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Grinch Jokes

  1. Knock knockout?…Who is there?…Boo… Boo Who?… Don’t cry! We promise for find the best Dr. Seuss jokes! (Knock Knock Jokes for Kids)
  2. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite school subject?… HISStory. (Cat Jokes & Social Studies Jokes)
  3. What do you call someone who watches you take a test while wearing a vest?… Proctor Seuss. (Jokes for Teachers)
  4. What do you call a Dr. Seuss character with a medical degree?… Doctor Who. (Doctor Jokes)
  5. What is the Cat in the Hat ‘s favorite cereal?… Mice Krispies. (Cat Jokes & Cereal Jokes)
  6. What is the Grinch’s least favorite band?… The Who. (Music Jokes)
  7. I saw a picture online that had Dre, Seuss, and House cropped into the background… Clearly it had been doctored. (Doctor Jokes)
  8. What’s black and white and read all over?… The Cat in the Hat. (Cat Jokes)
  9. What does the Cat in the Hat like to eat for breakfast?… Green Eggs and Ham. (Pig Jokes & Breakfast Jokes)
  10. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Canoe… Canoe Who?… Canoe tell me what is the real name of the author who wrote the book The Cat in the Hat?… Dr. Theodore Seuss Geisel (Canoe Jokes & Grinch Jokes)
  11. What is the title of the unauthorized autobiography of the Cat in the Hat … Hiss and Tell. (Cat Jokes & Book Jokes)
  12. What Dr. Seuss baseball book was never published?… “The Cat at Bat!” (101 Baseball Jokes & Book Jokes)
  13. Where does the Cat in the Hat go when he’s sick?… To Dr. Seuss. (Cat Jokes & Doctor Jokes)
  14. What is the difference between a comma and the Cat in the Hat?… One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause. (Grammar Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  15. Why did the Cat in the Hat put the letter “M” into the freezer?… To turn “ice” into “mice” (Cat Jokes & Ice Cream Jokes)
  16. I’ve heard the reviews for the new Grinch movie have been bad. One reviewer asked theater goers if they would watch The Grinch or a video of a sea sick crocodile, and 90% proffered watching the sea sick crocodile. (Movie Jokes)
  17. What does the Cat in the Hat wear when he sleeps?… paw-jamas! (Cat Jokes & Napping Jokes)
  18. How did the Grinch know to average all of the presents he stole, so that each Who in Whoville got the same amount returned to them?… He’s a mean one, Mr. Grinch. (Math Jokes for Kids
  19. What grade did the Cat in the Hat get on his math test?… A Purrrr-fect score! (Math Jokes for Kids & Cat Jokes)
  20. How does the Cat in the Hat get what he wants?… With purr-suasion. (Cat Jokes & Psychology Jokes)
  21. What do you get when you mix Dr. Seuss with George Michael?… Green Eggs and Wham! (365 Music Jokes)
  22. What was Dr. Seuss’ mom’s job?… She was a Ma Seuss. (Labor Day Jokes)
  23. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite brand of sneaker?… Mew Balance. (Cat Jokes Track and Field Jokes)
  24. Why doesn’t the Grinch like knock knock jokes?… Because there’s always Whos there! (Christmas Knock Knock Jokes & Dr. Seuss Knock Knock Jokes)
  25. If lights run on electricity and buses run on gas, what does the Cat in the Hat run on?… His paws. (Cat Jokes Track and Field Jokes)
  26. What do you call the chocolate bars the Grinch stole?… Hot chocolate. (Chocolate Jokes & Candy Jokes)
  27. Did you hear about the robber who came into daycare and stole all of Doctor Seuss’s books?… It was a nursery crime. (Book Jokes & Police Jokes)
