Milk Jokes: Milk Day Jokes

1. What did one dairy cow say to another?…  Got milk?
2. What do you call a cow that doesn’t give milk?… A MILK DUD! (Candy Jokes)
3. Why don’t cows have any money?… Because farmers milk them dry. (Farming Jokes)
4. What does an invisible man drink?… Evaporated milk! (Halloween Jokes)
5. Where do Russians get their milk?… From Mos-cows (World Geography Jokes)
6. What did mama cow say to baby cow?… It’s pasture bedtime. (Mother’s Day Jokes)
7. Do you know why the cow jumped over the moon?… The farmer had cold hands. (Full Moon Jokes)
8. Why did the cow cross the road?… To get to the udder side.
9. How easy is it to milk a cow?… It’s a piece of steak.
10. Why does a milking stool have only 3 legs?… Because the cow has the utter. (Biology Jokes)

Cow Jokes

1. What do you get if you cross an angry sheep and an upset cow?… An animal that’s in a baaaaaaaad moooooood. (Psychology Jokes)
2. Why did the cow cross the road?… To get to the udder side.
3. What do you call a cow you can’t see?… Camooflauged. (Veterans Day Jokes)
4. How easy is it to milk a cow?… It’s a piece of steak.
5. Why does a milking stool have only 3 legs?… Because the cow has the utter. (Biology Jokes)
6. What do cows do while skiing?… Moo-Guls! (Skiing Jokes)
7. How do you make a milkshake?… Give a cow a pogo stick.
8. What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?… Bullogna
9. What does a cow put on his french toast?… Moooolasses.
10. What do you call an evil cow?… De-mooooon.
11. Why was the cow so scared?… Because he was a cow-ard.
12. What do you call a cow who works for a gardener?… A lawn moo-er.
13. Where do cows go for lunch?… The calf-eteria.
14. What do you call a cow that can cut the grass?… Mulan.
15. Which job is a cow most suited for?… Baker. Because they’re making cow pies regularly. (Pi Day Jokes)
16. “Where did the cows go last night”?…”To the mooon” (Full Moon Jokes)
17. What do you call a cow with an assistant?… Moooooving up in the world.
18. Why can’t a cow become a detective?… They refuse to go on Steakouts!
19. How does a cow get to the mooooon?… It flies through udder space! (Astronomy Jokes)
20. What happens when you talk to a cow?… It goes in one ear and out the udder! (Biology Jokes)
21. What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?… Laughing stock.
22. What is a cows favorite color?… Maroooooooon.
23. What do you call a sleeping bull?… A bulldozer.
24. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a dairy cow?… Peanut butter.
25. What do u call a really strong cow?… Beefy.
26. What do you get when you walk under a cow?… A pat on the head. (Biology Jokes)
27. What are a cows favorite subjects in school?… Moosic, psycowolgy, cowculus (365 School Jokes)
28. What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck?… Milk and Quackers!
29. What do you call it when a cow jumps over a barbed wire fence?… Udder-Catastrophe
30. Where do you find the most cows?… Moo-York (Top Geography Jokes)
31. What do cows get when they are sick?… Hay Fever
32. Why does a milking stool have only three legs?… Because the cow has the udder.
33. What do you call a sad cow?… Mooooved to tears.
34. Did you hear that Chuck Norris is a matador?… He takes the bull by the horns.
35. Where did the bull lose all his money?… At the Cowsino.
36. What did the cow say to the lousy renter?… Moooooooooo your self out of here.
37. How can you tell which cow is the best dancer?… Wait til one busts a moooooove.
38. Why do cows wear bells?… Their horns don’t work.
39. What kind of milk comes from a forgetful cow?… Milk of Amnesia (Psychology Jokes)
40. What Is A Cows Favorite Type Of Math?… Moo-tiplication (Pi Day Jokes)
41. Where do cows go when they want a night out?… To the moo-vies!
42. What do you call a cow with a twitch?… Beef Jerky
43. What was the bull doing in the pasture with his eyes closed?… Bull-dozin’
44. What did the bored cow say when she got up in the morning?… “It’s just an udder day”
