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More Cookie Jokes…

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  1. Knock knockout?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best cookie jokes.
  2. Why is it so easy to track Santa on Christmas Eve?… Because he always accepts cookies. (Christmas Eve Jokes)
  3. My grandmother bakes cookies the fastest… It literally takes her nana-seconds. (Grandparent Jokes)
  4. How does the Cookie Monster pay for his cookies?… With Cookie Dough. (Sesame Street Jokes)
  5. Why do we cook bacon and bake cookies? (Bacon Jokes)
  6. I tried to start an online bakery… But I accidentally deleted all my cookies. (Labor Day Jokes & Computer Jokes)
  7. What does a grandmother and a website have in common?… You can’t deny the cookies. (Grandparent Jokes)
  8. Why do you think grandpa says that his wife makes cookies the fastest?… Because she just takes nana-seconds to bake them. (Grandparent Jokes)
  9. Did you hear the field trip joke about the cookie?… It is crummy. (Field Trip Jokes)
  10. What is Homer Simpson’s favorite ice cream?… Cookie d’oh! (Ice Cream Jokes)
  11. & Computer Jokes)
  12. When should you take a chocolate chip cookie to the doctor?… When it feels crummy. (Doctor Jokes for Kids & Chocolate Chip Cookie Jokes)
  13. What’s a pirate’s favorite kind of cookie?… ships ahoy! (Pirate Jokes)
  14. I ate too much cookie dough and got sick… It was an overdoughse. (Doctor Jokes for Kids)
  15. I got a fortune cookie without a fortune in it today… How unfortunate…
  16. What kind of keys do kids like to carry?… Chocolate Chip Cookies! (Chocolate Chip Cookie Jokes)
  17. What does the ginger bread man put on his bed?… A cookie sheet. (Christmas Jokes & Christmas Trivia)
  18. What did the Hershey’s bar, the marshmallow, and the cookie use to communicate?… S’mores Code! (Candy Jokes)
  19. Why do basketball players love chocolate chip cookies?… Because they can dunk them! (Basketball JokesCoaching Youth BasketballYouth Basketball 101)
  20. Why did the thief rob the Keebler Elves?… Because they had a lot of dough!
  21. What’s the best kind of cookie to hand out on Halloween?… Ghoul scout cookies!
  22. What is Santa’s favorite computer task?… Clearing cookies!
  23. Why couldn’t the Cookie Monster make his bed?… He couldn’t find a cookie sheet!
  24. Raisin Cookies That Look Like Chocolate Chip Cookies Are The Reason I Have Trust Issues!
  25. What is a monkey’s favorite cookie?… Chocolate chimp! (Monkey Jokes for Kids)
  26. Why doesn’t Cookie Monster have good internet privacy?… He always accepts the cookies.
  27. According to my fortune cookie I am getting a dolphin!… It said my life will have a purpose.
  28. What do you call a cookie that draws funny pictures?… A Snickerdoodle!
  29. What did Homer Simpson say when he dropped a plate of cookies?… Dough!
  30. What do you get when you use a deer-shaped cookie cutter?… Cookie doe!
  31. What’s was the cookies favorite band?… OREO Speedwagon… (I heard it from a friend, who heard it from a friend…)
  32. If I have 10 cookies and you take 5, what do you have?… A broken hand.
  33. How do you make a baby computer cry?… Delete his cookies!
  34. What’re the most popular cookies in Asgard?… Thoreos.
  35. What do you call a batch of dropped cookies?… Flooreos!
  36. What do the chocolate chip cookie and the computer have in common?… They both have chips.
  37. What would you get if you crossed the Stars and Stripes with a cookie?… A Flag Newton! (Flag Day Jokes)
  38. Why did the chocolate chip cookie cry?… Because his mother was a wafer so long! (Mother’s Day Joke for Kids)
  39. What do you call a thief who robs the Keebler Elves?… A crook-ie!
  40. This site uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience on the site. By continuing to use the site, you agree to accept these cookies. I genuinely just copied and pasted this off the weight watchers website.
  41. Why do girls scouts sell chocolate chip cookies?… They wanna make a sweet first impression.
  42. I just burnt 2500 calories This is the last time I take a nap while baking cookies.
  43. What do you call it when two cookies from the same sheet fall in love?… A batch made in heaven!
  44. I still remember my first fortune cookie… …and how much it tasted like paper.
  45. Why did the shipwrecked pirates get to eat cakes, cookies and pies when they washed up on shore?… It was a desserted island.
