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Top Psychology JokesPsychology Jokes

Life’s Little Instruction Book by H Jackson Brown Jr.
These statements are taken from the above book. The book contains many great pieces of advice that the author has learned throughout his life. Below is a selected of instructions that might be useful.
Your assignment is to read the instructions quietly and make comments in the columns. It will be collected, graded, and worth 15 points. Simple star, highlight, make notes on individual instructions. You do not need to comment on everyone. The activity will take 20 minutes. If you do not read all the instructions, it is fine. As always, do your best!
1          Compliment 3 people each day.
7          Look people in the eye.
21         Learn 3 clean jokes.
25         Ask for a raise when you feel you’ve earned it.
43         Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen every day.
56         Stop blaming others. Take responsibility for every area of your life.
63         Admit your mistakes.
64         Use your wit to amuse, not abuse.
92         Choose your life’s mate carefully. From this one decision comes 90 % of all your happiness or misery.
96         Attend class reunions.
156       Strive for excellence, not perfection.
171       Never give up on what you really want to do. The person with big dreams is more powerful than one with all the facts.
172       Be kinder than necessary.
186       Be the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.
190       Don’t worry you can’t give your kids the best of everything. Give them your very best.
197       Don’t forget a person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.
202       Show respect for all living things.
204       Choose work that is in harmony with your values.
207       Commit yourself to constant self-improvement.
212       Don’t waste time grieving over past mistakes. Learn from them and move on.
232       Keep your promises.
239       Watch the movie It’s a Wonderful Life every Christmas.
248       Tape record (or video record) your parent’s memories of how they meet and the first years of their marriage.
249       Hire people smarter than you.
252       Keep it simple.
254       Learn to show enthusiasm, even when you don’t feel like it.
259       Take family vacations whether you can afford them or not. The memories will be priceless.
260       Everyday show your family how much you love them with your words, with your touch, and with your thoughtfulness.
264       Don’t gamble.
266       Lie on your back and look at the stars.
273       Leave everything a little better than you found it.
274       Remember that overnight success usually takes about fifteen years.
284       Never underestimate your power to change yourself.
285       Never overestimate your power to change others.
287       Promise big. Deliver Big.
288       Discipline yourself to save money. It is essential to success.
291       Don’t burn bridges. You’ll be surprised how many times you have to cross the same river.
292       Don’t spread yourself too thin. Learn to say no politely and quickly.
294       Keep expectations high.
298       Get in shape and stay in shape.
322       Don’t say you don’t have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci,  Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.
326       Remember that winners do what losers don’t want to do.
330       Live your life as an exclamation, not an explanation.
335       Reread your favorite book.
336       Live your life so that your epitaph could read “No regrets.”
349       Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them.
374       Take charge of your attitude. Don’t let someone else choose it for you.
380       Pay attention to details.
385       Compliment even small improvements.
413       Be enthusiastic about the success of others.
428       Don’t accept “good enough” as good enough.
429       Do more than is expected.
432       Make a list of 25 things you want to experience before you die. Carry it in your wallet and refer to it often. (Many of you did this as an assignment for me in high school.)
439       Every person you meet knows something you don’t; learn from them.
442       When meeting someone you don’t know well, extend your hand and give them your name. Never assume they remember you even if you met them before. (This is true of teacher too. I have had over 400 students since you have graduated.)
445       Never underestimate the power of a kind word or deed.
453       Never compromise your integrity.
459       When you find a job that’s ideal, take it regardless of the pay. If you’ve got what it takes, your salary will soon reflect your value to the company.
463       Don’t use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved.
466       Set short-term and long-term goals.
477       Go the distance. When you accept a task, finish it.
479       Decide to get up thirty minutes earlier. Do this for a year, and you will add seven and one-half days to your waking world.
496       Don’t be called out on strikes. Go down swinging.
500       When you negotiate a salary, think of what you want; then ask for 10% more.
504       Commit yourself to quality.
507       Your mind can only hold one thought at a time. Make it a positive and constructive one.
508       Be someone’s hero.
541       Keep a diary of your accomplishments at work. Then when you ask for a raise, you’ll have the information you need to back it up.