45. How does a farmer count a herd of cows?… With a Cowculator! (Pi Day Jokes)
46. Where do Russians get their milk?… From Mos-cows (World Geography Jokes)
47. Did you hear about the snobby cow?… She thought she was a cutlet above the rest!
48. What’s a cow’s favorite moosical note?… Beef-flat
49. What did the cow say to the turtle?… Get a moove on.
50. What do you call a cow that’s afraid of the dark?… A coward.
51. Why are cows so soft?… Because they are made out of leather.
52. What do cows wear in Hawaii?… Moo- moos (Top Geography Jokes)
53. How does one cow talk to another?… Cow-munication.
54. What do call a cow that has just had a calf?… Decalfenated (Coffee Jokes)
55. Where do cows get their weapons?… Ar-moooo-ries. (Veterans Day Jokes)
56. Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?…  Because her horn didn’t work
57. Did you hear that NASA recently launched a bunch of Holsteins into low Earth orbit?… They called it the Herd Shot ‘Round The World! (U.S. History Jokes)
58. What do you call a cow that doesn’t give milk?… A MILK DUD! (Candy Jokes)
59. What did the cow say when a person played the piano?… That’s good moooooosic.
60. What do you call a cow that doesn’t give milk?… An udder failure.
61. What do you call a cow on the barnyard floor?… Ground Beef
62. Where do cows get together?… The meet market.
63. What do you call a cow who works for a gardener?… a lawn moo-er.
64. What do you call a cow with full armor?… Sir loin
65. What do you call it when one bull spies on another bull?… A steak-out!
66. What do you call a cow with no front legs?… Lean Beef
67. What do you call a cow with no legs at all?… Ground beef
68. What band is a cow favorite?… Moody Blues
69. What do you call a grumpy cow?… Moo-dy
70. Why is the barn so noisy?… Because all of the cows have horns.
71. Where do cows like to ride on trains?…  In the cow-boose.
72. What do cows get when they do all their chores?…  Mooooney.
73. What did one dairy cow say to another?…  Got milk?
74. How to you know that cows will be in heaven?…  It’s a place of udder delight.
75. When is a farmer like a magician?…  When he turns his cow into pasture.
76. Why is a barn so noisy?…  All the cows have horns.
77. What do you get when you cross and smurf and a cow?…  Blue cheese!
78. What did the secret agent cow say to the other cow?…  Are you udder cover?
79. Why can’t the bankrupt cowboy complain?…  He’s got no beef.
80. What animals do you bring to bed?…  Your calves.
81. What happened to the lost cattle?…  Nobody’s herd.
82. Where does a cow stop to drink?…  The milky way! (Astronomy Jokes)
83. What do you get when you cross a cow and a lawnmower?…  A lawnmooer.
84. How do you stop a bull from charging?…  Take away his credit card!
85. Why don’t you tell a cow a secret?…  Because it goes in one ear and out the udder (Biology Jokes)
86. What does an invisible man drink?…  Evaporated milk! (Halloween Jokes)
87. Why does the cow bring toilet paper to the party?…Because he is a party pooper.
88. What newspaper do cows read?… The Daily Moos.
89. What do you find a gallery of cows?… The mooseum.
90. What do you call I half a cow?… a calf.
91. What was the first animal in space?…  The cow that jumped over the moon! (Full Moon Jokes)
92. What is it when one cow spies on another cow?… A steak out. (Police Jokes)
93. What happens when a cow laughs too hard?… It Cowlapses!
94. What is the difference between a car and a bull?… A car only has one horn.
95. What do you get when you give pasta to a cow?… Beefaroni.
96. What did one cow say to the other?… Mooooooove over!
97. What has four legs and goes Oom, Oom?… A cow walking backwards!
98. Where does a cow stay when it is on vacation?… A moo-tel!
99. Why was the cow sad?… She was moody. (Top Psychology Jokes)
100. What do cows read in the mornings?… The moospaper.
101. What did the farmer say to the cow?… Produce some milk