Top 50 Lord of the Rings Jokes

by | Feb 23, 2024 | Dads, Latest News, School Jokes

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  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best Lord of the Rings jokes.
  2. I would tell some good Lord of the Rings jokes… But all the good ones ara-gone!
  3. Why are Hobbit doors round?… If you ate seven meals a day you’d need round doors too!
  4. The Hobbit pinball machine is AMAZING… It doesn’t accept any coins though, only a Tolkien.
  5. Movie Review: The Lord of the Rings: Group spends nine hours returning jewelry. (Movie Jokes)
  6. What is Gandalf’s favorite band?… The Eagles! (Bird Jokes & Music Jokes)
  7. Why did the Lord of the Rings author get kicked out of the movie theater… He was Tolkien all the way through! (Movie Jokes)
  8. I’m throwing a hobbit party… It’s just a little get-together.
  9. Did you know that all of the Hobbit films were recorded in L.A.?… Yeah, you could tell by the Smaug. (California Jokes & Movie Jokes)
  10. I’m going to a Lord of the Rings themed Xmas party… I’m going to eat and be merry! (Christmas Jokes)
  11. A human, an elf and an orc walk into a bar…The Hobbit laughs and walks under it! (Elf Jokes & Beer Jokes)
  12. I went to an Apple Store and set up alarms on all of the phones…. I was Lord of the rings!
  13. What does Gandalf say when he wants to go shopping?… One ring to rule the mall! (Black Friday Jokes)
  14. What do you call a movie about a gangster hobbit? … Yolo Swaggins and the Fellowship of the Bling. (Movie Jokes)
  15. Lord of Rings Life Lesson: Man puts ring on finger, slowly goes insane! (Marriage Jokes & Psychology Jokes)
  16. Where do Hobbits ride horses?… At the Frodeo. (Horse Jokes & Texas Jokes)
  17. How did Frodo Baggins know when his neighbor had died?… He read it in the Hobbituary. (Cemetery Jokes)
  18. I like it when people call me Precious… It has such a nice ring to it!
  19. Why did the Best Man go to Mount Doom?… Because he was the Ring-bearer! (Marriage Jokes)
  20. What did Gandalf say when an onion tried to cross the bridge?… You shallot pass! (Onion Jokes)
  21. What time did Tolkien finish Lord of the Rings?… At elven o’clock! (Elf Jokes)
  22. Hey, Gandalf! What’s your favorite kind of insect?… FLY, YOU FOOLS!
  23. What do you call a balrog wearing earmuffs?… Anything you want – it can’t hear you!
  24. How do you cross a troll bridge in Middle Earth?… You use J.R.R. tokens!
  25. My teacher must really like Lord of the Rings… Whenever I ask about my grades she just says “You shall not pass!”
  26. How did the hobbit ruin the boxing match?… He tried to destroy the ring! (Boxing Jokes)
  27. What is the best book to read in autumn?… Gourd of the Rings. (Book Jokes & Lord of the Rings Jokes)
  28. I was once obsessed with “The Lord of the Rings.” The books, the movies, the collectables, everything… Finally I was able to kick the hobbit. (Movie Jokes & Psychology Jokes)
  29. Dancing trees?… Now that’s ENT-ertainment. (Tree Jokes & Dance Jokes)
  30. What do you call a Lord of Rings fan with a sprained ankle?… A hobblit.
  31. You think Harry Potter is better than Lord of Rings… Tolkien must be Rowling in his grave… (Harry Potter Jokes)
  32. Which Lord of the Rings character has no toys to play with?… Legoless! (Lego Jokes)
  33. Why was Gandalf hunched over and stressed out?… He was short-staffed! (Labor Day Jokes)
  34. I bought myself a 6 foot boomerang with Lord of the Rings characters on it… It’s really hard to Frodo!
  35. Bruce Willis has been cast to play the lead role in the upcoming Lord of the Rings sequel… Old Hobbits Die Hard. (Movie Jokes)
  36. Robert de Niro is playing the lead role in the upcoming movie about “The Lord of the Rings” trilogy. The movie is called “You Tolkien to me?” (Movie Jokes)
  37. I did a Lord of the Rings marathon yesterday…. I ran 26 miles dressed up as Frodo Baggins! (Marathon Jokes)
  38. What was Frodo at Aragorn and Arwen’s wedding?… The Ring-bearer! (Marriage Jokes & Wedding Jokes)
  39. What do you call a hobbit eating at KFC?… Lord of the Wings. (Chicken Jokes)
  40. Why can’t you stop making Frodo gnome garden statues?… Because it’s so hobbit forming! (Gardening Jokes)
  41. Do you think Daniel Radcliffe could ever play a hobbit?… No, but Elijah Would! (Harry Potter Jokes)
  42. I’ve been reading ‘Lord Of The Rings’ and apparently, Gollum was once a normal man, but wearing the ring drained him of his youth, energy and any joy in life… Must be the same ring I put on when I got married. (Marriage Jokes)
  43. Three movies are a bit much for The Hobbit… They seem to be really dragon it out! (Dragon Jokes)
  44. Why did they come out with a Lord of the Rings movie?…The fans were Baggins for it.
  45. I belong to a Lord of the Rings Society, and we have a secret sign… It is a Tolkien gesture.
  46. Hand. Hand. River. Dirt. Gollum. Hobbits. Pockets. Pockets. Finger. Envelope. Fire. Hand. Neck. Neck. Finger. Hobbits. Neck. Neck. Neck. Pocket. Finger. LAVA… The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, from the perspective of the ring. (Movie Jokes)
  47. Why should you try to be nice to a hobbit?… Because he’s got a short temper.
  48. Hobbits are really good people… they don’t look down on anyone.
  49. Why don’t you ask a hobbit for money?… Because they are always a little short.
  50. What do you call a Hobbit with a healthy appetite?… Lord of the Onion Rings! (Fast Food Jokes)