(Retirement Jokes)
- Where did Avogadro’s retire?… Mole – Bile, Alabama. (Alabama Jokes & Retirement Jokes)
- The government says I can’t get my pension yet, as I am only 22. I hate being born on a leap year… All my friends are 88. (Leap Year Jokes)
- What confirmed the fact that Grandpa should retire?… When he stopped lying about his age and switched to boasting about it.
- Tom Brady retired, but he does so as the GOAT, with 7 Super Bowls, but more importantly, he’s 5x better than Nickelback. …he’s a quarterback. (365 Music Jokes & Retirement Jokes)
- Why don’t Americans worry about Friday the 13th?… After losing their home, job, and 401k nothing scares them anymore!
- Lobster Pun: At a retirement party, one lobster told his colleague that he was one shell of a guy.
- Lobster Pun: The lobster said it’d be hard for him to retire… as he was tide to his company.
- I’ve decided to retire as a librarian… to start a new chapter in my life. (Retirement Jokes & Library Jokes)
- Alligators can live up to 100 years which is why there’s an increased chance that… …they will see you later! (Alligator Jokes & Retirement Jokes)
- How do you play Air Force Bingo?… “A-10… B-52… F-16!” (Air Force Jokes & Plane Jokes)
- Ski Pun: Old skiers go downhill fast. (Ski Puns & Retirement Jokes)
- What is an old person’s favorite flavor of gum?… Retire-Mint.
- Why was the peanut butter upset about his retirement party?… He was roasted!
- I’ve retired, and I find I’m a perfect fit for this job! (Labor Day Jokes)
- I went to an ocean themed (retirement / graduation / birthday / prom) party… It was a whale of a time. (Whale Jokes)
- What did the hippocampus say when it retired?… “Thanks for the memories.” (Daylight Savings Jokes)
- A retired Utah man was jailed for refusing to nap… …he was resisting a rest. (Napping Jokes & Retirement Jokes)
