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Top Joke Pages: 180 School JokesFamily Joke of the DayMay Jokes for Kids

Top 10 May Pages / May Hashtag of the Day

Teacher Jokes


1. “A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops.” Henry Brooks Adams

2. “Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.” Nelson Mandela

3. “The direction in which education starts a man will determine his future life.” Plato

4. “I am learning all the time. The tombstone will be my diploma.” Ertha Kitt

5. “A teacher is one who makes himself progressively unnecessary.” Thomas Carruthers

6. “He who opens a school door, closes a prison.” Victor Hugo

7. In teaching you cannot see the fruit of a days work. It is invisible & remains so, maybe for 20 yrs. Jacques Barzun

8. “A teacher is a compass that activates the magnets of curiosity, knowledge, & wisdom in the pupils.” Ever Garrison9. “#Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.” Chinese Proverb

10. “Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” William James

The best of the rest!

  1. “Man’s mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions.” Oliver Wendell Holmes
  2. “The best #teachers teach from the heart, not from the book.” Unknown h
  3. “Teachers who inspire realize there will always be rocks in the road ahead of us. They will be stumbling blocks or stepping stones; it all depends on how we use them.” Unknown
  4. “What a teacher is, is more important than what he teaches.” Karl Menninger
  5. “You can teach a student a lesson for a day; but if you can teach him to learn by creating curiosity, he will continue the learning process as long as he lives.” Clay P. Bedford
  6. “All I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel Mother.” Abraham Lincoln
  7. “The object of teaching a child is to enable him to get along without his teacher.” Elbert Hubbard
  8. “Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.” Chinese Proverb
  9. “Teaching is leaving a vestige of oneself in the development of another. And surely the student is a bank where you can deposit your most precious treasures.” Eugene P. Bertin
  10. “Music is the universal language of mankind.” Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
  11. “The great majority of men are bundles of beginnings.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
  12. “You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm.” Colette
  13. “The dream begins with a teacher who believes in you, who tugs and pushes and leads you to the next plateau, sometimes poking you with a sharp stick called “truth.” Dan Rather
  14. “Children are 1/3rd of our population & all of our future.” Panel for the Promotion of Child Health
  15. “Mistakes are the usual bridge between inexperience and wisdom.” Phyllis Theroux
  16. “Good instincts usually tell you what to do long before your head has figured it out.” Michael Burke
  17. “There can never be enough said of virtues, dangers, the power of a shared laugh.” Francoise Sagan
  18. “Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go.” William Feather
  19. “You block your dream when you allow your fear to grow bigger than your faith.” Mary Manin Morrissey
  20. “I am learning all the time. The tombstone will be my diploma.” Ertha Kitt
  21. “Words can sometimes, in moments of grace of grace, attain the quality of deeds.” Eli Wiesel
  22. “The greatest dreams are always unrealistic.” Will Smith
  23. “He who dares to #teach must never cease to learn.” John Cotton Dana h
  24. “A child can ask questions a wise man cannot answer.” Author Unknown
  25. “The art of #teaching is the art of assisting discovery.” Mark Van Doren
  26. “The important thing is not so much that every child should be taught, as that every child should be given the wish to learn.“ John Lubbock
  27. “Every artist dips his brush in his own soul, and paints his nature into his pictures.” Henry Ward Beecher
  28. “What art offers is space – a certain breathing room for the spirit.” John Updike
  29. “You learn something every day if you pay attention.” Ray LeBlond
  30. “To #teach is to learn twice.” Joseph Joubert
  31. “There is a garden in every childhood, an enchanted place where colors are brighter, the air softer, and the morning more fragrant than ever.” Elizabeth Lawrence
  32. ‘If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange these apples then you and I will each have an apple. But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange these ideas, then each of us has two ideas.” George Bernard Shaw
  33. “Hip-hop is supposed to uplift and create, to educate people on a larger level to make change.” Doug E. Fresh
  34. “Man is harder than a rock and more fragile than an egg.” Yugoslavian Proverb
  35. “Teachers who inspire know that teaching is like cultivating a garden and those who would have nothing to do with thorns must never attempt to gather flowers.” Author Unknown
  36. “Teaching should be full of ideas instead of stuffed with facts.” Unknown
  37. “Maturity begins to grow when you can sense your concern for others outweighing your concern for yourself.” John McNaughton
  38. “All the world is a laboratory for the inquiring mind.” Martin H. Fischer
  39. “If you’re going to be thinking, you may as well think big.” Donald Trump
  40. “Vision is the art of seeing what is invisible to others.” Jonathan Swift
  41. “The giving of love is an #education in itself.” Eleanor Roosevelt
  42. “I am indebted to my father for living, but to my #teachers for living well.” Alexander the Great
  43. “#Teaching is not a lost art, but the regard for it is a lost tradition.” Jacques Barzun
  44. “He is rich or poor according to what he is, not according to what he has.” Henry Ward Beecher
