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- Top Twitter Accounts
- December Jokes
- Christmas Jokes for Kids
- Christmas Trivia & Answers
- Top Christmas Twitter Accounts
- Why are reindeer always so happy the night of Christmas Eve?… Because they’re on top of the world! (Reindeer Jokes)
- Why is it so easy to track Santa on Christmas Eve?… Because he always accepts cookies. (Cookie Jokes & Computer Jokes)
- What vaccination does Santa Claus get on Christmas Eve?… Shingles. (Doctor Jokes)
- What did the big angel say to the little angel on Christmas Eve?…Halo there! (Christmas Eve Jokes)
- How does Santa get his Reindeer to fly?… He uses Red Bull because it gives you wings! (Reindeer Jokes)
- Who does Santa call when his sleigh breaks down?… The Abominable Towman. (Car Jokes & Snowman Jokes)
- Where does Santa and his reindeer go to get hot chocolate while flying in the sky?… Star-bucks. (Coffee Jokes & Reindeer Jokes)
- What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?… Horn-Aments. (Christmas Tree Jokes)
- Why did Santa go to a psychiatrist?… He no longer believed in himself. (Psychology Jokes & Santa Jokes)
- Why does Scrooge love all of the reindeer?… Because every buck is dear to him! (Reindeer Jokes)
- What comes before Christmas Eve?… Christmas Adam. (Christmas Eve Jokes)
- What is Clarence’s (It’s a Wonderful Life) favorite baseball team?… The Angels! (Baseball Jokes)
- Who does Santa call when his sleigh breaks down?… The Abominable Towman. (Car Jokes & Snowman Jokes)
- What did the big angel say to the little angel on Christmas Eve?…Halo there! (Christmas Eve Jokes)
- Did you hear about the fire cracker’s Christmas Eve party?… It was a BANG! (Fireworks Jokes)
- How does Christmas Eve end?… With the letter ‘E’!
- What does Tarzan sing on Christmas Eve?… Jungle bells, jungle bells … (Tarzan Jokes for Kids & Music Jokes)
- Why didn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas Eve party?… He had no-body to go with. (Skeleton Jokes)
- What do you call a cat on Christmas Eve?… Sandy Claws. (Christmas Eve Jokes & Cat Jokes)
- Why does Santa have 3 gardens?… So he can ho-ho-ho!What is the best Christmas present in the world?… A broken drum, you can’t beat it! (Music Jokes)
- Why did Rudolph get a bad report card?… Because he went down in history. (Reindeer Jokes& 180 School Jokes)
- How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?… Nothing, it was on the house!
- What kind of music does elves like best?…”Wrap” music! (Music Jokes & Elf Jokes)
- Who is a Christmas tree’s favorite singer?… Spruce Springsteen. (Christmas Tree Jokes & Music Jokes)
- Darth Vader: I know what you’re getting for Christmas. Luke: How do you know? Darth Vader: I can feel your presents. (Star Wars Jokes)
- What nationality is Santa?… North Polish! (World Geography Jokes)
- What do call a middle school student afraid of Santa Claus?….Claustrophobic. (Middle School Jokes)
- Knock knock…Who’s there?… Irish... Irish who?… Irish you a Merry Christmas! (Christmas Knock Knock Jokes & St. Patrick’s Day Jokes)
- What do reindeer say before telling a joke?… This one will sleigh you! (Reindeer Jokes)Why was Santa’s little helper sad?… He had low elf esteem! (Psychology Jokes / High School Psychology Lessons / Elf Jokes)What’s Santa’s dog’s name?… Santa Paws! (Dog Jokes)How is the alphabet different on Christmas from every other day?… There’s Noel! (Teacher Jokes & Top 10 Christmas Jokes for Teachers)Did you hear about the fire cracker’s Christmas party?… It was a BANG! (Fireworks Jokes)A book never written: “Joyful Occasions” by Holly Daze.What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa when she looked in the sky?… “Looks like rain, dear.” (Reindeer Jokes)Which of Santa’s reindeer has bad manners?… Rude-olph!(Reindeer Jokes)What would you call an elf who just has won the lottery?…Welfy. (Elf Jokes)What do elves learn in schools?… the “elf”-abet! (Back to School Jokes& Elf Jokes)What comes before Christmas Eve?