- Baby snake: Mommy, are we poisonous? Mother snake: Yes, son.Why? Baby snake: I just bit my tongue!
- Son: Dad, do you know the difference between a pack of cookies and a pack of elephants? Dad: No. Son: Then it’s a good thing Mom does the grocery shopping!
- What did the mother rope say to her child?…“Don’t be knotty.”
- What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?… It’s time to go to sweep!
- Larry’s mother had four children. Three were named North, South and West. What was her other child’s name? … Larry.
- What did the digital clock say to its mother?… “Look, Ma! No hands!”
- A police recruit was asked during the exam, ‘What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?’ He answered, ‘Call for backup.’
- Mother to daughter advice: Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day.
But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.