My Town Tutors is a great resource for parents & teachers. Find qualified tutors in your area today!

Google Search “Maryland Jokes”

  1. Knock knock?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best Maryland jokes.
  2. Maryland Tourism: We have the crabs you will love.
  3. What’s the happiest state in the union?… Merry-land!
  4. If George Washington were alive today, why couldn’t he throw a silver dollar across the Potomac?… Because a dollar doesn’t go as far as it used to. (Presidents Day Jokes & George Washington Jokes)
  5. Maryland: If it weren’t for Washington… you couldn’t find us.
  6. Did you hear the joke about the Appalachian Mountains?… You won’t get over it. (Hiking Jokes & Maryland Mountains)
  7. A woman from Maryland who fell in love with the DJ from her first wedding day has married him five years later… she originally asked him three years ago, but he said he wasn’t taking requests just then. (Marriage Jokes)
  8. You’re from Maryland?… Please tell me all you know about lacrosse and crabs.
  9. Maryland Drivers: Amazing, but everyone is crazy when there is one drop of snow.
  10. What is the nautical chart of the Atlantic Ocean’s best pitch?… The depth curve. (Baseball Jokes)
  11. What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the shore?… Nothing, it just waved!
  12. Can you name the capital of Maryland?… “M”
  13. What did Deep Creek Lake say to the shore?… Nothing, it waved. (15 Best Lakes in Maryland)
  14. What is the tallest building in?… Maryland Public Library of course, it has the most stories! (Library Jokes)
  15. What goes hundreds of miles and never moves?… The Maryland Turnpike!
  16. Where do a fish keep their money?… In the riverbanks of the Susquehanna River. (Ten Longest Rivers in Maryland)
  17. What has a mouth but can’t eat?… The Potomac River!
  18. What runs but never goes out of breath?… The Youghiogheny River! (Geography Jokes for Kids)
  19. If a plane crashed on the borders of Maryland where would they bury the survivors?… You wouldn’t bury them anywhere because survivors are the people who lived! 
  20. Maryland. Teacher: Which part? Student: What do you mean, ‘which part’? My whole body was born in Maryland! (Teacher Jokes)
  21. Why did the Maryland teacher jump into the Deep Creek Lake?… She wanted to test the water! (Teacher Jokes & Top Maryland Lakes)
  22. Tourist: “Lived in this town all your life?” Maryland Resident: “No, not yet.”
  23. Tourist: “Nice little town — so old and quaint. Must be a lot of odd characters around here, though, right?” Maryland Resident: “Oh yes, quite a few. You see ’em around. But they’re mostly gone after Labor Day.” (Labor Day Jokes & Travel Blogs)
  24. Why did the Maryland teacher jump into the Potomac River?… She wanted to test the water! (Teacher Jokes & Swimming Jokes for Kids)
  25. What did Maryland see?… the same thing Arkansas.
  26. A cowboy and his blind horse: A man is casually crossing the Maryland plains when his horse died all of the sudden. The nearest town was three days walk. So, he started to walk. 3 days later he ends up in this quiet ‘ol town but nobody had a horse for sale. So he commenced to walking to the closest town which was a two days journey. Unfortunately, nobody in that town had a horse for sale, however, he did come across this stable where the fellow runnin’ it mentioned his brother in a nearby Town had a horse for sale. He commenced to walk to this next town and 2 DAYS LATER found the guy’s brother. “I talked to your brother two days walk from here and he says you might have a horse to sell me.” “Yes I do have a horse for sale,” He replied, “But he don’t look so good.” “I don’t care. I’ll take him anyways. I’ve been walking for damn near a week now. I’m tired and I need a horse.” So he gets on the horse and the horse takes off and bumps into a tree and stops. “Heyyy, something’s wrong with this horse. I think he’s blind. YOU SOLD ME A BLIND HORSE MISTER!” “I told you Sir, THE HORSE DON’T LOOK SO GOOD!”
  27. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the University of Maryland mascot? (College Mascots)
  28. Where do Maryland elementary school sports teams buy their uniforms?… New Jersey? (Elementary School Jokes)
  29. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about Maryland?
  30. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good Maryland knock-knock joke?
  31. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good Maryland knock knock jokes?
  32. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe spell Maryland? 
  33. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the colleges and universities in Maryland? (Top U.S. Colleges)
  34. If a plane crashed on the borders of Maryland and Pennsylvania, where would they bury the survivors?… You wouldn’t bury them anywhere because survivors are the people who lived! (Geography Jokes for Kids & Plane Jokes)
  35. If a plane crashed on the borders of Maryland and Virginia, where would they bury the survivors?… You wouldn’t bury them anywhere because survivors are the people who lived! (Geography Jokes for Kids & Plane Jokes)
  36. If a plane crashed on the borders of Maryland and West Virginia, where would they bury the survivors?… You wouldn’t bury them anywhere because survivors are the people who lived! (Geography Jokes for Kids & Plane Jokes)
  37. If a plane crashed on the borders of Maryland and Delaware, where would they bury the survivors?… You wouldn’t bury them anywhere because survivors are the people who lived! (Geography Jokes for Kids & Plane Jokes)
  38. Where do Maryland middle school sports teams buy their uniforms?… New Jersey? (Middle School Jokes)
  39. Where do Maryland middle school sports teams buy their uniforms?… New Jersey? (Middle School Jokes)
  40. Where do Maryland high school sports teams buy their uniforms?… New Jersey? (High School Jokes)
  41. Why did the Alabama teacher jump into the lake?… She wanted to test the water! (Teacher Jokes & Swimming Jokes for Kids)
  42. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name any professional sports teams in Maryland? 
  43. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the capital of Maryland? (State Capitals)
  44. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the most populated city in Maryland?  
  45. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the least populated city in Maryland?  
  46. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the highest mountain in Maryland? (Hiking Jokes)  
  47. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the longest river in Maryland?  
  48. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the two senators from Maryland? 
  49. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the governor of Maryland?
  50. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe who?… Canoe name the representatives from Maryland?