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Jokes for ALL Months

  1. What month should you never ask to the Prom?… “NO” vember (Clean Prom Jokes)
  2. What month should you never ask to borrow money from?… “NO” vember

November 2nd: National Sandwich Day:

  1. What did the ghost eat for lunch?… A booloney sandwich! (Top Halloween Jokes)
  2. What does a clock do when it’s hungry?… It goes back for seconds! (Top Day Light Savings Jokes)
  3. If people like sandwiches, what do lions like?… Man-wiches.
  4. A ham sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food here.”

November 4th: National Candy Day:

  1. What kind of bear has no teeth?… A gummy bear!
  2. What did the M&M go to college? Because he wanted to be a Smarty. (Top College Jokes)
  3. What did the cute Starburst say to the Mars Bar?… Going my Milky Way? (Top Astronomy Jokes)
  4. What country did candy come from?… Sweeten! (World Geography Jokes)
  5. What do you call a lamb covered in chocolate?…. A Candy Baa
  6. What do you call a dog standing on a Mars bar?… Rover! (Top Astronomy JokesTop Dog Jokes)
  7. Knock Knock!… Who’s there?… Candy!… Candy who?… Candy cow jump over the moon? (Full Moon Jokes)
  8. Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?… Because it lost its filling!
  9. How many grams of protein are there in that slice of chocolate pie?… 3.14159265. (101 Pi Day Jokes)
  10. What do you call an infant that cries alot?… Baby Ruthless (Top Baseball Jokes)

November 5th: Daylight Saving Time:

  1. “I don’t mind going back to daylight saving time. With inflation, the hour will be the only thing I’ve saved all year.” Victor Borge
  2. What does a clock do when it’s hungry?… It goes back for seconds! (Top Sandwich Day Jokes)
  3. Why didn’t the clock work?… It needed a hand.
  4. At what time does a duck wake up?… At the quack of dawn.
  5. How do you know if your clock is crazy?… It goes “cuckoo”! (Top Psychology Jokes)
  6. Why did the girl throw the clock out the window?… Because she wanted to see time fly.
  7. If a basketball team were chasing a baseball team, what time would it be?… Five after nine. (9:05) (Top March Madness JokesTop Baseball JokesTop Basketball Jokes)
  8. When does a clock strike thirteen?… When it’s broken!
  9. What time is it when 10 elephants are chasing you?…Ten to one!
  10. What time is it when you find an elephant in your car?… Time to get a new car!

November 8th: Election Day: Presidential Election Jokes (Electoral College: Highest to Lowest / Top Social Studies Jokes / Top 500 U.S. Jokes):

  1. What is the most popular college during election season?… The Electoral College.
  2. What might an older candidate need if elected?… Presidentures! (Top President’s Day Jokes!)
  3. How did George Washington speak to during his 1st presidential campaign?…. In general terms.
  4. Why did George Washington have trouble sleeping?…. Because he couldn’t lie.
  5. Did Lincoln know that the North would win the Civil War?… After a while, he took it for Grant-ed! (Civil War Jokes & U.S. History Jokes)

Veterans Day: Top Veterans Day Jokes

  1. What was General Washington’s favorite tree?…The infan-tree! (Top 40 4th of July Jokes & Top Arbor Day Jokes)
  2. Teacher “More than 200 years ago, our forefathers defeated the British in the Revolutionary War.”… Student “ Wow! They must have been pretty strong, four men defeating a whole army!” (Top 40 4th of July Jokes)
  3. A Great American Book Never Written: “The Parts of the National Anthem” by Homer D. Brave. (Flag Day Jokes)
  4. Best War of 1812 Book Never Written:… “The Star- Spangled Banner” by Jose Kanusee. (Flag Day Jokes)
  5. Teacher: Johnny, what are the last words of “The Star-Spangled Banner”?… Student:“Play ball”? (Flag Day Jokes)
  6. What did one American flag say to the other flag?… Nothing. It just waved! (Flag Day Jokes)
  7. What did King George think of the American colonists?… He thought they were revolting! (Top 10 4th of July Jokes)
  8. What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?… The Americans licked the British. (Top 40 4th of July Jokes)
  9. What was the craziest battle of the Revolutionary War?… The Battle of Bonkers Hill. (Top 40 4th of July Jokes)

Top Thanksgiving Day Jokes

  1. If April showers bring May flowers, what do Mayflowers bring?… Pilgrims (The Mayflower Ship) (Top Spring Jokes)
  2. What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to?…Plymouth Rock!
  3. What’s the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?… The turkey trot!
  4. Why do pilgrims pants keep falling down?… Because their belt buckles are on their hats!
  5. If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?… Their AGE! (Grandparents Day Jokes)
  6. Who is not hungry at Thanksgiving?… The turkey because he’s already stuffed!
  7. Sister: Mom wants you to help us fix Thanksgiving dinner. Brother: Why? Is it broken
  8. Which November Holiday is Dracula’s favorite?… Fangs-giving (Top Halloween Jokes)
  9. How did the Mayflower show that it liked America?… It hugged the shore! (Top Geography Jokes)
  10. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Gladys… Gladys who?…. Gladys Thanksgiving. Aren’t you?

Black Friday Jokes

  1. What do Black Friday shoppers and the Thanksgiving turkey have in common?… They know what it’s like to be jammed into a small place and stuffed! (Thanksgiving Jokes)
  2. Why do they call the day after Thanksgiving “Black Friday”?… It matches the mood of all those unhappy shoppers. (Thanksgiving Jokes)
  3. What’s the best part about Black Friday?… Resting on Saturday.
  4. Who profits the most on Black Friday?… The one who was smart enough not to go shopping on that day.
  5. What was the horse looking for on Black Friday?… A Macintosh.
  6. What flies faster than items off the rack on Black Friday?… Credit card payment slips!
  7. Which family usually spends the most on Black Friday?… The one who earns the least.
  8. Why do shoppers feel like cranberry juice on Black Friday?… They get bruised and battered bloody by other people until they get squeezed at the cashier.
  9. What did Nala tell Simba subsequent to seeing a crowd of ladies on Black Friday?… You gotta Mufasa (move faster)
  10. What animal flies faster than items off the rack on Black Friday?… Credit card payment vultures.

Fall Jokes

  1. Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?… To make up for his miserable summer. (Top Summer Jokes)
  2. What did the tree say to autumn?… Leave me alone.
  3. How do you fix a broken pumpkin?… With a pumpkin patch.
  4. What reads and lives in an apple?… A bookworm.
  5. What is a tree’s least favorite month?… Sep-timber! (September Jokes)
  6. What did one leaf say to another?… I’m falling for you. (Top Valentines Day Jokes)
  7. Why do trees hate tests? — Because they get stumped by the questions. (365 School Jokes)
  8. How do trees get onto the internet?… Easy, they just LOG on. (Arbor Day Jokes)
  9. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?… Squash.