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Google Search “Black Friday Jokes”

  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best Black Friday jokes.
  2. Black Friday: The day people spend money they don’t have on things they don’t need.
  3. Amazing BLACK FRIDAY deal: Buy NOTHING and save up to 100% in EVERY STORE!
  4. All this spending on Black Friday… Better make sure ya’ll pay the electric bill first or next Friday will be Black Friday too!
  5. Black Friday = Broke Saturday.
  6. I handed in an assignment late today, looks like my teacher is giving Black Friday deals too… 50% off. (180 School Jokes & Teacher Jokes)
  7. I’ve saved an absolute fortune this Black Friday… I stayed in.
  8. A small business owner was upset when a brand new corporate chain much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read “BEST BLACK FRIDAY DEALS!” He was horrified when another competitor opened up on the other side of him and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading “LOWEST BLACK FRIDAY PRICES!” The small business owner panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop. It read “MAIN ENTRANCE.”
  9. I went to a fireworks store yesterday looking for a Black Friday deal… I was blown away. (Fireworks Jokes)
  10. Black Friday: Because only in America people trample others for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have.
  11. What song by the Who is the unofficial song of Black Friday… Bargain. (365 Music Jokes)
  12. Black Friday is a scam… You should be mad they overcharge you 364 days a year.
  13. I just bought two kayaks for the price of one… Canoe believe it? (Canoe Jokes)
  14. I went to McDonalds and Wendy’s and Burger Kings and all the fries were burnt!… Then I realized it’s Black Fryday.(Top 50 Coronation Jokes Fast Food Jokes)
  15. What do you call an amazing Black Friday special that comes with free cake?… A sweet deal. (Cake Jokes)
  16. What is the Guillotine?… A French chopping center. (French Revolution Jokes)
  17. Did you hear about the huge Black Friday sale they just had on canoes?… It was quite the oar deal. (Canoe Jokes)
  18. What happens when Black Friday falls on Friday the 13th?… Prices get slashed! (Friday the 13th Jokes)
  19. How can you tell which one of your friends got a good Black Friday deal?… Don’t worry they’ll let you know.
  20. Black Friday Family Tips: “Now remember what I taught you! Push, shove, grab, yell, and if needed tackle! Get out there and make Grandma proud!”
  21. I’m going to spend a thousand dollars for a computer on Black Friday… It’s going to be grand. (Computer Jokes)
  22. I actually enjoy Black Friday. It’s the one day I know exactly where all the nut jobs are and how to avoid them.
  23. I’ve got the deal already worked out – this Black Friday, I’m getting a new Lexus for my wife. I think she’s going to be really surprised – but from my perspective, it’s an awesome trade. (Car Jokes)
  24. When is the best time to buy clothing?… Mardi Gras… All shirts are half off. (Mardi Gras Jokes)
  25. A dog goes into a camping store and buys a tent. The cashier says, “You don’t see a dog in here buying a tent very often.” The dog says, “At these prices, I’m not surprised.” (Dog jokes for Kids & Camping Jokes)
  26. Minions do most of their shopping on Gru-pon. (Minion Jokes)
  27. What do you get if you cross a mole with a retail destination?… A shopping mole. (Mole Jokes)
  28. What do you call a canoe that’s 50% off?… A sale boat. (Canoe Jokes)
  29. Where did George Washington buy his hatchet?… At the chopping mall. (Presidents Day Jokes)
  30. What would Gandalf have said if The Lord of the Rings been in a supermarket instead of Middle-Earth?… One ring to rule the mall. (Lord of the Rings Jokes)
  31. What does a penguin do when it loses its tail?… It goes to a re-tail store.
  32. What happens after you eat an entire gallon of “All Natural” ice cream?… You get Breyer’s remorse! (Ice Cream Jokes)
  33. On Black Friday, just be decent and civilized… by holding the cell phone horizontal when recording any fights.
  34. The boat shop was having a huge discount on all their Galleons and Brigantines for Black Friday this year… It was the biggest sail event they’ve ever had.
  35. How do you prevent an elephant from charging?… Take away it’s credit card. (Elephant Jokes)
  36. When is the best time for a pirate to buy a new ship?… On Black Friday, when it’s on sail. (Pirate Jokes)
  37. It’s Black Friday and the mall is packed with shoppers. John has lost sight of his wife and can’t find her. He goes up to a very attractive woman and says, “Excuse me, can you help me? I cannot see my wife, and I know that she is here in the shopping mall somewhere. Can you just talk to me for a couple of minutes?” The attractive woman replies “Why?” John says, “Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman, my wife shows up out of thin air.”
  38. Here’s hoping Black Friday won’t turn into Black and Blue Saturday.
  39. What was the horse looking for on Black Friday?… A Macintosh. (Computer Jokes & Horse Jokes)
  40. Bought a new vacuum on Black Friday… It sucks!
  41. Colorado man fires gun at a retail store… It was a target.
  42. It’s Black Friday, and I just got an iPhone 13 for my wife I thought it was a good trade.
  43. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about Black Friday?