555       Remember that everyone you meet is afraid of something, loves something, and has lost something.
567       Remember the three Rs: Respect for self; respect for others; Responsibility for all your actions.
573       Don’t overlook life’s small joys while searching for the big ones.
575       Never be photographed with a cocktail glass in your hand.
592       Be the first to fight for a just cause.
594       Remember that no time spent with your children is ever wasted.
629       Do your homework and know your facts, but remember it’s passion that persuades.
668       Pay as much attention to the things that are working positively in your life as you do to those that are giving you trouble.
669       Spend some time alone.
681       Be quick to take advantage of an advantage.
700       Conduct yourself in such a way that your high school would want you to address the graduating seniors.
703       Watch your attitude. It’s the first thing people notice about you.
711       Read more books.
712       Watch less TV.
722       Become your children’s best teacher and coach.
806       Don’t take good friends, good health, or good marriage for granted.
822       Learn three knock-knock jokes so that you will always be ready to entertain children
835       Start everyday with the most important thing you have to do. Save the less important tasks for later.
840       When there is a hill to climb, don’t think that waiting will make it smaller.
869       Spend your life lifting people up, not putting people down.
965       Never ignore evil.
968       Remember this statement by Lou Holtz: Life is 10% of what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it.”
981       Be better prepared than you think you need to be.
990       Give handout materials after your presentation, never before.
1021     Someone will always be looking at you as an example of how to behave. Don’t let that person down.
1036     Be thankful you were born in this country
1038     Enjoy the satisfaction that comes from doing little things well.
1055     Never hesitate to do what is right.
1056     Don’t work for recognition, but do work worthy of recognition.
1057     Share your knowledge and experiences.
1071     Remember the word discipline means “to teach.”
1075     Remember that all success comes at a price.
1086     Spend twice as much time praising as criticizing.
1090     Remember the credo of Walt Disney” “Think. Believe. Dream. Dare.”
1094     Remember life’s big changes rarely give warning.
1095     What you have to do, do whole-heartedly.
1113     Start a “smile file” of jokes, articles, and cartoons that make you laugh.
1119     Look for the opportunity that is hidden in every adversity.
1150     Type out your favorite quotation and place it where you can see it everyday.
1157     Offer hope.
1165     Never ask a childless couple when they are going to have children.
1200     Remember you can miss a lot of good things in life by having the wrong attitude.
1229     Teach your children the pride, satisfaction, and dignity of doing any job well.
1239     Remember the cruel words deeply hurt.
1240     Remember that loving words quickly heal.
1244     Keep a special notebook. Every night before going to bed, make a note of something beautiful you saw during the day.
1249     Ask your grandparents to tell you stories about your parents while they were growing up.
1252     To help your children turn out well, spend twice as much time with them and half as much money.
1394     Teach your children when dividing something, the other person gets first pick of the two pieces.
1421     When you complete a course, shake the instructor’s hand and thank him or her.
1432     Call three friends on Thanksgiving and tell them how thankful you are for their friendship.
1438     Learn your great grandparents’ names and what they did.
1451     Savor every day.
1468     Read biographies of successful men and women.
1473     Ask yourself if what you’re doing today is getting you closer to where you want to be tomorrow.
1476     Don’t expect different results from the same behavior.
1482     Treat your parents to dinner out on your birthday.
1500     Write a thank-you note to your children’s teacher when you see your child learning new things.
1518     Remember the main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing.
1532     Don’t forget your attitude is just as important as the facts.
1535     Take your dad bowling.
This is a phenomenal book with many other great pieces of advice. You may want to purchase a copy for yourself.
If you wish to purchase the book or contact the author here is the information taken from his website.
Taken from the book:
“I’d Love to Hear from You

Should you have any comments regarding my books, positive or otherwise, I’d like to hear from you. Every letter and e-mail is read and appreciated.
H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
P.O. Box 150014
Nashville, TN 37215″