… Christmas Adam. (Christmas Eve Jokes)If an athlete gets athlete’s foot, what does an astronaut get?…Missile Toe. (Top 10 Sports Jokes)Why is Santa so good at karate?… Because he has a black belt! (Top 10 Karate Jokes)Which famous person do you get when you make a wreath out of $100 bills?… Aretha Franklin. (Music Jokes)Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Murray… Murray who?… Murray Christmas, one and all! (Christmas Knock Knock Jokes)How do you know when Santa’s in the room?… You can sense his presents.What do you call an outlaw who steals gift wrapping from the rich to give to the poor?… Ribbon Hood.Elves use what kind of money?… Jingle bills! (Elf Jokes)How do elves greet each other?… “Small world, isn’t it?” (Elf Jokes) & Disney Jokes)How is the American flag like Santa Claus?… They both hang out at the pole! (American Revolution Jokes& Flag Day Jokes)What do you call a shark that delivers toys at Christmas?… “Santa Jaws!” (Shark Jokes)What’s the difference between Santa’s reindeer and a knight?… One slays the dragon, and the other’s draggin’ the sleigh. (Reindeer Jokes&Knight Jokes)What are you giving Mom and Dad for Christmas?… A list of everything I want! (Mother’s Day Jokes & Father’s Day Jokes)What does Tarzan sing at Christmas?… Jungle bells, jungle bells … (Tarzan Jokes for Kids & Music Jokes)Did you know Santa had only eight reindeer last Christmas?… Comet stayed home to clean the sink. (Reindeer Jokes)What do you get if you cross an iPad with a Christmas tree?… A pineapple! (Christmas Tree Jokes) A book never written: “What Did I Do Wrong THIS Year?” by Kole N. Stocking.A book never written: “How to Decorate a Tree” by Orna Ment. (Christmas Tree Jokes) What do fish sing during winter?… Christmas corals. (Music Jokes & Ocean Jokes)How did the ornament get addicted to Christmas?… He was hooked on trees his whole life. (Christmas Tree Jokes)Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Olive… Olive, who?… Olive the other reindeer. (Christmas Knock Knock Jokes & Reindeer Jokes)What is a Christmas tree’s favorite candy?… Ornamints. (Candy Jokes & Christmas Tree Jokes)Does Santa Claus refer to his elves as ‘subordinate clauses’? (Elf Jokes)What do you get when you eat Christmas ornaments?… Tinsel-itis! (Doctor Jokes& Christmas Tree Jokes)What two countries should the chef use when he’s making Christmas dinner?… Turkey and Greece. (World Geography Jokes)Why did the gingerbread man go to the doctors?…He was feeling crummy. (Cookie Jokes)Where would a reindeer go to find her lost tail?…”Re-tail” store. (Reindeer Jokes)What did the gingerbread man put on his bed?… A cookie sheet! (Cookie Jokes& Napping Jokes)What’s St. Nicholas’s favorite measurement in the metric system?… The Santameter! (Math Jokes for Kids)Where do Christmas plants go when they want to become movie stars?… Holly-wood! (California Jokes)What did the peanut butter say to the grape on Christmas?… “‘Tis the season to be jelly!” (Peanut Butter Jokes)What do sheep say to shepherds at Christmastime?… “Season’s bleatings!” (Sheep Jokes)What’s Santa Claus’s favorite type of potato chip?… Crisp Pringles!What’s Santa Claus’s favorite track & field event?… North Pole-vaulting! (Track & Field Jokes)Why did Scrooge keep a pet lamb?… Because it would say, “Baaaaahh humbug!” (Lamb Jokes)Where do you find reindeer?… It depends on where you leave them! (Reindeer Jokes)What’s Santa’s favorite snack food?… Crisp Pringles.What Do You Sing At An Elf’s Birthday Party?… Freeze A Jolly Good Fellow! (Elf Jokes / Music Jokes / Birthday Jokes)What cars do elves drive?… A toy Yoda. (Star Wars Jokes & Car Jokes)How did Scrooge win the football game?… The ghost of Christmas passed. (Football Jokes)What do you call Santa’s helpers?… Subordinate Clauses.What is Santa’s primary language?… North Polish. (World Geography Jokes)Why did they couple get hitched on the 24 of December?… So they could have a married Christmas. (Valentine’s Day Jokes)What is Santa Claus’ laundry detergent of choice?