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More “Egg Jokes”

  1. I was going to tell you a joke about National Egg Day… but it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.
  2. What day do eggs hate most?… Fry-day the 13th! (Friday the 13th Jokes)
  3. What do you call an Easter Bunny who gets kicked out of school?… Egg-spelled. (180 School Jokes & Principal Jokes)
  4. How do comedians like their eggs?… Funny side up!
  5. Why can’t you tease egg whites?… Because they can’t take a yolk!
  6. Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?… So he could grade his eggs. (Egg Jokes / Farming Jokes / Jokes for Teachers)
  7. Why is the Liberty Bell like a dropped Easter egg?… They’re both cracked. (Easter Jokes & American Revolution Jokes)
  8. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Bacon… Bacon who?… Bacon eggs for Mother’s Day. (Bacon Jokes & Mom Jokes)
  9. What crime is an egg most afraid of?… Poaching. (Elephant Jokes)
  10. I wasn’t going to visit my family this December, but my mom promised to make me Eggs Benedict… So I’m going home for the hollandaise. (Egg Jokes & World’s Best Christmas Jokes)
  11. What is the Grinch’s favorite play?… Green Eggs and Hamlet! (Grinch Jokes & Book Jokes)
  12. Why are scrambled eggs like a losing hockey team?… Because they’ve both been beaten. (Hockey Jokes)
  13. What do you get when you cross a dog and an egg?… A pooched egg. (Dog Jokes)
  14. Why is a scrambled egg like a losing basketball team?… Because they both have been beaten. (March Madness Jokes)
  15. What did the Easter Bunny say about the Easter parade?… It was eggs-cellent! (Easter Jokes)
  16. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Omelet… Omelet who?… Omelet Mommy sleep in for Mother’s Day. (Napping Jokes / Mother’s Day Knock Knock Jokes / Mom Jokes)
  17. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Omelet… Omelet who?… Omelet Daddy sleep in for Mother’s Day. (Napping Jokes & Mother’s Day Knock Knock Jokes))
  18. Where did the one legged pirate go for breakfast?… IHOP. (Pirate Jokes for Kids)
  19. What is the difference between an elephant and a dozen eggs?… If you don’t know, I am sure not going to send you to the store for a dozen eggs. (Elephant Jokes for Kids)
  20. What sport are the eggs good at?… Running! (Track and Field Jokes for Kids)
  21. What do chickens call a school test? …Eggs-amination! (School Jokes for Kids)
  22. How do monsters like their eggs?… Terri-fried! (Halloween Jokes for Kids)
  23. Why are middle school cafeteria workers cruel?… Because they batter fish, beat eggs, and whip cream. (Fish Jokes & Middle School Jokes)
  24. How did the egg get up the mountain?… It scrambled up! (Hiking Jokes for Kids)
  25. What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede?… Bacon and Legs. (Bacon Jokes)
  26. Who wrote the book, Great Eggspectations?… Charles Chickens! (Book Jokes)
  27. Where do you find information about eggs?… In the hen-cyclopedia! (Book Jokes)
  28. What’s a hen’s favorite shipping company?…Federal Egg-spress.
  29. What day do eggs hate most?… Fry-day!
  30. What did Snow White call her chicken?… Egg white. (Disney Jokes for Kids)
  31. What do you call an egg taking a snooze on the job?… Egg-zosted! (Napping Jokes for Kids)
  32. Who tells the best egg jokes?… Comedi-hens!
  33. What do you call an egg that goes on safari?… An eggs-plorer! (World Geography Jokes)
  34. What does a meditating egg say?… Ohmmmmmmmlet.
  35. Don’t put all my eggs in one basket?… Nice try, basket industry.
  36. What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?… A brick layer.
  37. Why did the egg go to school?… To get “egg-u-cated”!
  38. What do you call a mischievous egg?… A practical yolker. Why did the chicken lay her egg on an axe?… She wanted to hachet.