  28. Why did the chicken cross the road? DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I’ve not been told. (Chicken Jokes)
  29. What’s the difference between someone who doesn’t understand figures of speech, and the Grinch?… The first takes things literally. The other takes things, literally! (Grammar Jokes)
  30. What does the Cat in the Hat use to make his coffee?… A purr-colator. (Cat Jokes & Coffee Jokes)
  31. What does the Cat in the Hat read in the morning?… The mewspaper. (Cat Jokes)
  32. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite musical?… The Sound of Mewsic. (Cat Jokes & Music Jokes)
  33. What is Sam-I-am’s middle name?… “I”
  34. What’s the difference between Batman and the Grinch?… Batman can go into Whoville without Robin! (Batman Jokes)
  35. Why couldn’t the Grinch steal Christmas?… Because of the Santa clause. (Police Jokes & Grammar Jokes)
  36. Where does the Grinch go to watch movies?… The IMAX! (Movie Jokes)
  37. What is the Grinch’s favorite play?… Green Eggs and Hamlet! (Egg Jokes & Book Jokes)
  38. What does the the Cat in the Hat do when he gets mad?… He has a hissy fit. (Cat Jokes)
  39. Why did the Cat in the Hat want to be friends with the fish?… He thought it was a cat fish. (Cat Jokes & Fish Jokes)
  40. Knock, knock!… Who’s there?… Who!… Who who?… Who who who do you think you are, Dr. Seuss? (Dr. Seuss Knock Knock Jokes)
  41. What is the Cat in the Hat’s best event in gymnastics?… The balance beam! (Cat Jokes & Gymnastics Jokes)
  42. How fast did the Grinch’s sled go?… Max speed. (Dr. Seuss Jokes)
  43. Why is the Cat in the Hat such a good piano player?… Because he is very mewsical. (Cat Jokes / Music Jokes / Piano Jokes)
  44. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite candy bar?… Thingamajig. (Cat Jokes & Candy Jokes)
  45. Why is the Cat in the Hat so good at video games?… Because he starts with nine lives! (Cat Jokes)
  46. What does the Grinch eat for dessert?… Heist cream! (Ice Cream Jokes & Police Jokes)
  47. What color does the Cat in the Hat like the most?… Purrr-ple. (Cat Jokes)
  48. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite show on TV?… The evening mews. (Cat Jokes)
  49. How does the Cat in the Hat sing scales?… Do-ri-me-ow. (Cat Jokes & Music Jokes)
  50. What’s the Grinch’s favorite board game?…  Mean-opoly! 
  51. What do you wear to show you care that it’s Dr. Seuss’ birthday on this early March winter day?… A hat! (Birthday Jokes & Hat Jokes)
  52. What did the Lorax say when the tree fell on him?… “I’m stumped!” (Tree Jokes)
  53. What do you call the Cat in the Hat when he wears winter shoes?… Puss in boots. (Cat Jokes & Winter Jokes)
  54. Which vegetable does the Cat in the Hat like the most?… As-purr-agus. (Cat Jokes & Farming Jokes)
  55. Why did the Grinch go down the chimney?… Because it sooted him!
  56. What happened when the Grinch went to the flea circus?… He stole the show!
  57. What does the Grinch see with?… Burglarize! (Police Jokes)
  58. Why can’t the Grinch get down from Mount Crumpit?… You can only get down from birds! (Hiking Jokes & Bird Jokes)
  59. What do you call a magician in a Dr. Seuss book?… Who-dini. (Magic Jokes)
  60. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite birthday party game?… Mews-ical chairs. (Cat Jokes & Birthday Jokes)
  61. What did the Cat in the Hat order at the restaurant?… One fish, two fish, red fish and a blue fish. (Cat Jokes & Fish Jokes)
