My Town Tutors is a great resource for parents & teachers. Find qualified tutors in your area today!
- Jokes for Teachers
- FREE U.S. History Lessons
- FREE Psychology Lessons
- December Jokes for Teachers
- Top 10 New Year’s Eve Jokes (New Year’s Eve Jokes for Teachers)
Google Search “New Year’s Jokes for Teachers”
- “I promise not to make any bad jokes for the rest of the year.” A high school teacher on the last day before Winter Break. (Dad Jokes & High School Jokes)
- Where does a math teacher go to practice math on New Year’s Eve?… Times Square. (Math Jokes for Teachers)
- What happened to the student who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve?… He got 12 months! (Police Jokes & Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
- Teacher to his class:Not to brag, but I already have a date for New Year’s Eve… It’s December 31st.
- Why does a student need a jeweler on New Year’s Eve?… To ring in the New Year.
- Why did the teacher put the new calendar in the freezer?… To start off the New Year in a cool way. (Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
- Why did the biology teacher stand on her left foot during the New Year’s Eve countdown?… So she starts the New Year on the right foot. (Biology Jokes for Teachers)
- Why was 6 afraid of 9 on New Year’s Eve?… Because 9, 8, 7 … (Math Jokes for Teachers)
- What did the generous chemistry teacher say when his friends crashed his New Year’s Eve party?… The mole the merrier! (Mole Day Jokes & Chemistry Jokes for Teachers)
- What New Year’s resolution should a high school basketball player never make?… To travel more. (Travel Guest Blogs & High School Jokes)
- What does a teacher tell students on the the 1st day back from Christmas Break?… I haven’t seen you for a year!
- New Year’s Resolution for a Teacher: I will not roll my eyes when school administrators offer impractical classroom “suggestions” at faculty meetings.
- New Year’s Resolution for a Teacher: I will not speak ill of the copy machine when it breaks down. I will have plenty of time later.
- An optimistic teacher stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimistic teacher stays up to make sure the old year leaves.
- Did you hear about the teacher who started fixing breakfast at midnight on Dec. 31?… He wanted to make a New Year’s toast! (Bread Jokes & Breakfast Jokes)
- What song did Avogadro’s family sing on New Year’s Eve?… “Mole Lang Syne.” (Mole Day Jokes & Music Jokes)
- The only “homework” you want your dog to chew up is your list of New Year’s resolutions. (December Jokes for Teachers)
- What did the high school cheerleaders say on New Year’s Day?… Happy New Cheer! (Cheerleading Jokes & High School Jokes)
- What do the teacher say when bidding farewell on Dec. 31?… “See you next year!””
- What happened to the teacher who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve?… She got 12 months! (Police Jokes)
- What did the teacher go to a jeweler do on Dec. 31?… Ring in the New Year.
- Knock knock... Who’s there?… Mary and Abbey... Mary and Abbey who?… Mary Christmas and Abbey New Year! (Christmas Knock Knock Jokes & New Year’s Eve Jokes)
- I love when they drop the ball in Times Square …… It’s a nice reminder of what I did all year.
- Youth is when you’re allowed to stay up for New Year’s. Middle age is when you’re forced to.
- Knock knock!… Who’s there?… Razor… Razor who?… Razor glass and toast the New Year.
- Every New Year’s Eve, I look forward to a good show at Time’s Square …… and year after year, they drop the ball. (New York Jokes)
- What do students who get detentions pay on Jan. 1?… New Year’s restitution.
- What happened to the middle school student who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve?… He got 12 months! (Police Jokes & Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
- What happened to the high school student who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve?… He got 12 months! (Police Jokes & Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
- What happened to the elementary school student who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve?… He got 12 months! (Police Jokes & Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
- Why does a high school student need a jeweler on New Year’s Eve?… To ring in the New Year.
- Why does a middle school student need a jeweler on New Year’s Eve?… To ring in the New Year.
- Why does a elementary school student need a jeweler on New Year’s Eve?… To ring in the New Year.