  44. What do Black Friday shoppers and the Thanksgiving turkey have in common?… They know what it’s like to be jammed into a small place and stuffed! (Thanksgiving Jokes & Turkey Jokes)
  45. So Black Friday at the Geology Museum was great!… There were so many great shales! It really rocked.
  46. Why don’t they have Father’s Day sales?… Because Fathers are priceless. (Father’s Day Jokes)
  47. Black Friday: A day Americans are willing to kill over materialistic things just a day after celebrating what they’re already thankful for.
  48. I was too lazy to go out shopping today, so to make it feel like Black Friday, I punched a few family members while online shopping.
  49. An older woman runs into her friend at the mall. “You’re not going to believe this,” she said. “I found an old lamp the other day. I rubbed it and a genie popped out. He explained that genies don’t give three wishes anymore, but he did offer me a choice between one of two wishes. He could give me a better memory or turn my husband into the greatest lover ever.” “Tough choice,” said her friend. “Which one did you choose?” “That’s the thing. I can’t remember.” (Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes & Black Friday Jokes)
  50. It’s going to be a hot Black Friday weekend, so our town’s ice store is having a liquidation sale. (Memorial Day Jokes)
  51. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good Black Friday knock-knock joke?
  52. What’s the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?… Beer Nuts are around a dollar seventy-nine, and deer nuts are just under a buck! (Hunting Jokes)
  53. On Black Friday, where did George Washington buy his hatchet?… At the chopping mall. (Memorial Day Jokes)
  54. It’s sad that Americans get more excited about Black Friday than Good Friday… more interested in sales than the greatest gift. (Good Friday Jokes)
  55. Why do shoppers feel like cranberry juice on Black Friday?… They get bruised and battered bloody by other people until they get squeezed at the cashier.
  56. Where did Mrs. Avogadro do her shopping on Black Friday?… In a shopping mole. (Mole Day Jokes)
  57. Why did Santa bring 22 reindeer to Walmart?… Because what he wanted to buy cost around 20 bucks, but just in case it was more, he brought some extra doe. (Reindeer Jokes)
  58. What did Nala tell Simba after seeing a crowd of ladies on Black Friday?… You gotta Mufasa (move faster) (Top 10 Lion King Jokes)
  59. How is the Battle for Hogwarts like a Black Friday sale?… Weasley twins are 50% off. (Harry Potter Jokes)
  60. What time is it when a hippo sits on your hat?… Time for a new hat. (Hat Jokes)
  61. Why do they call the day after Thanksgiving “Black Friday?”… It matches the mood of all those unhappy shoppers. (Thanksgiving Jokes)
  62. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good Black Friday knock knock jokes? (June Jokes Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
  63. The day after the Thanksgiving, what did the fridge say when it was asked, “Is everything alright over here?” “No, everything is all leftover here!”
  64. How do you know Arnold Schwarzenegger is waiting in line with you on Black Friday?… He Jingles All The Way. (Christmas Jokes)
  65. Today a man stole my wallet He took the 100 dollars I had with me and started counting the money. He gave me 50 dollars back. Confused, I asked why. He said: “Today’s Black Friday, so every stolen wallet has a 50% discount!”
  66. Who profits the most on Black Friday?… The one who was smart enough not to go shopping on that day.
  67. Thanksgiving Motto:”Leftovers are for quitters!” (Thanksgiving Jokes)
  68. It’s Black Friday, and I just got an iPhone 6 for my wife I thought it was a good trade.
  69. Every year on Black Friday I make sure I wake up extra early. To go on the internet to see all the fights.
  70. Why do people go clothes shopping on Black Friday?… To replace all the clothes they spilled Thanksgiving dinner on.
  71. What’s the best part about Black Friday?… Resting on Saturday.
  72. I’ll be celebrating Black Friday in my own way — by completely ignoring it.
  73. Why do Americans go shopping on Black Friday?… They are thankful they survived Thanksgiving’s feast.
  74. What flies faster than items off the rack on Black Friday?… Credit card payment slips!
  75. Which family usually spends the most on Black Friday?… The one who earns the least.
  76. What animal flies faster than items off the rack on Black Friday?… Credit card payment vultures.
  77. What do people eat on Black Friday?… Whatever they couldn’t finish on Thanksgiving Thursday. (Thanksgiving Jokes)
  78. My version of Black Friday is deleting all the people in my phone who sent me a mass Thanksgiving text.
  79. Fantastic Black Friday deal alert: Buy nothing and save 100% in every store!
  80. Black Friday sale on Star Wars Battlefront 2… Save up to $2160 by not buying it.
  81. Probable Headline: “1000 Americans killed trying to get Twinkies on Black Friday.”
  82. Black Friday at the geology museum was great!… There were so many great shales!
  83. Today, I arrived at a local Black Friday sale at 7 AM and saw the riot police. I had never seen the riot police arrive this early before, so I asked them why they came so early. One of them replied, “We arrived early, because we like to beat the crowd.”
  84. Did y’all hear about the guy who shot himself in Walmart in Black Friday?… They’re calling it a self-checkout.
  85. I think it’s only fair the week after Black Friday be called White Friday… And then with the remaining Fridays before the next Black Friday, you can have fifty shades of grey.
  86. Sorry, but there’s no deal for the hospital visit you will need after being pummeled on Black Friday.
  87. Here’s hoping the Black Friday injuries aren’t so bad that you can’t click on a mouse on Cyber Monday.