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Top Joke Pages:
- Knock knockout?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best beard jokes.
- “I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.” Dad (Father’s Day Jokes)
- Who shaves 10 times a day and still has a beard?… The barber. (Barber Jokes)
- Dear Disney, why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard? (Disney Jokes)
- What do you call a goat with a beard?… Goatee. (Animal Jokes)
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe you teach me how to shave my beard. (Canoe Jokes)
- What US president had long legs, a beard, and an unusual smell?… Abraham Stinkin.
- Why don’t men with beards need vacuums?… They already have crumb catchers.
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about beards? (Summer Olympic Knock Knock Jokes)
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good beard knock-knock joke?
- Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know any good beard knock knock jokes? (June Jokes & Spring Knock Knock Jokes)
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe you shave my beard. (Canoe Jokes)
- What do you call a bald chemistry teacher with only a beard? Heisenbeeard.
- Why was the bearded man angry?… Because he kept being mistaken for a hipster
- What happened to the man who was hesitant about growing a beard?… It eventually grew on him.
- Why was the bearded man with low self-esteem happy going out with his nonbearded friends?… Because everyone thought he was the leader!
- Where does a man with a beard put his beard clippings?… In his shavings account.
- My friend and I are in a beard-growing contest… It’s neck and neck right now.
- What is a beard’s favorite nuts?… Mustachios.
- What is a bearded man’s favorite headphone brand?… Bearddynamic.
- What is an old and wise dragon?… A bearded dragon!
- Why don’t the Amish shave their beards?… Because they don’t want raze-a-barn.
- What did the man with a beard call his pottery shop?… Hairy Potter.
- How many bearded men does it take to change a lightbulb?… Ten. One to actually do the job, and nine others to compliment each other’s beards.
- Why did Abe Lincoln grow a beard?… He wanted to look like that guy on the five-dollar bill.
- Why did the man with receding hairline decide to grow his beard?… Because he was trying to plan a head.
- Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe, who?… Canoe you teach me how to shave. (Canoe Jokes)
- How did the barber win the race?… He took a short cut. (Track & Field Jokes)
- What do you call someone who shaves 50 times a day but still has a beard?… A Barber!
- What do you call someone who shaves 50 times a day but still has a beard?… A Barber!
- What is something a bearded guy never sees again?… His chin!
- What sports team is hated by all beard lovers?… The LA Clippers! Why did the bearded guy shave only half his face?… He was shaving it for later!
- What is a barber’s favorite food?… Barber-que!
- Why is it the bearded man in jail?… He was sued for hair-assment!
- What is the best nut?… A Mustachio!
- Why did the balding bearded man shave his head?… He was trying to plan a head!
- Where do you find the perfect mustache?… Right under your nose! What do you say before you shave your beard off?… “Hair goes nothing!”
- What musician has the best beard?… Hairy Garcia!
- What’s the last thing the barber said to his client before he finished his best cut ever?… “All good things must comb to an end.”
- Why are barbers considered superheroes?… They are always there to shave the day!
- Why didn’t the man shave his beard?… It grew on him?
- Why didn’t the man shave his beard?… He became attached to it!
- Why did the princess choose the bearded prince over the clean-shaven prince?… She wanted a hairy-tale ending!
- What did Darth Vader change his name to when he became a stylist?… Darth Braider
- Why did the barber replace his old razor?… Because it failed to make the cut!
- Why did the astronaut wait until he went into space to grow a beard?… He wanted spacial hair!
- Where do barbers put their clippings?… Their shavings account!
- My friend and I are in a beard growing competition but we aren’t sure who’s winning. It’s neck and neck right now!
- What do you call an event to buy new razors?… A fund-razor!
- Why do bearded guys take a long time to eat their food?… They want to shaver every bite!
- Why are lions really good at hunting?… It’s their mane source of income!
- What do you call a man who can’t grow a beard?… A boy!
- What is a captain’s favorite beard style?… A boat-tee!
- What do you call a polite beard?… Well-groomed!
- What do doctors and beard have in common?… They both need patience!
- What do beards eat for breakfast?… Scruffins!