- What New Year’s resolution should a middle school basketball player never make?… To travel more. (Travel Guest Blogs & Middle School Jokes)
- What New Year’s resolution should a elementary school basketball player never make?… To travel more. (Travel Guest Blogs & Elementary School Jokes)
- “I promise not to make any bad jokes for the rest of the year.” A middle school teacher on the last day before Winter Break. (Dad Jokes & Middle School Jokes)
- What did the high school teacher go to a jeweler do on Dec. 31?… Ring in the New Year.
- What did the middle school teacher go to a jeweler do on Dec. 31?… Ring in the New Year.
- What did the elementary teacher go to a jeweler do on Dec. 31?… Ring in the New Year.
- What did the middle school cheerleaders say on New Year’s Day?… Happy New Cheer!
- What did the elementary school cheerleaders say on New Year’s Day?… Happy New Cheer!
ALL New Year’s Eve Jokes
- Not to brag, but I already have a date for New Year’s Eve… It’s December 31st.
- Every New Year’s Eve, I look forward to a good show at Time’s Square …… and year after year, they drop the ball. (New York Jokes)
- “I promise not to make any bad jokes for the rest of the year.” A dad on New Year’s Eve. (Dad Jokes)
- Why do you need a jeweler on New Year’s Eve?… To ring in the New Year.
- How does New Year’s Eve end?… With the letter ‘E’!
- If 2020 was a person I’d sue him for pain and suffering. (Lawyer Jokes)
- The year 2020 is going to be filled with so many puns about perfect vision …… I can’t wait to see them all.
- I can’t wait till New Year’s Day 2021… Then I can say hindsight is really 2020.
- What happened to the man who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve?… He got 12 months! (Police Jokes & Top 10 Jokes for Each Month)
- What is a New Year’s resolution?… Something that goes in one year and out the other.
- May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions.
- What new year’s resolution should a basketball player never make?… To travel more.
- Knock knock!… Who’s there?… Razor… Razor who?… Razor glass and toast the New Year.
- What do snowmen like to do on New Year’s Eve?… Chill out.
- An iPhone and a firework were arrested on New Year’s Eve. One was charged and the other was let off. (Fireworks Jokes & Police Jokes)
- What does the Easter Bunny say on New Year’s Eve?…. Hoppy New Year! (Easter Jokes)
- What did the little champagne bottle call his father?… Pop! (Dad Jokes)
- Where can you find comedians on New Year’s Eve?… Waiting for the punchline.
- Why should you put your new calendar in the freezer?… To start off the New Year in a cool way.
- Youth is when you’re allowed to stay up for New Year’s. Middle age is when you’re forced to.
- I love when they drop the ball in Times Square …… It’s a nice reminder of what I did all year.
- An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.
- Knock knock... Who’s there?… Abbey... Abbey who?… Abbey New Year! (Christmas Knock Knock Jokes & New Year’s Eve Jokes)
- New Year?… I just got used to this last one!
- At the beginning of this year I made a New Year’s resolution to lose 10 pounds … … Only 15 more to go!
- What’s the problem with jogging on New Year’s Eve?… The ice falls out of your drinks! (Track & Field Jokes)
- Did you hear about the fire cracker’s New Year’s Eve party?… It was a BANG! (Fireworks Jokes)
- What did the ghost say on January 1st?… Happy Boo Year. (Ghost Jokes)
- What’s a cow’s favorite holiday?… Moo Year’s Eve. (Cow Jokes)
- What do you call always having a date for New Year’s Eve?… Social Security. (Valentine’s Day Jokes)
- Why should you stand on just your left foot during the New Year’s Eve countdown?… So you start the New Year on the right foot.
- Where can you go to practice math on New Year’s Eve?… Times Square. (Math Jokes for Teachers)
- What song does a vampire sing on New Year’s Eve?… Auld FANG Syne. (Vampire Jokes & 365 Family Friendly Jokes)
- What do you tell someone you didn’t see on New Year’s Eve?… I haven’t seen you for a year!
