My Town Tutors is a great resource for parents & teachers. Find qualified tutors in your area today!
Please Share!
Clean Jokes & 365 Family Friendly Jokes
Animal Jokes
- How did the little Scottish puppy feel when he saw a monster?… Terrier-fied! (Top Halloween Jokes)
- What do you call a frozen dog?… A pupsicle (Top Summer Jokes)
- Why did the poor puppy chase his own tail?… He was trying to make both ends meet!
- Why did the puppy cross the road?… To get to the “barking” lot!
- What do you get if you cross a gold puppy with a telephone?… A golden receiver!
- What does my puppy and my phone have in common?… They both have collar I.D.
- What did the skeleton say to the puppy?… bonappetite.
- What do puppies and story tellers have in common?… They both have tails!
- Have you read the book Raising Dogs?… No? you should it’s a pup-up book.
- What’s a dogs favorite kind of pizza?… Pupperoni. (Pizza Jokes)
- Why do puppies bury bones in the ground?… Because you can’t bury them in trees!
- What did the angry man sing when he found his slippers chewed up by the new puppy?… “I must throw that doggie out the window!”
- What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose?… A collie-flower!
- Why do puppies wag their tails?… “Because no one else will do it for them!”
- What is the puppy’s favorite city?… New Yorkie!
- Who is the puppy’s favorite comedian?… Growlcho Marx!
- What did the cowboy say when the bear ate Lassie?… “Well, doggone!”
- What happened when the puppy went to the flea circus?… He stole the show!
- Why was the tree drooling?… It was a dogwood. (Arbor Day Jokes)
- Why didn’t the puppy speak to his foot?… Because it’s not polite to talk back to your paw! (Top Father’s Day Jokes & Top Father’s Day Quotes)
-
What is it called when a cat wins a dog show?… A CAT-HAS-TROPHY! (Top Cat Jokes)
-
What kind of dog does Dracula have?… A bloodhound! (Top Halloween Jokes)
-
What do you get if you cross a Beatle and an Australian dog?… Dingo Starr!
-
What do you call a dog magician?… A labracadabrador.
-
What do you get when you cross a race dog with a bumble bee?… a Greyhound Buzz.
-
What do you call a large dog that meditates?… Aware wolf. (Top Psychology Jokes)
-
Why did the dog need help on his Pros and Cons chart?… He was CON-fused!
-
What do you get when you cross a dog and a calculator?… A friend you can count on.
-
Did you hear about the dog who couldn’t stop talking like a horse?… It was a dog and pony show.
-
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a jelly?… The collie wobbles!
-
What do you call a black Eskimo dog?… A dusky husky!
-
What do you call a cold dog?…A Chilli Dog. (Hot Dog Jokes)
-
How is a dog and a marine biologist alike?… One wags a tail and the other tags a whale. (World Ocean Day Jokes)
-
When does a dog go “moo”?… When it is learning a new language!
-
What kind of dog chases anything red?… A Bulldog.
-
What happened to the dog that swallowed a firefly?… It barked with de-light!
-
What is a dogs favorite instrument?… A trombone.
-
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose?… A collie-flower!
-
What’s a dog’s ideal job?… Barkeology. (Top Archeology Jokes)
-
What kind of dog likes taking a bath?…a shampoodle!
-
What happens when a dog chases a cat into a geysur?…It starts raining cats and dogs.
-
What is a dog’s favorite sport?…Formula 1 drooling! (Car Racing Jokes)
-
Why did the dog wear white sneakers?…Because his boots were at the menders!
-
What is a dog’s favorite food?… Anything that is on your plate!
-
What is the only kind of dog you can eat?… A hot dog! (Hot Dog Jokes)
-
What kind of dog sounds like you can eat it?… A sausage dog! (Hot Dog Jokes)
-
What did the cat say to the dog?…Check meow-t!
-
What do you get if you cross a dog and a cheetah?… A dog that chases cars – and catches them! (Car Racing Jokes)
-
What happens when it rains cats and dogs?… You can step in a poodle!
-
What do you call a dog that licks an electrical socket?… Sparky.
-
Where did the dog fall asleep?… In the barking lot.
-
What time is it when ten dogs chase a cat?… Ten After One.
-
What do you call a dog with a Rolex?… A watch dog.
-
Why was the cat scared of the tree?… Because of its bark.
-
What sort of clothes does a pet dog wear?…A petticoat!
-
What do you call a dog with a fever?… A hot dog. (Hot Dog Jokes)
-
Why can’t dogs work the DVD remote?… Because they always it the Paws button!
-
What did the dog say to the sandpaper?… Ruff.
-
What happened to the dog that ate nothing but garlic?… His bark was much worse than it’s bite!
-
Why wasn’t the dog a smooth talker?… Because all he ever said was “Rough, Rough”
-
What do you call a dog with a surround sound system?… a Sub-woofer.
-
What do dogs eat for breakfast?… Pooched eggs.
-
What is a dogs favorite flower?… Anything in your garden!
-
What’s more amazing than a talking dog?… A Spelling Bee.
-
What’s a dog favorite hobby?… Collecting fleas!
-
What did the dog say to the tree?… Bark
-
How does a dog stop a video?… By pressing the paws button.
-
What is the fastest dog in the world?… A Labraghini.
-
Where do you put barking dogs?… In a barking lot.
-
What was the special offer at the pet store this week?… Buy 1 Dog get 1 Flea!
-
Where do dogs go after their tails fall off?… The re-tail store.
-
What did the dog say to the flea?… Stop bugging me!
-
What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?… a chili dog on a bun! (Hot Dog Jokes)
-
Why did the dog stay in the shade?… Because he did not want to turn into a hot dog. (Hot Dog Jokes)
-
Why did the dog bury himself in the back yard?… Cause you can’t grow a tree without bark.
-
What do you do when your dog goes missing in the forest?… Put your ear to a tree and listen for the bark.
-
What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a meal?… That hit the spots!
-
Why did the dog cross the road twice?… He was trying to fetch a boomerang!
-
What do you get if you cross a cocker spaniel, a poodle and a rooster?… Cockerpoodledoo!
-
What do you call a sheepdog’s tail that can tell tall stories?… A shaggy dogs tale!
-
I asked my dog what’s that thing on top of the house? And the he said “Roof Roof”.
-
What did the tree say to the dog? Tree: Do you like bark? Dog: What do you think? I bark every day of my life.