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Author Bio: Phillip Taylor

The article talks about the interaction between the school and the family in the upbringing of the child and its importance for the development of healthy relationships.

Importance of the family

We all gain a certain experience of communication in the parents’ house, then in our own family, as well as in communication with friends and colleagues. Often or rarely we feel that communication is not as smooth as we would have wanted it to be. It is important to understand the true origin of why it happens.

How can a child and an adult together make an analysis of the causes of the emergence of such situations as conflict, dissipation, irritability, intransigence, etc.?

Each family is a unique combination of people and circumstances. It’s good if the family has a psychological style of thinking, understanding of each other, and the ability to understand specific situations.

Understanding of the analysis of everyday situations is hindered by entrenched prejudices in the family. We often explain our own failures in dealing with the closed ones with their irritability, intolerance, touchiness, and callousness, that is, explain the difficulties of communication with the shortcomings of another. Similarly, we cover up our own mistakes in upbringing, communication with the child by attributing to the child such negative features as laziness, absent-mindedness, distractibility, stubbornness, selfishness, etc.

Family communication often depends on such phenomena of everyday life as egocentric emotions of envy, jealousy, resentment, and gloating. After all, the uncontrollability of these emotions is the main case of our non-self-sufficiency. Experiencing these emotions, we concentrate our attention on the shortcomings of others and are actually blind to our own shortcomings. It is these emotions that are the cause of misunderstanding of each other, we ourselves bring life actions to the family that provoke others to inadequate behavior.

We forget that everyday long-term communication of close people is a special communication. Communication, which determines the formation of certain traits in people.

The family at all times plays a crucial role in strengthening the health and upbringing of the younger generation. The family forms the basis of a person’s character, attitude to work, learning, the most important moral, as well as ideological and cultural values.

It is very important to increase the responsibility of parents for the upbringing of children. Without the help of parents, deep personal interest, without having the pedagogical and psychological knowledge, the process of education and training will not yield the desired result. Consequently, the role of the teacher in educating parents, establishing their contact with the school is now particularly huge.

Do not punish children twice

A bad grade is a sufficient punishment, and you should not punish twice for the same mistakes. The child has already received a grade for his knowledge, and he is waiting for help from his parents at home, rather than lectures.

No more than one shortcoming per minute

To save the child from the shortcomings, notice no more than one per minute. Know the measure. Otherwise, your child will simply stop reacting and become insensitive to your remarks. Of course, this is very difficult, but if possible, choose from among the many shortcomings of the child the one that is especially intolerable to you, which you want to liquidate in the first place, and talk only about it. The rest will be overcome later or simply will not be significant.

Consult with the child and start eliminating those learning difficulties that are most significant for him. Here you will soon find understanding and unanimity. If you are worried, first of all, about the speed of reading, do not ask the child for both expressiveness and retelling at the same time.

Praise the performer, criticize the performance

The score must have the exact address. The child usually believes his entire personality is evaluated. In your power to help him separate the evaluation of his personality from the evaluation of his work. Praise the person. A positive evaluation should apply to a person who has become a bit more knowledgeable and skillful. If thanks to your praise, the child begins to respect himself for these qualities, then you lay one more important reason for wanting to learn. But the criticism should be more impersonal. This form of negative evaluations stimulates correction of mistakes but does not adversely affect the child’s attitude to knowledge and his belief in success.

Compare today’s successes of the child with his own yesterday’s setbacks

Do not compare the child’s achievements with state standards of assessment or with the successes of his neighbor. After all, even the smallest success of a child is a real success, a victory over oneself, and it should be seen and evaluated on merit.

Do not skimp on praise. There is no such person who cannot be praised for anything. Select some good things from the shortcomings and the child will have support.

Set extremely specific and realistic goals for the child

Then the child will try to reach them. Do not tempt a child with unrealistic goals, do not push him into the path of deliberate lies. If he made nine mistakes in the dictation, do not take from him the promise to do better next time. Agree that there will be no more than seven and rejoice with the child if this is achieved.

The grade should be expressed in any visible signs

It is very important that the grade is expressed not only in words, but it is materialized in some visible signs. To do this, use charts, tables, etc., which will help visually compare yesterday’s and today’s achievements of the child. Learn more about the grades on the admission-essay service.

What do you need to teach the child?

Love yourself. Self-love is the most fundamental and essential of all abilities. As long as the child does not value his own life, he will not become active, which means he will not be able to realize himself.

Interpret the behavior of people. The child finds himself in various situations in life, in which he can simply become embarrassed. If the child has learned to understand and explain the behavior of people, he will not be inclined to be upset in such situations.

Explain his own behavior. The child will be able to explain how he behaved in the lesson, whether it is good or bad, why it happened to him and what he feels at the same time. Then he can better understand what they want from him, what he is doing wrong, and why it happens to him.

Communicate with words. A child who can explain what is happening to him in words helps others understand him better and thereby removes many problems and troubles.