Top 50 Octopus Jokes

by | Oct 6, 2022 | Dads, Latest News, Moms, Parents, School Jokes

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More Octopus Jokes… 

  1. Knock knockout?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We have the best Octopus jokes.
  2. What do you get when you cross a farm laborer with an octopus?… The best darn apple picker you’ve ever seen.
  3. Octopus: [holding a gun in each hand] Cat: You’re one short pal. (Cat Jokes)
  4. What’s an octopus’ favorite party?… Oktoperfest. (Octopus Jokes & October Jokes)
  5. What do you call 2 octopuses that look exactly the same?… Itenticle. (Twin Jokes)
  6. Why does an octopus perform poorly on a basketball court?… It’s always getting tentacle fouls. (World’s Best Basketball Jokes)
  7. What do humans and octopuses have in common?… Two sets of forearms. (Biology Jokes for Teachers)
  8. What is an octopus’s favorite game?… Squidditch. (Harry Potter Jokes)
  9. How do young fish get to school?… By octobus. (180 School Jokes)
  10. What did the octopus say to his girlfriend at the Beatles concert?… I wanna hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand… (Music Jokes & 365 Music Jokes)
  11. Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?… Because the octopus was well armed. (Shark Jokes & Boxing Jokes)
  12. I went into a restaurant and I ordered octopus.The waiter said: “It takes four hours.”I asked why? He said: “It keeps turning off the gas!”
  13. Who held the baby octopus for a ransom?…  Squidnappers. (Police Jokes)
  14. What do you call 8 x 3.14?… Octopi. (Pi Day Jokes)
  15. Did you hear about the guy who got a tattoo of an octopus?… He got inked up.
  16. What is the octopuses favorite shape?… An octagon. (Geometry Jokes for Teachers)
  17. What would be good about crossing a turkey with an octopus?… Everyone would get a drumstick on Thanksgiving. (Thanksgiving Jokes)
  18. An octopus politician offered to pay my debts if I voted for him…. I guess it’s squid pro quo. (Election Jokes)
  19. What do sharks eat for dessert?… Octo-pie. (Shark Jokes & Pie Jokes)
  20. Who was the most infamous pirate octopus?… Captain Squid. (Pirate Jokes)
  21. What sort of fish operates on sick octopuses?… A sturgeon.
  22. An octopus went off to war… It’s a good thing that he was well-armed. (Memorial Day Jokes & Veterans Day Jokes)
  23. What did the Giant Octopus under the Tacoma Narrows Bridge eat for lunch?… Fish and ships. (Octopus Jokes & Fishing Jokes)
  24. What did the squid sheriff put together to find the outlaw cowboy?… An octoposse. 
  25. What is an octopus’s favorite band?… Ink Floyd! (365 Music Jokes)
  26. What do octopus knights wear?… A coat of arms. (Knight Jokes & Biology Jokes)
  27. People sometimes confuse the plural of octopus, it’s one octopus, two octopuses, 3.14 octopi. (Pi Jokes)
  28. What’s an octopus’s favorite number?… 3.14, octo-pi!
  29. Where does an octopus sleep?… On the seabed!
  30. What sea creatures say hello sixteen times?… Two octopuses shaking hands. 
  31. How do you know if an octopus is alive?… You check its octo-pulse! (Doctor Jokes)
  32. What do you call a relaxed octopus?… A calm-ari! (Psychology Jokes)
  33. What do you call an octopus musician?… A rocktopus. (Music Jokes)
  34. A recruiter asks an octopus if he wants to join the Army… The octopus says no thanks I’m army enough as it is. (Memorial Day Jokes & Veterans Day Jokes)
  35. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?… Ten tickles.
  36. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Noah… Noah, who?… Noah good joke about an Octopus? (Summer Olympic Knock Knock Jokes)
  37. How does a nurse know if an octopus is alive?… You check its octo-pulse!
  38. I saw an octopus dancing at the marine disco… It pulled a mussel.
  39. Why does an octopus make a great drill sergeant?… Because it’s arm-y!
  40. Where do female sea creatures keep their money?… In their octopurse.
  41. I asked how much the creature that looked like an ill octopus cost and what it was… The chap said “Sick squid.”
  42. What do you call a group of squid?… A squad!
  43. Why do octopuses love camping?…They sleep in tent-icles!
  44. I heard on the news that the police were looking for a runaway octopus… They said he was armed and dangerous.
  45. How do we know that octopuses can’t commit crimes?… They don’t have a bad bone in their bodies. (octopus have no bones) 
  46. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… June… June who?… June know how to tell a good Octopus knock-knock joke?
  47. She: Why is your shirt smudged with ink blots? He: I refilled a printer cartridge at work today. Octopus under their bed: whispers Tell her about us, you chicken.
  48. How do we know that octopuses can’t commit crimes?… They don’t have a bad bone in their bodies. (octopus have no bones) 
  49. An octopus held up the local bank… Apparently he was well armed.
  50. How did the octopuses win the football game?.. Ten tackles. (College Football Jokes)