  62. What does the Cat in the Hat use to keep his grass trimmed?… A lawn meower. (Cat Jokes & Summer Jokes)
  63. What do people say when they hear the Grinch stealing from them?… Who goes there? (Police Jokes)
  64. What is another name for the Cat in the Hat’s apartment?… A scratch pad. (Cat Jokes)
  65. What did Mr. Turkey say to the Grinch?… We would like to hire you to steal Thanksgiving. (Thanksgiving Jokes)
  66. What did the Grinch say when he was caught stealing from a French art museum?… I did it for the Monet! (Art Jokes)
  67. Why was it so hard to miss the Grinch on Christmas morning?… He had all the presence. 
  68. What does the Cat in the Hat like to eat on hot days?… Mice cream cones. (Cat Jokes & Ice Cream Jokes)
  69. Why do so many people love the Cat in the Hat?… They think he’s purrrr-fect. (Cat Jokes)
  70. What do you call the Cat in the Hat when he’s walking on snow?… A cool cat. (Cat Jokes & Winter Jokes)
  71. What is a the Cat in the Hat’s favorite brand of car?… The Catillac. (Cat Jokes & Car Jokes)
  72. How did the city folk in Whoville refer to the Grinch?… As a Hill-Bully. (Anti-Bullying Blogs)
  73. Why was the Grinch invited to the Cinco de Mayo party?… They thought he was a giant avocado. (Cinco De Mayo Jokes)
  74. Where does the Cat in the Hat perform?… At the Circus McGurkus. (Cat Jokes & Circus Jokes)
  75. Why was the Cat in the Hat so crabby?… He was in a bad mewd. (Cat Jokes)
  76. What happens when the Cat in the Hat drinks vinegar?… He turns into a sourpuss. (Cat Jokes)
  77. What band did Dr Seuss make?… The Who. (365 Music Jokes)
  78. What job did the Cat in the Hat have at the circus?… Acrocat. (Cat Jokes & Circus Jokes)
  79. Why was the Cat in the Hat so good with money?… He knew how to balance a checkbook! (Cat Jokes)
  80. What do you call a Dr. Seuss character who loves to rap?… The Hop on Pop star. (365 Music Jokes)
  81. Why did the Grinch not steal any kitchen utensils?… He decided it wasn’t worth the whisk! (Police Jokes)
  82. What kind of musician is the Cat in the Hat ?… A purr-cussionist. (Music Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  83. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite song?… Three Blind Mice! ((Music Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  84. Why was the Grinch afraid of Santa Claus?… He was Claustrophobic. (Psychology Jokes)
  85. Why can’t the Cat in the Hat go to middle school?… You’re not allowed to wear hats in school! (Hat Jokes & Middle School Jokes)
