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Top U.S. History Jokes & Constitution Jokes
- Knock knockout?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best jokes about the Constitution.
- What did Thomas Jefferson do before signing the Declaration of Independence?… He did a pre-ramble. (4th of July Jokes)
- Say what you want about the 1st amendment…
- I was in the middle of a lake in a canoe with my girlfriend last week when suddenly the boat sprung a leak. We had to decide whether to try and get the boat back to shore or abandon ship. We had a real row v. wade debate that day. (Canoe Jokes)
- Did you hear they passed a law banning ice cream?… Don’t worry, it was ruled un-cone-stitutional! (Ice Cream Jokes & Lawyer Jokes)
- How was George Washington able to be so healthy?… He had a strong constitution. (George Washington Jokes)
- I got caught with a copy of the Constitution… I swear I read it for the articles. (Constitution Jokes)
- I’m not sure I can tell you word-for-word what the 2nd Amendment is… But I’ll take a shot at it!
- I went to the NRA and told them the 2nd amendment is worthless… They were triggered.
- How is a healthy person like the United States?… They both have good constitutions! (Doctor Jokes)
- “The Constitution says I have the right to bear arms,” I told the officer and he said, “Where’s the rest of the bear?” (Bear Jokes & Police Jokes)
- Why did Yogi like the second amendment?… Because he loved his bear arms. (Bear Jokes)
- Second Amendment If you are against the second amendment… you could get fired. (Labor Day Jokes)
- What’s a bird’s favorite amendment?… Freedom of SCREECH! (Bird Jokes)
- I can’t believe the girls at school can’t wear tank tops, it totally violates the second amendment… Don’t they have a right to bare arms? (Jokes for Teachers & High School Jokes)
- I’ve been told I have a Supreme Court figure… No appeal. (Lawyer Jokes)
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about the Constitution? (Social Studies Jokes)
- What did the Constitution say to the interrogator?… “I was framed!”
- My wife and I hung a copy of the US Constitution in our house… We call it the decoration of independence.
- There’s an amendment in America for people to wear T-shirts… I call it “The Right To Bare Arms.”
- What’s the first amendment in Super Mario’s constitution?… Freedom of Peach. (Georgia Jokes)
- The gyms must remain open… The Constitution guarantees freedom of the press.
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good Constitution knock-knock joke? (June Jokes)
- Between the First Amendment’s freedom of assembly and the Eighth Amendment’s no cruel and unusual punishment, the US Constitution is basically saying… “some assembly required, battery not included.”
- Why couldn’t Hillary Clinton keep up her US presidential campaign?… She was let down by a weak Constitution. (Election Jokes)
- Similarities and differences between the Canadian and Chinese constitution… Both have freedom of speech but only one has freedom after speech. (World Geography Jokes)
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good Constitution knock knock jokes? (June Jokes & Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
- Why did the hunter cut off the grizzly bear’s arms?… Because according to the 2nd amendment…..the hunter has the right to bear arms. (Hunting Jokes & Bear Jokes)
- My wife’s dad just beat me in a race to read the entire constitution… I got quite far, but he’s farther in law.
- I’m glad I have my 2nd Amendment right to bear arms… Otherwise, I’d have been amputated at birth. (Baby Jokes)
- Americans love frozen fruit so much, they wrote it into the constitution… The 1st amendment is the right to freeze peach.
- Maybe if we all emailed the Constitution to each other… …the NSA will finally read it.
- My son asked why i climbed above the constitution… I said that I wanted to be above the law
- What dance was very popular in 1776?… Indepen-dance! (American Revolution Jokes & Music Jokes)
- What would you get if you crossed the American national bird with Snoopy?… A bald beagle! (Bird Jokes)
- What would you get if you crossed the first US president with an animated character?… George Washingtoon!
- I received a letter the other day saying my tax return was ‘outstanding’. Although it’s lovely to receive such high praise from HMRC, to be honest I can’t even remember sending one in.
- If George Washington, Ben Franklin, James Madison and Alexander Hamilton play D&D, do they roll for constitution?
- My wife caught me looking at a copy of the Constitution yesterday. I said, “Honey, I’m only reading it for the Articles.”
- I can amputate grizzly limbs if I want to… The constitution gives me the right to bear arms.
- A sign says: move over for stationary emergency vehicles. Dad says: what constitutes a stationary emergency? I’m out of letterhead and all my pencils are broken.
- Someone should tell trump and his fellow Republicans that the constitution isn’t a bible… You can’t pick and choose which parts you want to obey.
- What are the first three words of the Constitution of the Vatican?… We the papal…
- Is it a coincidence that the 18th amendment of the US Constitution outlawed alcohol while the 21st made it legal again?
- With all the political debate raging in the U.S. right now, I thought it would be constructive to briefly review the first article in the Constitution It’s “the.”
- The United States would be a very weak country in Dungeons & Dragons… They only have 1 Constitution.
- Donald Trump tweeted the he wants to resign today. But it was a typo. He tweeted moments later he wants to re-sign the U.S Constitution with only his name on it.
- Gee I sure hope the rioters in DC don’t do anything to the IRS building… at 1111 Constitution Ave. NW, Washington, DC 20224.
- The Second Amendment of the Constitution affords me the right to wear short sleeve shirts to work… The right to bare arms.