  45. “The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own.” Benjamin Disraeli
  46. Teachers appreciate being appreciated, for teacher appreciation is their highest award. William Prince
  47. “Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe.” Gail Devers, 3-time Olympic Gold Medalist
  48. “A #teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops.” Henry Brooks Adams
  49. “We need to understand that every time an elementary teacher captures the imagination of a child through the arts or music of language this nation gets a little stronger.” Richard Riley, former Secretary of Education
  50. “Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn.” Irvin S. Cobb
  51. “The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable.” James A. Garfield
  52. “Every day may not be good, but there’s something good in everyday.” Author Unknown
  53. “A good teacher is like a candle – it consumes itself to light the the way for others.” Author Unknown
  54. “Children are a great comfort in your old age – and they help you reach it faster, too.” Lionel Kauffman
  55. “I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out my nose.” Woody Allen
  56. “Life is about using the whole box of crayons.” RuPaul
  57. “Every survival kit should include a sense of humor.” Author Unknown
  58. “Wisdom doesn’t necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up by itself.” Tom Wilson
  59. “Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay a while and leave footprints on our hearts. & we are never, ever the same.” Anonymous
  60. “To send a letter is a good way to go somewhere, without moving anything but your heart.” Phyllis Theroux
  61. “It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.” Albert Einstein
  62. “When someone you love becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure.” Author Unknown
  63. “The job of a #teacher is to teach students to see the vitality in themselves.” Joseph Campbell
  64. “We are all special cases.” Albert Camus
  65. “Personal relationships are the fertile soil from which all advancement, all success, all achievement, in real life grows.” Ben Stein
  66. “In all affairs it’s a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the the things you have long taken for granted.” Bertrand Russell
  67. “Optimism is the foundation of courage.” Nicholas Murray Butler
  68. “A teacher’s purpose is not to create students in his own image, but to develop students who can create their own image.” Author Unknown
  69. “One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of a child.” Carl Jung
  70. “May you live life every day of your life.” Jonathan Swift
  71. “Put your future in good hands, your own.” Author Unknown
  72. “The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires.” William Arthur Ward
  73. “A master can tell you what he expects of you. A #teacher…awakens your own expectations.” Patricia Neal
  74. “Out of this nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety.” William Shakespeare
  75. “Good teachers are costly, but bad teachers cost more.” Bob Talbert
  76. “We expect teachers to handle teen pregnancy, abuse, and failings of the family. Then we expect them to educate our children.” John Sculley
  77. “If a doctor, lawyer, or dentist had 40 people in his office at one time, all of whom had different needs, and some whom didn’t want to be there and were causing trouble, and the doctor, lawyer, or dentist, without assistance, had to treat them all with professional excellence for nine months, the he might have some conception of the classroom teacher’s job.” Donald D. Quinn
  78. “Teachers are expected to reach unattainable goals with inadequate tools. The miracle is that at times they accomplish this task.” Haim Ginott
  79. “He who opens a school door, closes a prison.” Victor Hugo
  80. “#Teaching is the greatest act of optimism.” Colleen Wilcox
  81. “Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.” Paul Boese
  82. “To often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring. all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” Leo Buscaglia
  83. “A #teacher is one who makes himself progressively unnecessary.” Thomas Carruthers
  84. “A #teacher is a compass that activates the magnets of curiosity, knowledge, and wisdom in the pupils.” Ever Garrison
  85. “Many things grow in a garden that were never sown.” Thomas Fuller
  86. “#Teacher appreciation makes the world of education go around.” Helen Peters
  87. “Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.” John Lennon
  88. “Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or self-confidence.” Robert Frost
  89. “The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings.” Eric Hoffer
  90. “When people go to work, they shouldn’t have to leave their hearts at home.” Betty Bender
  91. “Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds you plant.” Robert Louis Stevenson
  92. “If you want to turn your life around, try thankfulness. It will change your life mightily.” Gerald Good
  93. “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”  Plato
  94. “And in today already walks tomorrow.” Samuel Taylor Coleridge
  95. “Someday is not a day of the week.” Author Unknown
  96. “Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” William James.” Samuel Taylor Coleridge
  97. “I can live two months on a good compliment.” Mark Twain
  98. “In teaching you cannot see the fruit of a days work. It is invisible and remains so, maybe for 20 years.” Jacques Barzun
  99. “Mighty things from small beginnings grown.” John Dryden
  100. “Travel and change of place impart new vigor to the mind.” Seneca
  101. “The direction in which education starts a man will determine his future life.” Plato