- Why did the man maintain his beard to perfection?… Because if he didn’t, things would get a bit hairy.
- What’s the difference between an ex-wife and a beard?… The beard eventually comes back.
- Why did the man have the priest don a fake beard and mustache?… Because he wanted the baptism to be a blessing in disguise!
- Why do women like men with beards?… Because they immediately see something that they can change!
- Why do men hate to shave off their beards?… Because they’re naturally attached to it.
- Why did the bearded man’s shaving product business flop?… Because of the razor thin margins.
- Why did the bearded man’s phone not unlock on seeing his face?… Because it just wasn’t him anymore!
- Why did the man who couldn’t grow a beard tape a rabbit to his face?… Because then he would get the facial hare he always wanted.
- Why did the bearded man decline the invitation to a charity event?… Because it was a fund razor.
- What did the beard say after growing back on the man’s face?… “I’ve been hair before!”
- Why did the man get beard oil before food?… Because taking care of his beard is part of his hair necessities.
- Why did the bearded man go to the barber?… Because the barber provided intensive hair.
- Why was the man who grew his beard for an entire year afraid of the barber?… Because the barber was the hairbinger of doom for him!
- Why did Satan hire a good-willed barber to shave off the facial hair of men going to hell?… Because the road to hell is shaved with good intentions.
- Why did the bearded man sue the barber who sneakily shaved off his beard?… Because he barber-ed a grudge against him.
- What did the bearded prince marry Rapunzel?… Because he wanted a hairytale ending.
- Why did the barber eat nothing but goat meat?… Because mutton chops were his favorite.
- Why did the toy airplane land on the bearded man’s face?… Because he had a strip on it.
- Why did the man get intentionally kicked in the face by a horse?… Because he wanted a horseshoe mustache.
- Why was the bearded man appointed as the sheriff in the town?… Because he had a gunslinger beard!
- Why do men develop confidence after growing their beards?… Because it’s the beard that grows them!
- Why was Ivan Pavlov’s beard so soft, smooth, and well maintained?… Because he classically conditioned it.
- Why is Santa not allowed to shave his beard?… Because it is in his Clause.
- What did the balding guy and teenager growing a beard have in common?… For them, every hair counts!
- When do hipsters shave their facial hair to match their cool personality?… During Daylight Shavings time.
- What was the pirate’s favorite kind of facial hair?… A boatee.
- What happened to the bearded clown after he was kicked out of the circus?… He lost his stubble mode of income.
- What did the man do when someone insulted his attempt at growing a beard?… He just brushed it off.
- Why did the man ignore the two hipsters tailing him and kept grooming his own beard?… Because a beard in the hand is worth two in the bush.
- What did the fancy bearded goat order at the café?… A Goa-tea.
- What was the bearded man’s least favorite basketball team?… The Los Angeles Clippers.
- Who is the world’s most popular bearded wizard?… It is Gandalf, who else did you think?
- Why did the bearded thief shave before robbing a bank?… Because he wanted to be a smooth criminal.
- Where does a beard stylist buy his grooming products?… At a Shaven Eleven.
- Why did the man grow his beard ridiculously bigger than the last time?… Because he wanted to grow it shavenfold as much..
- Why did the teenager get a grooming kit for his birthday?… Because it was his shaventeenth birthday.
- Why couldn’t the man with a thick beard figure out the cause of his itchy beard?… Because he couldn’t get to the root of it.
- Why did the man help his friends trim their facial hair?… Because shearing is caring.
- What did the man tell his chef friend with a beard?… “You ought to shavour every bite!”
- What do you call a barber without a beard?… Jobless!
- Who helped grow Obi Wan’s beard?… His name was Darth Braider!
- Why did the barber get annoyed by his customer?… Because he kept saying, “I mustache you a question!”
- Why did the man grow a mustache even though he always wore a mask in public?… Because he wanted a secret ‘stache.
- Why was the man annoyed at his friend who was making fun of his facial hair?… Because it was a side-burn.
- What was the catchphrase of the barber’s shop?… “Any time, Anyplace, Any hair!”