- What is a corn’s favorite holiday?… New Ear’s Eve. (Corn Jokes & Farming Jokes)
- The only “homework” you want your dog to chew up is your list of New Year’s resolutions. (December Jokes for Teachers)
- What do New Year’s parades have in common with Santa Claus?… No one is awake to see either of them.
- My New Year’s resolution is to stop procrastinating. But I’ll wait until tomorrow to start.
- What song did Avogadro’s family sing on New Year’s Eve?… “Mole Lang Syne.” (Mole Day Jokes & Music Jokes)
- Let’s celebrate New Year’s Eve …… by making many pour decisions! (Beer Jokes)
- What do you call someone named Stephen on Dec. 31?… New Year’s Steve!
- What is the digital camera’s New Year’s resolution?… 1080p.
- What should you never eat on New Year’s Eve?… Fire crackers.
- (In 2020) My friend asked me where I see myself in the new year… How would I know? I don’t have 2020 vision.
- (In 2020) Looking at the new year’s calendar …… we’ll all have 2020 vision.
- What happened to the woman who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve?… She got 12 months! (Police Jokes)
- Knock knock... Who’s there?… Mary and Abbey... Mary and Abbey who?… Mary Christmas and Abbey New Year! (Christmas Knock Knock Jokes & New Year’s Eve Jokes)
- What New Year’s resolution guarantees success?… Making a resolution to break your resolution.
- What does a caterpillar do on Jan. 1?… Turns over a new leaf.
- Did you hear about the guy who started fixing breakfast at midnight on Dec. 31?… He wanted to make a New Year’s toast!
- What did the generous mole say when his friends crashed his New Year’s Eve party?… The mole the merrier! (Mole Day Jokes & New Year’s Eve Jokes)
- Why was 6 afraid of 9 on New Year’s Eve?… Because 9, 8, 7 … (Math Jokes for Kids)
- What is a cow’s favorite holiday?… Moo Year’s Day! (Cow Jokes)
- What do you tell someone you didn’t see at New Year’s Eve?… I haven’t seen you for a year!
- I was going to quit all my bad habits for the new year, but then I remembered that nobody likes a quitter.
- I would lose weight for my New Year’s resolution …… but I hate losing.
- My New Year’s resolution is to get better at pretending to know the words to “Auld Lang Syne.” (Music Jokes)
- Why do birds fly south for New Year’s Eve?… It’s too far to walk.
- My resolution was to read more …… so I put the subtitles on my TV.
- What is corn’s favorite holiday?… New EARS Day! (Corn Jokes & Farming Jokes)
- What do you call always wanting a date for New Year’s Eve?… Social Security.
- They say New York has the best New Year’s Eve Party… I’d say it’s overrated — every year they drop the ball.
- Knock knock!… Who’s there?… Cheese… Cheese who?… For cheese a jolly good fellow.
- What does the Easter Bunny say on New Year’s Day?…. Hoppy New Year! (Easter Jokes)
- What was the Amityville Priest’s resolution?… To exorcise more.
- My New Year’s resolution is to be more optimistic by keeping my cup half-full …… with either rum, vodka, or whiskey.
- This New Year’s, I resolved to lead a better life. Now all I have to do is find someone who will trade lives with me.
- My New Year’s resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year’s resolutions.
- My New Year’s resolution is to break my New Year’s resolutions. That way I succeed at something!
- What did the cat say on New Year’s Eve?… Meow.
- What is the snowman’s New Year’s resolution?… To chill out more.
- What does a jeweler do on Dec. 31?… Ring in the New Year.
- What do criminals pay on Jan. 1?… New Year’s restitution.
- What did the cheerleaders say on New Year’s Day?… Happy New Cheer!
- What do you say when bidding farewell on Dec. 31?… “See you next year!”
- What does a ghoul say on Dec. 31?… “Happy New Fear!”
New Years Eve One Liners
- A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.
- May all your troubles last as long as your New Year resolutions.