Marine Jokes

by | May 25, 2021 | Education, Latest News, School Jokes

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  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best dessert jokes.
  2. My grandfather was a baker in the Marines… He went in all buns glazing.
  3. My Granddad fought in the war and survived mustard gas and pepper spray… He’s now classed as a seasoned veteran.
  4. What do you call a military tree who doesn’t return on time?… Absent without leaf. (Tree Jokes)
  5. What do you call a house with an ice-cream sundae on top?… Beats me… “Desserted!” (Ice Cream Jokes)
  6. Did you know you can’t eat ice cream in the military?… Apparently you get arrested for desserting. (Ice Cream Jokes)
  7. Why did the soldier stuff himself with ice cream? He was a desserter. (Ice Cream Jokes)
  8. An ice cream, a creme brulee, and a slice of cheesecake joined the army, but they abandoned their fellow soldiers on their first deployment They are wanted for dessertion. (Ice Cream Jokes)
  9. Why are there no knock knock jokes about America?… Because freedom rings! (Memorial Day Knock Knock Jokes)
  10. Where does the Navy rank amongst the armed forces?… Submarines. (Marine Jokes)
  11. I tried out for the Marines but fell just short of their requirements. So they put me in the Navy since I was a sub-marine. (Marine Jokes)
  12. What do you call a Marine who joins the Navy?… A Sub-Marine.
  13. I became a chef after I left the Marines… Some would say I am a seasoned veteran. (Labor Day Jokes & Veterans Day Jokes)
  14. Have you heard about the karate champion who joined the marines?… The first time he saluted, he nearly killed himself! (Veterans Day Jokes & Karate Jokes)
  15. Knock, knock?… Who is there?… August… August Who?… A gusta join the Marines. (August Knock Knock Jokes)
  16. A small boy was staring at the names on the wall of an old church when the pastor noticed him. “What are you looking at?” asked the clergyman. “All those names. Who are they?” the boy asked. The pastor nodded, and said, “They are the reason we have Memorial Day. They are those who died in the service.” The little boy considered that, then asked quietly, “The 9 o’clock service or the 11 o’clock?” (Cemetery Jokes)
  17. What is a cow’s favorite holiday?… Moomorial day. (Cow Jokes)
  18. Who won the zombie war?…Nobody, it was dead even. (Zombie Jokes)
  20. Navy / Air Force / Marine / Space Force / Coast Guard jet pilot: This is it! We’re flying faster than the speed of sound! Copilot: What? (Pilot Jokes & Plane Jokes)
  21. Army Navy / Air Force / Marine / Space Force / Coast Guard soldiers can’t comprehend the 6-foot social distancing requirement… But everyone in the navy can fathom it. (Army Jokes)
  22. What did the Navy say to the Navy / Air Force / Marine / Space Force / Coast Guard?… “I’ll SEAL you later.” (Seal Jokes & Coast Guard Jokes)
  23. I became a chef after I left the Navy / Air Force / Marine / Space Force / Coast Guard.. Some would say I am a seasoned veteran. (Labor Day Jokes & Veterans Day Jokes)
  24. The navy / Coast Guard is beginning to recruit blind men… They are sending them out to sea.
  25. Have you heard about the karate champion who joined the Navy / Air Force / Marine / Space Force / Coast Guard?… The first time he saluted, he nearly killed himself! (Veterans Day Jokes & Karate Jokes)
  26. A cool job that sounds lame: Building boats for the navy /Coast gaurd… You’d be a subcontractor. (Labor Day Jokes)
  27. Dad: You wanna join the navy? You can’t even swim! Son: no one can fly in the Air Force either. (Dad Jokes)
  28. I’m about to lose my job in the Navy Cost Guard unless I make some drastic changes… I have to take a course in anchor management. (Labor Day Jokes & Psychology Jokes)
  29. What happens when you eat too many Navy Navy / Air Force / Marine / Space Force / Coast Guard beans?… You might end up with a dishonorable discharge.
  30. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good Navy knock-knock joke?
  31. Did you know Navy Coast Guard ships run on commercial batteries?… They run on 7 C’s.
  32. Each branch has a military ball (Navy Ball, Army Ball, etc.) And it warms my heart to know that one branch will be having “Space Balls” from here on out. (Dance Jokes & Astronomy Jokes)
  33. Who’s the head of the penguin navy?… Admiral Byrd! (Bird Jokes & Navy Jokes)
  34. Why are there no knock knock jokes about America?… Because freedom rings! (Memorial Day Knock Knock Jokes)
  35. What is a cow’s favorite holiday?… Moomorial day. (Cow Jokes)
  36. Who won the zombie war?…Nobody, it was dead even. (Zombie Jokes)
  37. What did Galaga aliens and WW2 Navy Coast Guard officers have in common?… Both came in WAVES.