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180 School Jokes: Start Your Day with a Smile!Clean Jokes

Ocean Jokes for Kids
Top Earth Day Quotes

  1. How do trees get on the internet?… They log in. (Arbor Day Jokes)
  2. “I have an obsession with wind farms.” “Really?” “Yes. I’m a huge fan.”
  3. What did one lightening bolt say to the other lightening bolt?… You’re shocking!
  4. How can you tell the ocean is friendly?… It waves. (Ocean Jokes for Kids)
  5. What’s a tornado’s favorite game?… Twister!
  6. How do hurricanes see?… With one eye!
  7. What does a cloud wear under his pants?… Thunderwear!
  8. What kind of bow can’t be tied?… A rainbow!
  9. What is a tree’s least favorite month?… Sep-timber! (September Jokes)
  10. What did Obi Wan Kenobi say to the tree?… May the Forest be with you. (Star Wars Jokes for Kids)
  11. What did the ground say to the earthquake?… You crack me up!
  12. Which fish is the most famous in the ocean?… The star fish! (Top Animal Jokes for Kids)
  13. Why did the sun go to school?… To get brighter. (Top College Jokes for Kids)
  14. How do you cut a wave in half?… Use a sea saw.
  15. What is a shark’s favorite game?… Swallow the leader! (Shark Jokes for Kids)
  16. What did one firefly say to the other?… Got to glow now!
  17. Why did the leaf go to the doctor?… It was feeling green! (Fall Jokes)
  18. What did the tree wear to the pool party?… Swimming trunks! (Summer Jokes for Kids)
  19. What happens when it rains cats and dogs?… You have to be careful  to not step in a poodle! (Animal Jokes for Kids)
  20. What did one volcano say to the other volcano?… I lava you!
  21. What kind of hair do oceans have?… Wavy! (Ocean Jokes for Kids)
  22. Do bees fly in the rain?… Not without their yellow jackets!
  23. What kind of plant grow on your hand?… Palm tree. (Top Biology Jokes)
  24. Knock Knock!… Who’s there?… Lettuce… Lettuce who?… Lettuce in, it’s hot outside!
  25. What do you call a rooster that crows every morning?… An alarm cluck!
  26. Why are people always tired on Earth Day?… Because they just finished a long March. (Funny Jokes for Each Month)
  27. Why did the leaf go to the doctor?… It was feeling green.
  28. Why is grass so dangerous?… Because it’s full of blades.
  29. What did the little tree say to the big tree?… Leaf me alone!
  30. What’s the biggest moth in the world?… A mammoth!
  31. Why are recycle bins optimistic?… Because they’re full of cans.
  32. What’s the difference between weather and climate?… You can’t weather a tree, but you can climate.
  33. Why did the woman go outdoors with her purse open?… Because she expected some change in the weather.
  34. Why do tornadoes zigzag?… They’re dizzy.
  35. What did the Pacific Ocean say to the Atlantic Ocean?… Nothing, it just waved!
  36. What has no beginning, end or middle & touches every continent?… The Ocean.
  37. Did you hear about the lawyer who tried to sue a shark for biting all his limbs off?… He didn’t have a leg to stand on! (Shark Jokes for Kids)

Place for 2018

  1. Do you know where fishes work?… The Offish! (Top Animal Jokes for Kids)
  2. What did the beach say to the wave?… “Long tide, no sea.”
  3. Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?… Because they spend years at C! (Pirate Jokes for Kids)
  4. Did you hear about the red ship that collided with the blue ship?… All the sailors were marooned.
  5. Where does a killer whale go for braces?… The orca-dontist. (Dentist Jokes for Kids)
  6. What is the strongest creature in the ocean?… A mussel! (Sports Jokes for Kids)
  7. What is the best way to communicate with a fish?… Drop it a line!
  8. Why did the fisherman start doing drugs?… Pier pressure.
  9. What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea?… It gets wet.
  10. What did Cinderella wear when she went swimming in the ocean?… Glass flippers!
  11. What did one wave say to the other wave?… Nothing. It just waved.
  12. What did one tidepool say to the other tidepool?… Show me your mussels. (Sports Jokes for Kids)
  13. Why don’t oysters give to charity?… Because they’re shellfish!
  14. Which bus crossed the Atlantic Ocean?… Christopher ColumBUS. (Columbus Day Jokes)
  15. Have you heard about the restaurant that caters only to dolphins?… It only has 1 customer, but at least it serves a porpoise. (Dolphin Jokes)
  16. What does seaweed say when it’s stuck at the bottom of the sea?… “Kelp! Kelp!”
  17. Why are seabirds so lucky in love?… Because one good tern always deserves another. (Bird Jokes)
  18. What happens when you throw a red rock in the Black Sea?… It sinks to the bottom.
  19. What happened to the shark that swallowed a bunch of keys?…It got lockjaw. (Shark Jokes for Kids)
  20. What did the shark plead in the murder case?…Not gill-ty. (Shark Jokes for Kids)
  21. Why are there fish at the bottom of the sea?… Because they dropped out of school.
  22. Where do crabs & lobsters catch their trains?… Kings Crustacean. (Lobster Jokes)
  23. What puts the white lines on the ocean?… An ocean liner.

PG-13

  1. How do oil companies deal with with oil spills?… Slick lawyers.
  2. How do Republicans plan on fighting record high temperatures?… By switching from Fahrenheit to Celsius!
  3. Why does a Time Magazine survey state only 85% of Americans think global warming is happening?… The other 15 percent work for the oil industry!
  4. How many climate skeptics does it take to change a lightbulb?… None. It’s too early to say if the light bulb needs changing.
  5. What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse?…The Codfather.
  6. Why did the lobster blush?… Because the sea weed.
  7. What does a mermaid wear to maths lessons?… An algae-bra
  8. Why did the algae & the fungus get married?… They took a lichen to each other (although, unfortunately, their marriage is now on the rocks)
  9. What is a cetacean’s favorite TV show?… Whale of fortune.
  10. Where do shellfish go to borrow money?… The prawn broker.
  11. What is a blue whale’s favorite James Bond Film?… Licence to Krill.
  12. Where does seaweed look for a job?… In the ‘Kelp-wanted’ ads.
  13. A salmon walks into a vegetarian restaurant and the waiter says, “Sorry, we don’t serve fish.”
  14. What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?… A nervous wreck.
  15. Where do you calculate the mass of a cetacean?… At a Whale-Weigh Station.
  16. Algae A (to Algae B): “How are things?”Algae B: “Good thanks; business is blooming.”
  17. Why does the mermaid wear seashells?…Because she grew out of her B-shells.
  18. Why did the seawater keep walking around in circles?… Because it was gyred.
  19. What did one flat-fish parasite say to the other at the end of their date?… “Your plaice or mine?”
  20. How can you amplify a pirate’s DNA?… PC Arghhh.