… Yule-Tide. How does Santa keep his bathroom tiles immaculate?… He uses Comet.What’s Santa’s favorite song by the Ramones?… Blitzen-krieg Bop. (Music Jokes)Why does St. Nick like the Temptations’ version of Silent Night best?… Because Santa Was A Rolling Stone. (Music Jokes)What do the elves call it when Father Christmas claps his hands at the end of a play?… Santapplause!What has four legs, a shiny nose, and fought for England?… Rudolph the Redcoat Reindeer! (Reindeer Jokes& American Revolution Jokes)What did the generous mole say when his friends crashed his Christmas party?… The mole the merrier! (Mole Day Jokes & Christmas Trivia)What did the reindeer say to the football player?… “Your Blitzen days are over!” (Reindeer Jokes& Football Jokes)How does a sheep say “Merry Christmas”?… “Fleece Navidad!” (Music Jokes & Sheep Jokes)Why does Santa go down the chimney?… Because it soots him!Why do Dasher and Dancer love coffee?… Because they’re Santa’s star bucks! (Reindeer Jokes &Coffee Jokes)What did the pepper say on its holiday card?… “Season’s greetings.”What does Santa say at the start of a race?… Ready, set, Ho! Ho! Ho! (Track & Field Jokes)What do you call a cat on Christmas Eve?… Sandy Claws. (Christmas Eve Jokes & Cat Jokes)Knock knock…Who’s there?… Hannah…. Hannah who?… Hannah partridge in a pear tree! (Christmas Knock Knock Jokes & Music Jokes)Knock, knock!… Who’s there?… Dexter… Dexter, who?… Dexter halls with boughs of holly. (Christmas Knock Knock Jokes)What type of cars do elves drive?… Toy-otas. (Car Jokes & Elf Jokes)Which holiday mascot has the least spare change?… St. Nickel-lessHow can you tell a family doesn’t celebrate Christmas?… The lights are on, but nobody’s a gnome.What do you call an obnoxious reindeer?… RUDEolph. (Reindeer Jokes)What do you call an elf who sings?… A wrapper! (Elf Jokes & Music Jokes)What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?… A rebel without a Claus.What do you call a bankrupt Santa?… Saint Nickel-less.Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?… It needed to be trimmed. (Barber Jokes & Christmas Tree Jokes)What do you say to Santa when he’s taking attendance at school?… Present. (Christmas Jokes for Teachers)What do you call Kris Kringle when he goes on his wife’s health insurance?… A dependent Claus.Why did Santa bring 22 reindeer to Walmart?… Because what he wanted to buy cost around 20 bucks, but just in case it was more, he brought some extra doe. (Reindeer Jokes)What kind of bike does Santa Claus ride?… A Holly Davidson.What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective?… Santa Clues! (Police Jokes)When Santa is on the beach what do the elves call him?… Sandy Claus. (Summer Jokes & Elf Jokes)Where do Santa Claus and the elves keep their money?… In a snow bank. (Winter Jokes& Elf Jokes)How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming?…He looks at his calen-”deer”! (Reindeer Jokes)Which elf was the best singer?… ELFis Presley. (Elf Jokes)Why the turkey was asked to join the band by elves?… because he had the drum sticks! (Elf Jokes & Turkey Jokes)What did the ghost say to Santa?… We’ll have a boo Christmas without you! (Ghost Jokes)What is a ghost’s favorite Christmas Song?… I’ll have a boo Christmas without you! (Ghost Jokes & Music Jokes)What did the big angel say to the little angel on Christmas Eve?…Halo there! (Christmas Eve Jokes)What do you call Santa when he goes down a chimney with a fire at the bottom?… Krisp Cringle.What did the Christmas tree say to the ornament?… “Aren’t you tired of hanging around?” (Christmas Tree Jokes)What do you call a greedy elf?… Elfish. (Elf Jokes)Why are Christmas trees so fond of the past?… Because the present’s beneath them. (Christmas Tree Jokes) What do road crews use at the North Pole?… Snow cones! (Snow Jokes)What is the cleanest reindeer called?… Comet. (Reindeer Jokes)What does a grumpy sheep say at Christmas?