  39. What did the egg say to the clown?… You crack me up!
  40. What part did the egg play in the movies?… He was an “Egg-stra”.
  41. What’s a baby chick’s favorite plant?… EGG-plants! (Flower Jokes)
  42. What do chickens serve at birthday parties?… Coop-cakes! (Cupcake Jokes for Kids)
  43. What do you call an egg white with cowboy boots?… A western omelette!
  44. How do eggs leave the highway?… By going through the eggs-it.
  45. What did the eggs do when the light turned green?… They egg-celerated!
  46. Did you hear about McDonalds?… They eggspanded the breakfast menu.
  47. Why is the chef so mean?… She beats the eggs!
  48. What did one egg say to another?… Your yolks crack me up.
  49. Why do chickens lay eggs?… Because if they dropped them they would break!
  50. What do Chickens grow on?… Eggplants!
  51. What do you call an egg who is on the computer too much?… An “Egg Head.” (Computer Jokes for Kids)
  52. What did the mommy egg say to the baby egg?… You’re “Egg-stra special”.
  53. What does the chicken say to get across a busy street?… EGGS-cuse me please!
  54. I was going to tell you a joke about an egg… but it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.
  55. What’s a baby chick’s favorite plant?… EGG-plants! (Chicken Jokes / Egg Jokes / Flower Jokes)
  56. What grows on yolk trees?… Egg-corns!
  57. What is an eggs favorite tree?… A y-oak tree!
  58. How do chickens pay for their groceries?… Using the eggs-press line.
  59. How many eggs can you eat on an empty stomach?… Just one, because then your stomach won’t be empty.
  60. How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?… The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
  61. How do baby chickens dance?… Chick-to-chick!
  62. What did the egg do when it saw the frying pan?… It scrambled.
  63. What do you get if a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?… An eggroll.
  64. What do you get when you cross a chicken with a martian?… An eggs-traterrestrial!
  65. What do you call a city of 20 million eggs?… New Yolk City!
  66. What do you call a good omelette?… Eggcellent.
  67. How do you find prehistoric eggs?… With an eggscavator.
  68. What do you call a handyman who lives on a farm?… An egg-chanic.
  69. What do you when you make a egg laugh?… You crack it up.
  70. What do eggs do for fun? Kari-yolkie
  71. What happens when a baby chick hatches?… It gets all egg-cited.
  72. If fruit comes from a fruit tree, what kind of a tree does a chicken come from?…  A poul-tree!
  73. What do you call a pig with a rash?… Ham and Eczema.
  74. What happens to an egg when it laughs too hard?… It cracks up!
  75. What’s an eggs favorite basketball team?… Yokelahomia City.
  76. How do you make an egg roll?… You push it!
  77. Would you like to hear an egg yolk, I have a dozen of them.
  78. Egg puns are the most egg-citing.
  79. What do you call someone who eats too many eggs?…An egg-oholic.
  80. At a kid’s birthday party, the hired magician was producing egg after egg from a little boy’s ear. “There!” he said proudly. “I bet your Mum can’t produce eggs without hens, can she?” “Oh yes, she can,” said the boy. “She keeps ducks.” (Funny Animal Jokes)
  81. A wife was cooking her husband fried eggs for breakfast. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. “Careful,” he shouted, “CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They’re going to STICK! Careful! CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you’re cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don’t forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!!! THE SALT!!!” The wife stared at him like he was crazy. She said, “What on earth is the matter with you? Do you think I don’t know how to fry a couple of eggs?” The husband calmly replied, “I wanted to show you what it feels like when I’m driving.”
  82. A woman takes her son to the doctor’s and tells the doctor that he thinks he’s a chicken. The doctor asks, “How long has he been like this?” The woman replies, “Three years.” The doctor exclaims, “Three years! Why didn’t you bring him in sooner?” The woman says, “We needed the eggs.”
  83. Two eggs are in a  frying pan. The first egg says “It’s boiling in here.” The second egg says “Wow! A talking egg!”
  84. It’s my first day on the fishing boat and everyone keeps asking if I’ve found my sea legs. I’m not falling for it though. I know for a fact that seals don’t lay eggs.
  85. What kind of eggs does a confused chicken lay?… Scrambled eggs. (Psychology Jokes)
  86. When I was younger, I once smashed up a nest of heron’s eggs…. No egrets. (Bird Jokes for Kids)My son’s asked for a strange Christmas present this year. It’s really cheap though so I don’t mind…. I’m not sure why he wants an eggs box though. (Christmas Jokes for Kids)
  87. Eggs – the original boneless chicken.
  88. I never count my chickens before they’re hatched… Because they’re eggs.
  89. A man is walking along the street one morning, feeling hungry. He sees a sign in the window of a restaurant that says, “Try our Exotic Breakfast now” so he walks in and sits down at a table. The waitress comes over and asks what he wants. The man asks, “What’s your Exotic Breakfast?” “Baked tongue of chicken,” she proudly replies. The man shouts, “Baked tongue of chicken! Have you any idea how disgusting that is? I’d never even think about eating anything that came out of a chicken’s mouth! Urrghhh!!” The waitress is a little taken aback, but stays calm and asks him, “No problem, sir. What would you prefer, then?” The man says, “Just bring me some scrambled eggs.” (Biology Jokes for Kids)
  90. My dad always used to tell me, “Never put all your eggs in one basket.”…Which is probably why we lost the Easter egg hunt. (Easter Jokes for Kids)
  91. Fried eggs aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.
  92. What do you get when you cross a pig and a chicken?… The best bacon-and-eggs of your life. (Egg Jokes)
  93. If a rooster laid a brown egg and a white egg, what kind of chicks would hatch?…None. Roosters don’t lay eggs.