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  1. Why did the NFL football player go to the bank?… to get his quarter back.
  2. What’s the difference between a quarterback and a baby?… One takes the snap, the other takes a nap.
  3. What football play should you be suspicious of?… The quarterback sneak.
  4. How is losing money in a payphone like a football game?… If you don’t get the quarter back, you hit the receiver!
  5. What did the football say to the punter?… “I get a kick out of you.”
  6. If you want to sack the Dolphins quarterback, what should you use?… Your fishing tackle. (Top Fishing Jokes)
  7. Why do coaches like punters?… Because punters always put their best foot forward.
  8. Why did the poor quarterback have his receivers cross at midfield?… Because he was trying to make ends meet.
  9. What do you call a lineman’s kids?… Chips off the old blocker.
  10. Did you here about the football player who asked his coach to flood the field so he could go in as a sub?
  11. Where do hungry football players play?… In the Supper Bowl.
  12. Did you hear that some NFL football teams don’t have a website?…They can’t string three “Ws” together.
  13. What’s the difference between the poor, inconsistent football team and a dollar bill?… You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
  14. What does a bad football team and possums have in common?… Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!
  15. What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?… “Give me my quarterback!”
  16. What kind of ends do you find in libraries?… Book ends.
  17. Which player is the easiest target to hit with the football?… The wide receiver.
  18. Who are the happiest people at the football game?… The cheerleaders.
  19. Where do quarterbacks go when they get old?… Out to pass-ture.
  20. Why can’t the struggling quarterback get into his own driveway?… Someone painted an endzone on it.
  21. Which football team cooks gourmet meals together?… The Kansas City Chefs.
  22. What do you call 53 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?… ALL the NFL teams not in the Super Bowl.
  23. Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player?… Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.
  24. Why did the elephant who was a football fan start a stampede?… Because he wanted to play for the Chargers.
  25. Why are football stadiums always cool?… “Because they’re full of fans.”

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