What did one dairy cow say to another?… Got milk? (Milk Jokes)
  8. Why did the cow cross the road?… To get to the udder side.
  9. Why don’t cows have any money?… Because farmers milk them dry. (Milk Jokes)
  10. What is a cow’s favorite time of the month?… the full mooooooooooooooooon! (Full Moon Jokes)
  11. What’s a cow’s favorite holiday?… Moo Year’s Eve. (New Year’s Eve Jokes)
  12. Where do cows get together?… The meet market.
  13. Where do for Super Bowl quarterbacks go when they get old?… Out to pass-ture. (Super Bowl Jokes)
  14. Where did the cow family go on Father’s Day?… The moo-vies. (Movie Jokes & Father’s Day Jokes)
  15. Where do astronaut cows go to get milk?… The Milky Way! (Astronomy Jokes & Milk Jokes)
  16. What is the difference between the American Revolutionary War and several cows being launched into space?… One was the shot heard around the world and the other is a herd shot around the world. (Astronomy Jokes & American Revolution Jokes)
  17. Why can’t a cow become a detective?… They refuse to go on Steakouts.
  18. What is the cow’s favorite candy bar?… Milky Way. (Milk Jokes & Candy Jokes)
  19. How do you call an Eskimo cow?… An Eskimoo! (Winter Solstice Jokes)
  20. Where do cows go on vacation?… Moo Jersey. (Cow Jokes)
  21. Where do cows go for lunch?… The calf-eteria.
  22. What do you call a sleeping bull?… A bulldozer.
  23. What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?… Laughing stock.
  24. Why does a milking stool have only 3 legs?… Because the cow has the utter. (Biology Jokes)
  25. What is a cows favorite holiday?… Moo….morial day! (Memorial Day Jokes for Kids)
  26. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Cow says…. Cow says who?… No, a cow says mooooo!
  27. What is Gru’s favorite type of steak?… Filet Minion. (Minion Jokes)
  28. Where does chocolate ice-cream come from?… Brown cows! (Ice Cream Jokes)
  29. What’s the difference between a $20 steak and a $55 steak?… February 14th. (Valentine’s Day Jokes & Cow Jokes)
  30. What band is a cow favorite?… Moooooooo dy Blues.
  31. What did mama cow say to baby cow?… It’s pasture bedtime. (Mother’s Day Jokes)
  32. What do you get when you cross an ice-cream, a dog, and a cow?… A milk-shake! (Dog Jokes / Cow Jokes / Milk Jokes)
  33. What do cows wear in Hawaii?… Moo- moos. (Hawaii Jokes)
  34. Where do cows go to summer camp?… Moo Jersey. (Cow Jokes)
  35. What would you get if you crossed George Washington with cow food?… The fodder of our country… (Presidents Day Jokes)
  36. What do you get from an Alaskan cow?…  Ice Cream! (Ice Cream Jokes & Alaska Jokes)
  37. What do you get when you cross a corn cob and a cow?… Corned Beef. (Corn Jokes)
  38. What do you get when a pasteurizing factory experiences an earthquake?… Milkshake. (Milk Jokes & Earthquake Jokes)
  39. What happens when you talk to a cow?… It goes in one ear and out the udder! (Biology Jokes)
  40. What do cows do while skiing?… Moo-Guls! (Skiing Jokes)
  41. What did Darth Vader say when he walked into a vegetarian restaurant?… “I find your lack of steak disturbing.” (May the 4th Be With You Jokes)
  42. What are a cows favorite subjects in school?… Moosic, psycowolgy, cowculus (365 School Jokes)
  43. My friend lives in Colorado and wanted to start growing weed on his cow farm. I told him it wasn’t a good idea… The steaks would be too high. (Colorado Jokes)
  44. What do you call a cow stuck in a hurricane?… a milkshake. (Milk Jokes & Hurricane Jokes)
  45. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about cows?
  46. What do you call a cow in an earthquake?… A milkshake. (Milk Jokes & Cow Jokes)
  47. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good cow knock-knock joke?