  46. I was just on a diabetes awareness website and it asked me if I accept cookies… Is that a trick question?
  47. What do you call an oatmeal raisin cookie baked at 666 degrees?… Raisin hell!
  48. Gilligan eats the last package of cookies on the island. Ginger snaps.
  49. Just got to get this off my chest…. I’m getting sick and tired of people complaining about the price of things, $2.70 for coffee, $1.50 a cookie, $4.00 an hour for parking. If I hear any more moaning.. I’m stopping inviting people to my house.
  50. What is invisible and smells like milk and cookies?… Santa’s burps! (Christmas Jokes)
  51. More Cookie Jokes
  52. What cookie makes you rich?… A fortune cookie!
  53. Why did the Oreo cookie go to the dentist?… Because it lost its filling. (Dentist Jokes & Top Moms On Twitter)
  54. What is a monster’s favorite food?… Ghoul scout cookies. (Halloween Jokes)
  55. What is green and brown and crawls through the grass?… A Girl Scout who has lost her cookie.
  56. Why did the chocolate chip cookie drop all his chips?… Because that’s the way the cookie fumbles!
  57. If you give a mouse a cookie… He’s going to ask if he can use it to improve your internet browsing experience.
  58. What type of cookies do redheads like best?… Ginger snaps!
  59. What type of cookies do the Weasely’s like best?… Ginger snaps!
  60. Why do we cook bacon and bake cookies? (Bacon Jokes)
  61. What does a long pole eat?… Flag newtons. (Flag Day Jokes)
  62. The fortune cookie I got with my chinese food today was weird… It said, ”FREE ME FROM THIS FACTORY Lucky Numbers 23.5° N, 121.0° E”
  63. Why did the chocolate chip cookie cry?… Because his mother was a wafer so long! (Mother’s Day Joke for Kids)
  64. What’s a hyena’s favorite cookie? Snickerdoodle.
  65. Me: Three scoops of Cookie Dough in a tub, please. Vendor: You wanna spoon? Me: … OK, what time do you get off?
  66. What does a programmer say after reading the fortune they get from a fortune cookie? Embed
  67. New Supermarket A new supermarket opened in Phoenix. It has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain. When you pass the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and you experience the scent of fresh mown hay. In the meat department there is the aroma of charcoal grilled steaks with onions. When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying. The bread department features the tantalizing smell of fresh baked bread and cookies. I don’t buy toilet paper there anymore.
  68. Did you hear about mrs. fortune cookies divorce?… Now she’s misfortune cookie.
  69. If you have 10 cookies and split them evenly between your friends how many cookies do you have?… 10 cookies!
  70. I brought some cookie dough into work today… …so I could use the oven there to bake some cookies for all the staff, but everyone gave me dirty looks when I put them in and turned the oven on. My boss said I was “insensitive” and “fired from the crematorium.” (Labor Day Jokes)
  71. A nervous passenger decided to purchase flight insurance at the ticket counter. She had some time before the flights departure, so she stopped in a Chinese restaurant in the concourse. She started to shake as she read her fortune cookie: “Today’s investment will pay big dividends!” (Plane Jokes)
  72. There’s a new machine at the gym, it does absolutely everything Soft drinks, potato chips, chocolate cookies and candy.
  73. There is a man, he is dying in his bed in his home. He smells something amazing. It’s the smell of his favorite chocolate chip cookies. And with his last strength, he gets out of bed, and he goes to the kitchen, where his wife of 50 years, is cooking these beautiful chocolate chip cookies. And they are on a plate of four of them, just out of the oven. And with his last human strength, he reaches over to take one of the cookies, and his wife sees him, she rushes over, she slaps his hand, and she says, “No, they are for the funeral.” (Grandparent Jokes)