… “Baaaa humbug!” (Sheep Jokes)What has a jolly laugh, brings you presents and scratches up your furniture?… Santa Claws.How can Santa deliver presents during a thunderstorm?… His sleigh is flown by raindeer. (Reindeer Jokes)Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Pizza…. Pizza, who?… Pizza on earth, good will toward men! (Pizza Jokes & Christmas Knock Knock Jokes)What is a bird’s favorite Christmas story?… The Finch Who Stole Christmas. (Bird Jokes)Friend: What are you going to give your little brother for Christmas this year? Other Friend: I haven’t decided yet. Friend: What did you give him last year? Other Friend: The measles. (Doctor Jokes)When Santa doesn’t move then what he should be called?… Santa Pause.What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?… Ribbon Hood. (Archery Jokes)One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, “It’s going to rain.”His wife asked, “How do you know?”“Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.” (Reindeer Jokes & Viking Jokes)What’s white, red and blue at Christmas time?… A sad candy cane! (Psychology Jokes)What do you call a snowman at a July Summer Camp?… A puddle. (Summer Camp Jokes for Kids / July Jokes / Snowman Jokes)What’s a good time for Santa to come down the chimney?… Anytime! (Daylight Saving Jokes)What does Christmas have to do with a cat lost in the desert?… They both have sandy claws. (Cat Jokes) Where do snowmen keep their money?… In a snow bank. (Snowman Jokes)What do elves do after school?… Their gnome work! (Elf jokes & 180 School Jokes)Teacher: Define claustrophobia. Student: Fear of Santa Claus? (Psychology Jokes & Teacher Jokes)What do snowmen like to do on the weekend?… Chill out. (Snowman Jokes)What does Jack Frost like best about school?… Snow and tell. (Winter Jokes & 180 School Jokes)Where do polar bears vote?… The North Poll! (World Geography Jokes & Election Jokes)What do you call a snowman with a six pack?… An abdominal snowman. (Snowman Jokes)What Christmas carol is a favorite of parents?… Silent Night. (Music Jokes)Why did the candy cane cross the road?… Because it wanted to get a licking! (Candy Jokes)What do cows say at Christmas?… MOOey Christmas! (Cow Jokes)Why are Christmas trees such bad knitters?… They are always dropping their needles. (Christmas Tree Jokes)Why do mummies like Christmas so much?… Because of all the wrapping! (Mummy Jokes)What goes in a chimney red and comes out of it black?… Santa Claus.What is invisible and smells like milk and cookies?… Santa’s burps! (Cookie Jokes)What do you get if you cross Santa Claus with a duck?… A Christmas Quacker! (Duck Jokes)Why is a reindeer like a gossip?… Because they are both tail bearers! (Reindeer Jokes)Why do reindeer wear fur coats ?… Because they would look silly in plastic macs! (Reindeer Jokes)Where do you find reindeer?… It depends on where you leave them! (Reindeer Jokes)Knock Knock…Who’s there?…Avery…Avery who?…Avery merry Christmas! (Christmas Knock Knock Jokes)Why did Santa spell Christmas N-O-E?… Because the angel had said, “No L!”Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?… You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.What do you call a cat on a summer camp field trip to the beach?…. Sandy claws. (Summer Camp Jokes for Kids / Christmas Jokes / Cat Jokes)What happens to elves when they behave naughty?… Santa gives them the sack. (Elf Jokes)Why didn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas party?… He had no-body to go with. (Skeleton Jokes)Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?… A Mince Spy! (Pie Jokes)What says ‘Oh Oh Oh’?… Santa walking backwards! (Walking Jokes)What do zombies eat with their Christmas dinner?… Grave-y. (Cemetery Jokes)What happened to the thief who stole a Christmas Advent Calendar?… He got 25 days! (Police Jokes)Why did Santa go to the doctor?… Because of his bad “elf”! (Doctor Jokes & Elf Jokes)What is a skunks favorite Christmas song?… Jingle smells! (Music Jokes)