  48. How does a cow get to the mooooon?… It flies through udder space! (Astronomy Jokes)
  49. What did Frosty call his cow?… Eskimoo! (Frosty the Snowman Jokes)
  50. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good cow knock knock jokes? (June Jokes & Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
  51. What do you get if you cross an angry sheep and an upset cow?… An animal that’s in a baaaaaaaad moooooood. (Psychology Jokes)
  52. What do you call a cow you can’t see?… Camooflauged. (Veterans Day Jokes)
  53. How easy is it to milk a cow?… It’s a piece of steak.
  54. What do you get from an Alaskan cow?…  Ice Cream (Top Geography Jokes / Alaska Jokes for Kids / Cow Jokes for Kids)
  55. What do cows get when they are sick?… Hay Fever.
  56. What was the bull doing in the pasture with his eyes closed?… Bull-dozin’
  57. Where do you find the most cows?… Moo-York (Top Geography Jokes)
  58. How hot is it in Arizona?… The cows are giving evaporated milk. (Arizona Jokes)
  59. What do cows say at Christmas?… MOOey Christmas!
  60. What do cows wear in Hawaii?… Moo Moo’s. (Geography Jokes for Kids & Summer Jokes for Kids)
  61. What do cows say at Christmas?… MOOey Christmas! (Christmas Jokes)
  62. Do you know why the cow jumped over the moon?… The farmer had cold hands. (Full Moon Jokes)
  63. What do you call a cow who’s just given birth?… De-calf-inated. (Coffee Jokes)
  64. Why did the cow cross the road?… To get to the udder side.
  65. Where do for Super Bowl quarterbacks go when they get old?… Out to pass-ture. (Top 10 Super Bowl Jokes)
  66. What Is A Cows Favorite Type Of Math?… Moo-tiplication (Pi Day Jokes)
  67. Why do cows wear bells?… Their horns don’t work.
  68. What do you call an evil cow?… De-mooooon.
  69. What do you call a cow with a twitch?… Beef Jerky.
  70. Where does a cow stay when it is on vacation?… A moo-tel!
  71. What animals do you bring to bed?… Your calves.
  72. What do you call a cow that doesn’t give milk?… An udder failure.
  73. Where do cows like to ride on trains?… In the cow-boose.
  74. Where did the bull lose all his money?… At the Cowsino.
  75. How do you know it’s cold outside?… When you milk a brown cow you get chocolate ice cream! (Ice Cream Jokes & Cow Jokes)
  76. What newspaper do cows read?…The Daily Moos.
  77. How easy is it to milk a cow?… It’s a piece of steak. (Cake Jokes)
  78. What do you get when you cross a cow and a whale?… Sha-Moo. (Whale Jokes for Kids)
  79. Where do cows go on their summer vacation?… Moo York. (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  80. What do you call a cow who always takes your stuff at summer camp?… A mooooocher! (Animal Jokes for Kids & Summer Camp Jokes)
  81. What do you call a cow with full armor?… Sir loin.
  82. Where do cows go before prom?… To the moooooovies. (Prom Jokes)
  83. What do you call a cynical cow?… Sour cream.
  84. What do you call a cow who works for a gardener?… A lawn moo-er.
  85. How do you call an Eskimo cow?… An Eskimoo!
  86. How can you tell which cow is the best dancer?… Wait til one busts a moooooove.
  87. How do you make a milkshake?… Give a cow a pogo stick.
  88. What would you get if you crossed George Washington with cattle feed?… The Fodder of Our Country! (4th of July Jokes for Kids)
  89. Did you hear that NASA recently launched a bunch of Holsteins into low Earth orbit?… They called it the Herd Shot ‘Round The World! (U.S. History Jokes)