  86. What does the Cat in the Hat say on stage?… Tabby or not tabby, that is the question. (Cat Jokes)
  87. What happens when you give the Cat in the Hat a Rubik’s cube?… It gets purr-plexed. (Cat Jokes)
  88. Why did the Cat in the Hat run away from the tree?… It was afraid of the bark! (Cat Jokes & Tree Jokes)
  89. What is Thing 1 and Thing 2?… Thing 3! (Math Jokes for Kids)
  90. What kind of yard work does the Cat in the Hat like the most?… Meowing the lawn. (Cat Jokes & Summer Jokes)
  91. If the Cat in the Hat gets married, he’ll have to change his name to the Cat in the Veil.
  92. How is the Cat in the Hat like a coin?… It has a head on one side and tail on the other. (Cat Jokes & Biology Jokes)
  93. Why did the Grinch not steal any kitchen utensils?… He decided it wasn’t worth the whisk! (Police Jokes)
  94. What Dr. Seuss’s book do they read every morning in Canada?… Tim Hortons hears a Who. (Canada Jokes)
  95. The cat in the hat told a purr-fect joke… it was simply fur-tastic! (Cat Jokes) 
  96. Why did the Grinch get a burglar alarm?… Because he needs to get up on time! (Police Jokes)
  97. Where does the Grinch keep his money?… In a snow bank. (Snow Jokes / Grinch Jokes)
  98. Why did the Grinch go to the liquor store?… To find some Christmas spirit. (Beer Jokes)
  99. Why was the Grinch so bad at playing Crazy 8’s?… He was green (he never played before).
  100. I told my wife that I thought that the Grinch’s voice was a little strange… But the wife said “Who?”
  101. Knock knock… Who’s there?… That’s right, the who’s are here! (Christmas Knock Knock Jokes)
  102. What did the Cat in the Hat say when the dog ate its food?… You gotta be kitten me. (Cat Jokes & Dog Jokes)
  103. Knock, knock!… Who’s there?… Wanda!… Wanda who?… Wanda-ful day to read some Dr. Seuss books! (Dr. Seuss Knock Knock Jokes)
  104. What is the Cat in the Hat’s favorite magazine?… Good Mousekeeping. (Cat Jokes)
  105. What would Sally’s mom say if she saw the messy house?… What a CATastrophe! (Cat Jokes)
  106. What looks like half a Cat in the Hat ?… The other half. (Cat Jokes)
  107. How does the Cat in the Hat eat ice cream?… With his mouth just like everyone else. (Cat Jokes & Ice Cream Jokes)
  108. Knock, knock!… Who’s there?… Sam!… Sam who?… Sam I am, and I love green eggs and ham! (Dr. Seuss Knock Knock Jokes)
  109. What’s the first thing the Cat in the Hat does in the morning?… He wakes up! (Cat Jokes)
  110. Why can’t the Cat in the Hat go to high school?… You’re not allowed to wear hats in school! (Hat Jokes & Middle School Jokes)
  111. Why can’t the Cat in the Hat go to elementary school?… You’re not allowed to wear hats in school! (Hat Jokes & Middle School Jokes)
  112. Why did Dr. Seuss put a ruler under his pillow?… To see how long he slept. (Napping Jokes)
  113. How do you know the Cat in the Hat used your computer?… Your mouse has teeth marks on it. (Cat Jokes)
  114. Did you know Dr. Seuss once invented a new dance move?… It was called the “Fox in Socks Shuffle.” (Dance Jokes)
  115. Why did the Cat in the Hat pour oil on the mouse?… Because it squeaked. (Cat Jokes)
  116. Why did the Cat in the Hat cross the road?… It was the chicken’s day off. (Cat Jokes & Chicken Jokes)
  117. If Dr. Seuss was an artist… he would paint masterpieces using his Cat in the Brush. (Art Jokes)
  118. The Lorax heard a funny joke and laughed so hard, he sprouted a seed of laughter.
    (Gardening Jokes)
  119. Why didn’t the Cat in the Hat ever get grounded?… His mother did not mind anything he did at all. (Cat Jokes & Middle School Jokes)
  120. What does the Cat in the Hat put up when the rain comes down?… His umbrella! (Cat Jokes & Rain Jokes)
  121. Green Eggs and Ham might not be my first choice for breakfast… but it is a cracking read! (Egg Jokes)
  122. Don’t trust the Yertle the Turtle… he’s always trying to shell out a bad deal. (Turtle Jokes)
  123. If the Cat in the Hat can jump five feet high, then why can’t he jump through a three foot high window?… The window is closed. (Cat Jokes)
  124. What did the Cat in the Hat name his dog?… Spot! (Cat Jokes & Dog Jokes)
  125. Why does the Cat in the Hat seem so smart?… Because he knows a lot about that! (Cat Jokes)
  126. Which side of the Cat in the Hat has the most fur?… The outside. (Cat Jokes)
  127. Why doesn’t the Cat in the Hat know about this?… Because he only knows a lot about that! (Cat Jokes)
  128. If Dr. Seuss became a gardener, he’d probably create a new plant called the “Sneetch-seed Tree.” (Gardening Jokes)
  129. When Dr. Seuss goes to the chiropractor, he says, “I’m feeling a little crook today!
  130. Dr. Seuss had a great sense of humor… his jokes were really Horton point.
  131. If Dr. Seuss were a chef, he would probably cook green eggs and ham-flavored ice cream.
  132. Dr. Seuss never missed breakfast… he always started his day with a plate of Grin-ola.
  133. If Dr. Seuss became a barber… he’d tell you to relax and wait for your hair to come Backs. (Barber Jokes)
  134. If Dr. Seuss had a favorite sport, it would be relay-races because of all the rhyming opportunities. (Track and Field Jokes)
