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As Christmas approaches, we wanted to share a few more seasonal jokes with you. We hope you enjoy.
- Why did the gingerbread man go to the doctors?…He was feeling crummy.
- What is the difference between the alphabet and the Christmas alphabet?…The Christmas alphabet has no L (noel)
- What did the gingerbread man put on his bed?…A cookie sheet!
- Where do Santa Claus and the elves keep their money?… In a snow bank.
- If an athlete gets athlete’s foot, what does an astronaut get?…Missile Toe
- What do you call a person who is afraid of Santa Claus?…Claustrophobic.
- Elves use what kind of money?…Jingle bills!
- What would you call an elf who just has won the lottery?…Welfy
- Where would a reindeer go to find her lost tail?…”Re-tail” store.
- Which reindeer has the cleanest antlers?…Comet!
- How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming?…He looks at his calen-”deer”!
- Which elf was the best singer?…ELFis Presley.
- How do snowmen travel around?…By icicle!
- How does one snowman greet another snowman?….Ice to meet you.
- What is the favorite Mexican food of snowman?… Brrrr- itos.
- What kind of money snowmen use in the North Pole?…Cold cash!
- What did the big angel say to the little angel on Christmas Eve?…Halo there!
- If Santa Claus is crossed with a detective then you would get what?…Santa Clues!
- What is the snowman’s breakfast?…Frosted flakes!
- Where the snowman does dances on?…A snow ball!
- What snowmen wear on the Christmas Eve?…Ice caps.
- When Santa doesn’t move then what he should be called?…Santa Pause.
- How do sheep in Mexico greet Merry Christmas?…Fleece Navidad!
- What kind of music does elves like best?…”Wrap” music!
- How do sheep greet each other at Christmas?… A merry Christmas to ewe.
- How do elves greet each other?… “Small world, isn’t it?”
- What do elves learn in schools?… the “elf”-abet!
- What nationality is Santa?… North Polish!
- What did the ghost say to Santa?… We’ll have a boo Christmas without you!
- What do you call a cat at the beach during Christmastime?… Sandy Claws!
- What do snowmen eat for breakfast?… Snowflakes!
- Why does Santa have 3 gardens?… So he can ho-ho-ho!
- Why was Santa’s little helper sad?… He had low elf esteem!
- What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?… It’s Christmas, Eve!
- What do you have in December that you don’t have in any other month?… The letter “D”!
- What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve?… Black mail!
- Who delivers cat’s Christmas presents?… Santa Paws!
- Why does Father Christmas go down the chimney?… Because it soots him!
- What do snowmen like to do on the weekend?…Chill out.
- What does Jack Frost like best about school?…Snow and tell.
- Knock, knock…Who’s there?…Olive…Olive, who?…Olive the other reindeer.
- A Christmas book never written: “What Did I Do Wrong THIS Year?” by Kole N. Stocking.
- What did one snowman say to the other snowman?…Do you smell carrots?
- Knock Knock…Who’s there?…Mary… Mary who?… Mary Christmas!
- Why did Santa spell Christmas N-O-E?… Because the angel had said, “No L!”
- Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?… You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
- What do reindeer say before telling a joke?… This one will sleigh you!
- Why is a reindeer like a gossip?… Because they are both tail bearers!
- How do you make a slow reindeer fast?… Don’t feed it!
- Where do you find reindeer?… It depends on where you leave them!
- What happened when the snowgirl had a fight with the snowboy?… She gave him the cold shoulder!
- What’s an ig?…An eskimo’s home without a loo!
- What sort of ball doesn’t bounce?… A snowball!
- How do you call an Eskimo cow?… An Eskimoo!
- What is the best Christmas present in the world?….A broken drum, you can’t beat it!
- Which of Santa’s reindeer has bad manners?… Rude-olph!
- Why are Christmas trees such bad knitters?… They are always dropping their needles.
- Why do mummies like Christmas so much?… Because of all the wrapping!
- What goes in a chimney red and comes out of it black?… Santa Claus.
- What do they sing under the ocean during the winter?… Christmas Corals!
- How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?… Nothing, it was on the house!
- What Christmas carol is a favorite of parents?… Silent Night.
- What do you call a snowman in the summer?… A puddle!
- What did the snowman order at the fast food restaurant?… An ice burger with chili sauce.
- Why is Santa so good at karate?… Because he has a black belt!
- What kind of bug hates Christmas?… A humbug.
- What two countries should the chef use when he’s making Christmas dinner?… Turkey and Greece.
- Who gives presents to baby sharks?… Santa Jaws.
- What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa when she looked in the sky?… “Looks like rain, dear.”
- What did the Christmas tree say to the ornament?… “Aren’t you tired of hanging around?”
- What did the monkey sing on Christmas day?… Jungle bells, Jungle bells…
- What do you call Santa when he goes down a chimney with a fire at the bottom?… Krisp Cringle.
- Did you hear about the fire cracker’s Christmas party?… It was a BANG!
- What do you get if you cross an apple and a Christmas tree?… Pineapple.
- What is the cleanest reindeer called?… Comet.
- How do you know when Santa’s in the room?… You can sense his presents.
- What comes before Christmas Eve?… Christmas Adam!
- Why did Jimmy’s grades drop after the holidays?… Because everything was marked down!
- Knock knock…Who’s there?… Irish... Irish who? … Irish you a Merry Christmas!
- Knock knock... Who’s there? … Mary and Abbey... Mary and Abbey who? … Mary Christmas and Abbey New Year!
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