  90. What do you call a really strong cow?… Beefy.
  91. What do you get when you give pasta to a cow?… Beefaroni.
  92. Where do Russians get their milk?… From Mos-cows (World Geography Jokes)
  93. Where did the cows go last night?…To the mooon (Full Moon Jokes)
  94. What do you call it when a cow jumps over a barbed wire fence?… Udder-Catastrophe.
  95. Which job is a cow most suited for?… Baker. Because they’re making cow pies regularly. (Pi Day Jokes)
  96. Why was the cow so scared?… Because he was a cow-ard.
  97. What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?… Bullogna.
  98. How does one cow talk to another?… Cow-munication.
  99. What does a cow put on his french toast?… Moooolasses.
  100. How does a farmer count a herd of cows?… With a Cowculator! (Pi Day Jokes)
  101. What do you call a cow that can cut the grass?… Mulan.
  102. What do you call a cow with an assistant?… Moooooving up in the world.
  103. What’s a cow’s favorite moosical note?… Beef-flat.
  104. What is a cows favorite colour?… Maroooooooon.
  105. What was the first animal in space?… The cow that jumped over the moon!
  106. Where do cows get their weapons?… Ar-moooo-ries. (Veterans Day Jokes)
  107. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a dairy cow?… Peanut butter.
  108. What do you get when you walk under a cow?… A pat on the head. (Biology Jokes)
  109. What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck?… Milk and Quackers!
  110. Where do cows go when they want a night out?… To the moo-vies!
  111. Did you hear about the snobby cow?… She thought she was a cutlet above the rest!
  112. Where do you find the most cows?… Moo-York City. (Top Geography Jokes)
  113. What do you call a sad cow?… Mooooved to tears.
  114. What do cows wear in Hawaii?… Moo- moos (Top Geography Jokes)
  115. What did the bored cow say when she got up in the morning?… “It’s just an udder day”
  116. Did you hear that Chuck Norris is a matador?… He takes the bull by the horns.
  117. What did the cow say to the lousy renter?… Moooooooooo your self out of here.
  118. What kind of milk comes from a forgetful cow?… Milk of Amnesia (Psychology Jokes)
  119. What did the cow say to the turtle?… Get a moove on.
  120. What is the difference between a car and a bull?… A car only has one horn.
  121. What do you call a cow that’s afraid of the dark?… A coward.
  122. What do you call it when one bull spies on another bull?… A steak-out!
  123. Why are cows so soft?… Because they are made out of leather.
  124. What do call a cow that has just had a calf?… Decalfenated (Coffee Jokes)
  125. Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?…  Because her horn didn’t work
  126. Where do cows go for summer camp?… Moo York. (Summer Camp Jokes & Cow Jokes)
  127. What did the cow say when a person played the piano?… That’s good moooooosic.
  128. What do you call a cow on the barnyard floor?… Ground Beef.
  129. What do you call a cow with no front legs?… Lean Beef.
  130. What do you call a cow with no legs at all?… Ground beef
  131. What do you call a grumpy cow?… Moo-dy.
  132. Why is the barn so noisy?… Because all of the cows have horns.
  133. What do cows get when they do all their chores?… Mooooney.
  134. What did one dairy cow say to another?… Got milk?
  135. How to you know that cows will be in heaven?… It’s a place of udder delight.
  136. When is a farmer like a magician?… When he turns his cow into pasture.
  137. What do you get when you cross and smurf and a cow?… Blue cheese!
  138. What did the secret agent cow say to the other cow?… Are you udder cover?
  139. Why can’t the bankrupt cowboy complain?… He’s got no beef.
  140. What happened to the lost cattle?…N obody’s herd.
  141. Where does a cow stop to drink?… The milky way!
  142. What do you get when you cross a cow and a lawnmower?… A lawnmooer.
  143. How do you stop a bull from charging?… Take away his credit card!
  144. Why don’t you tell a cow a secret?… Because it goes in one ear and out the udder!
  145. What does an invisible man drink?… Evaporated milk!
  146. Why does the cow bring toilet paper to the party?… Because he is a party pooper.
  147. What do you find a gallery of cows?… The mooseum.
  148. What do you call a half a cow?… a calf.
  149. What happens when a cow laughs too hard?… It Cowlapses!
  150. What did one cow say to the other?… Mooooooove over!
  151. What has four legs and goes Oom, Oom?… A cow walking backwards!
  152. Why was the cow sad?… She was moody.
  153. What do cows read in the mornings?… The moospaper.
  154. What did the farmer say to the cow?… Produce some milk
  155. How did the Wyoming grad die from drinking milk?… The cow fell on him! (Cow Jokes)