  135. Dr. Seuss visited the dentist regularly, his toothy grin was always Cavity in the Hat. (Dentist Jokes)
  136. Did you hear the rumor about Dr. Seuss playing hide-and-seek?… They say he’s a real Sneetch!
  137. The Grinch wrote a novel, but the publishers said it was too Who-long and rejected it. (Book Jokes)
  138. Dr. Seuss loves staying hydrated, his favorite drink is Yink’s Pink Ink Drink.
  139. If Dr. Seuss was a contractor… he’d specialize in building Truffula Treehouses. (Tree Jokes)
  140. The Whos organize a dance party every year… it’s always a Who-riffic celebration! (Dance Jokes)
  141. Why did the Lorax go to the doctor?… He had a bad case of tree-morsels. (Doctor Jokes)
  142. I asked the Cat in the Hat for some fashion advice… but he just told me to be a trend-setter-sitter.
  143. Why did Horton the elephant go to law school?… He wanted to become an expert in heara-phernalia. (Lawyer Jokes)
  144. How did Thing 1 and Thing 2 get in trouble?… They were caught playing aThing punishable by law. (Police Jokes)
  145. Did you know the Grinch owns a bakery?… He makes pastries that are always grrrrr-umptious!
  146. Life is a zoo-sical… just ask all the animals in Dr. Seuss’s books. (Zoo Jokes)
  147. What did the Sneetches say when they saw a mirror?… We’re looking pretty fly with our stars.
  148. Why don’t you want to get on the wrong side of the Fox in Socks?… He’ll make your feet tangled like spaghetti. (Spaghetti Jokes) 
  149. How did the Cat in the Hat excel in maths?… He always knew how to count on his whiskers. (Math Jokes for Kids)
  150. The Once-ler’s fashion line doesn’t do well because it only sells Thneedles-sly expensive clothes.
  151. Beware of the Grinch’s market stall… his prices are always greener on the other side.
  152. I tried to make a Wocket in my pocket… but it turned out to be a croc-a-doodle-Whock!
  153. Hop on Pop won the award for the best jumping routine… he was just so good with the bouncy houses.
  154. Did you hear about the marathon from Mulberry Street?… The runners got lost because they zigged when they should have zagged! (Marathon Jokes)
  155. Whos and Horton share a love for good puns, they always “hear” the funniest jokes.
  156. Why did the fish like Dr. Seuss books?… Because they were great for story TELLING!
  157. What is the favorite Dr. Seuss book of a plant enthusiast?… “The Cat in the Hat-urn-on-a-truffula-tree!”
  158. How did the elephant build a house?… With Horton hears a “woo-dock”!
  159. Why did the Sneetch bring a ladder to the beach?… To reach for the stars in their bellies!
  160. Why did Sam-I-Am become a successful chef?… Because he always season his food with a lot of green eggs and ham-on! 6.
  161. Why did the Grinch become a personal trainer?… Because he knew the true “strength of a mean-one”!
  162. How do you know the Lorax is in the library?… Because you can hear him “Truffula-reading”!
  163. Why did Thing One and Thing Two become hairstylists?… A: They loved giving “Whos!”
  164. Why is the Cat in the Hat always invited to parties?… He brings the “rhyme” of his life!
  165. How does the Lorax bring positivity into people’s lives?… A: He always plants “seeds of encouragement!
  166. Why did Horton the Elephant take a bath?… He wanted to be trunk-fresh.
  167. What is the favorite Dr. Seuss book of a car mechanic?… “Oh, the Places You’ll go VROOM!”
  168. How do you know the cat had a great day?… He is always “grinning and Seussing!”
  169. Why did the big circus elephant read Dr. Seuss?… A: He loved a good “horton-mment!”
  170. How did the Grinch succeed in the stock market?… A: He always had a “paws-itive” outlook!
  171. How do you catch a wild Wocket?… With a “whistle and a net”!
  172. Why did the Sneetch open a smoothie shop?… He wanted to serve “star-fruit” smoothies!
  173. Why did the Yink from “One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish” become a painter?… It loved creating “yink-credible” works of art!
  174. What did the Grinch say when his computer crashed?… “Looks like it’s time for a Whovian-re-boot-i-on!
  175. Why did the Wickersham Brothers become musicians?… Their drum solos were “monkey-mazing!
  176. Don’t trust the Yertle the Turtle… he’s always trying to shell out a bad deal.