  74. Cookie Thieves… They really take the biscuit.
  75. Just went on the Weight Watchers website. How come they want you to accept cookies?
  76. I found one of the leftover cookies crying He was sad because his mom has been a wafer a long time.
  77. What is a cannibals favorite type of cookie? Lady fingers.
  78. What does a witch use to bake cookies? An Easy Bake Coven
  79. Insecure people are like chocolate chip cookies After they get baked, they’ll crumble easily.
  80. If you were a food what would you be? Friend 1-Pizza cause I’m so cheesy Friend 2-Chocolate chip cookie cause I have lots of friends Me-donut cause I’m so empty inside
  81. I was trying to poison Santa, but he killed my dad and ate all the cookies!
  82. What did the baker say when he forgot the cookie sheets?… Ooh,snicker doodles.
  83. I told a cookie a joke the other day… It just crumbled
  84. What’s a unemployed person’s favorite cookie?… Pooreo’s.
  85. What kind of cookies do rich people like best?… Fortune cookies!
  86. What did the cookie say when he jumped off the cliff?… Crumbs!
  87. What kind of cookies do vampires prefer?… No-stake cookies!
  88. Why did the Oreo cookie visit the dentist?… To get his filling replaced!
  89. What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?… A cookie sheet!
  90. What do ducks have for lunch?… Soup and quackers.
  91. What do ducks put in their soup?… Quackers.
  92. What does a dragon eat for a snack?… Firecrackers.
  93. What kind of keys does everyone like to carry?… Cookies.
  94. Why did the cookie go to the nurse?… Because he felt crummy!
  95. What is a monster’s favorite Halloween food?… Ghoul scout cookies!
  96. What’s a monsters favorite meal that comes to the door on Halloween?… A girl scout with cookies!
  97. What did the Gingerbread Man put on for Halloween?… A cookie sheet!
  98. What type of keys do kid skeletons like to carry on Halloween?… Cookies!
  99. How can you tell when someone not so smart been baking Halloween chocolate chip cookies?… There’s M&M shells all over the floor!
  100. Why did the zombie go to the doctor after eating a cookie?… It was feeling crummy!
  101. Why did the monster cookie cry?… Because his mother was a wafer so long!
  102. What cookie do poor kids want for Halloween?… A fortune cookie!
  103. Why do basketball players love apple cookies?… Because they can dunk them!
  104. What is green and brown and crawls through the grass?… A Girl Scout zombie who has lost her cookie!
  105. What kind of snack do little monkeys have with their milk?… Chocolate chimp cookies!
  106. Why do ghoul scouts sell Halloween cookies?…They wanna make a sweet first impression! !
  107. Why did the kids clean out the cookie jar?… To make room for the Halloween candy!
  108. Why did Cookie monster mash up is computer?… He was looking for chips to put in his cookies!
  109. Have you ever met a little monster that doesn’t eat cookies?… Neither have I!
  110. How do you know your Halloween cookies are prefect?… The fire alarm is cheering you on!
  111. If you had 10 cookies and a zombie ate half. Do you know what you have?… A dead zombie!
  112. What’s the best thing to put into a Halloween cookie?… Your teeth!
  113. Did you hear the joke about the Halloween cookie?…I’m not telling you. It might crumble apart!
  114. Cookie shop assistant, will my giant Halloween cookie be long?… No sir, it will be round!
  115. What is white, has a horn, and is full of milk?…A monster milk cookie!
  116. What kind of cookie do elves make for Halloween? … Short Bread Cookies!
  117. How do you scare kids in a gingerbread costume on Halloween?… Show them the swimming pool full of milk!
  118. If a monster has 13 giant chocolate chip Halloween cookies in one hand and 10 super large orange covered Halloween cookies in the other, what do you have?… A monster with big hands!
  119. On Halloween eve I was making Halloween cookies for my family to be a surprise but the fire trucks ruined it!
  120. A cookie rolls into a bar and asks for something to drink. The bartender says, “Sorry, we do not serve food.”
  121. My annual performance review says I lack “passion & intensity,” guess management hasn’t seen me alone with a big plate of chocolate chip cookies! (Labor Day Jokes)
  122. Knock, Knock… Who’s there?… Cook… Cook who?… Cookie!
  123. Knock, Knock… Who’s there?… Cookie… Cookie who?… Cookie Monster!
  124. Knock, Knock… Who’s there?… I’m… I’m who?… I’m here to empty the cookie jar!
  125. Knock, Knock… Who’s there?… Do… Do who?… Do you have a Halloween cookie for me!
  126. Knock, Knock… Who’s there?… Give Give who?… Give us all your doe, cookie!
  127. Why can’t cookies dough hold a steady job?… Because it’s always getting baked. (Labor Day Jokes)