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More Thanksgiving Jokes…

  1. Knock, knock… Who’s there?… Gladys… Gladys who?…. Gladys Thanksgiving. Aren’t you? (Thanksgiving Knock Knock Jokes)
  2. If April showers bring May flowers, what do Mayflowers bring?… Pilgrims (The Mayflower Ship) (Spring Jokes)
  3. What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to?…Plymouth Rock! (Music Jokes)
  4. What’s the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?… The turkey trot! (Turkey Jokes)
  5. I wasn’t going to visit my family this November, but my mom promised to make me Eggs Benedict. So I’m going home for the hollandaise. (Egg Jokes & Thanksgiving Jokes)
  6. If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?… Their AGE! (Grandparents Jokes)
  7. My family told me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes … … but I told them I couldn’t quit “cold turkey.”
  8. Sister: Mom wants you to help us fix Thanksgiving dinner. Brother: Why? Is it broken?
  9. A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store for Thanksgiving Day, but couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?”  “No, ma’am. They’re dead.” (Turkey Jokes)
  10. A man buys a parrot, only to have it constantly insult him. He tries everything to make the parrot stop, but nothing works. Frustrated, the man puts the parrot in the freezer. After a few minutes the insults stop. The man thinks he might have killed the parrot, so he opens the freezer and takes the parrot out. The parrot is shivering. It stammers, “S-s-sorry for being r-r-rude. Please f-f-forgive me.” Then, after a moment, the parrot softly asks, “W-w-what exactly d-d-did the turkey do?”
  11. What smells the best at a Thanksgiving dinner?… Your nose. (Biology Jokes)
  12. What’s the best song to sing when preparing your turkey?… “All About That Baste.” (Music Jokes)
  13. What band is great to listen to on Thanksgiving?… The Cranberries! (Music Jokes)
  14. What kind of tan did pilgrims get at the beach?… Puritan. (Summer Jokes & Pilgrim Jokes)
  15. What did one cranberry say to another at Thanksgiving?… Tis the season to be jelly!
  16. Which November Holiday is Dracula’s favorite?… Fangs-giving! (Halloween Jokes & November Jokes)
  17. Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive?… It had 24 carrots. (Farming Jokes)
  18. What do you wear to Thanksgiving dinner?… A Har- VEST. (Fall Jokes)
  19. What’s the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?… The turKEY (Turkey Jokes)
  20. What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving?…The letter “g”! (26 Lessons for the Letter of the Week A- ZIs Spelling Really Important?)
  21. Why do pilgrims pants keep falling down?… Because their belt buckles are on their hats!
  22. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Norma Lee… Norma Lee who?… Norma Lee I don’t eat this much! (Thanksgiving Knock Knock Jokes)
  23. Who is not hungry at Thanksgiving?… The turkey because he’s already stuffed! (Turkey Jokes)
  24. Why did the farmer run a steamroller over his potato field on Thanksgiving Day?… He wanted to make mashed potatoes. (Farming Jokes)
  25. What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?… Pumpkin pi. (Pi Day Jokes & Pumpkin Jokes)
  26. How did the Mayflower show that it liked America?… It hugged the shore! (Geography Jokes)
  27. What key has legs and can’t open doors?… A turkey. (Turkey Jokes)
  28. What’s the most musical part of a turkey?… The drumstick! (Turkey Jokes & Music Jokes)
  29. Why did the police arrest the turkey?… They suspected it of fowl play! (Turkey Jokes & Police Jokes)
  30. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Tamara… Tamara who?… Tamara we’ll have turkey leftovers! (Turkey Jokes & Thanksgiving Knock Knock Jokes)
  31. What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son?… If your grandpa could see you now, he’d turn over in his gravy! (Turkey Jokes Grandparents Jokes / Cemetery Jokes)
  32. What kind of face does a pilgrim make when he’s in pain?… Pil-grimace. (Pilgrim Jokes)
  33. What do you call a pilgrim’s vocabulary?… Pilgrammar. (Pilgrim Jokes & Grammar Jokes)
  34. What is a turkey’s favorite dessert?… Peach gobbler! (Turkey Jokes Dessert Jokes / Georgia Jokes)
  35. Knock Knock… Who’s there?… Arthur… Arthur who?… Arthur any leftovers?
  36. What sound does a turkey’s phone make?… Wing! Wing! (Turkey Jokes)
  37. What sound does a limping turkey make?…“Wobble, wobble!” (Turkey Jokes)
  38. What happened when the turkey got into a fight?… He got the stuffing knocked out of him! (Turkey Jokes & Boxing Jokes)
  39. When the Pilgrims landed, where did they stand?… On their feet! (Geography Jokes)
  40. What do you call the age of a pilgrim?… Pilgrimage. (Pilgrim Jokes)
  41. What do you call it when it rains turkeys?… Foul weather! (Turkey Jokes & Rain Jokes)
  42. “A new survey found that 80% of men claim they help cook Thanksgiving dinner. Which makes sense, when you hear they consider saying ‘that smells good’ to be helping.” Jimmy Fallon
  43. Why did the Pilgrims want to sail to America in the spring? … Because April showers bring Mayflowers! (Spring Jokes)
  44. Why didn’t the pilgrim want to make the bread?… It’s a crummy job. (Pilgrim Jokes)
  45. Mom, can I have a canary for Thanksgiving?… NO! You’ll have turkey like everyone else. (Turkey Jokes & Bird Jokes)
  46. Where do you find a turkey with no legs?… Exactly where you left it! (Turkey Jokes)
  47. If fruit comes from a fruit tree, where does turkey come from?… A poul-tree! (Turkey Jokes & Tree Jokes)
  48. What did the turkey say to the computer?…“Google, google, google.” (Turkey Jokes & Computer Jokes)
  49. Why did the turkey cross the road?… It was Thanksgiving Day, and he wanted people to think he was a chicken! (Turkey Jokes)
  50. In what country is Thanksgiving ironically not celebrated?… Turkey. (World Geography Jokes & Turkey Jokes)
  51. Why did the farmer run a steamroller over his potato field on Thanksgiving Day?… He wanted to raise mashed potatoes. (Farming Jokes)
  52. If your great-grandmother saw you making boxed mashed potatoes … she would turn over in her gravy. (Grandparent Jokes Farming Jokes / Cemetery Jokes)
  53. If the pilgrims came on the Mayflower then what does the teacher come on?… The scholar ships. (Teacher Jokes & Pilgrim Jokes)
  54. What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?… “If your father could see you now, he’d turn over in his gravy!” (Turkey Jokes)
  55. What do you call a running turkey?… Fast food! (Fast Food Jokes)
  56. Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk?… To hatchet. (Turkey Jokes & Easter Jokes)
  57. Why can’t you take a turkey to church?… Because they use such FOWL language. (Turkey Jokes)
  58. “Thanksgiving, man. Not a good day to be my pants.” Kevin James
  59. Why didn’t the cook season the Thanksgiving turkey?… There was no thyme!
  60. Which bird is best at bowling?… turkey. (Bowling Jokes)
  61. Thanksgiving dinners take 18 hours to prepare. They are consumed in 12 minutes. Half-times take 12 minutes. This is not coincidence. Erma Bombeck
  62. Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?…Yes – a building can’t jump at all. (Top State Jokes & Turkey Jokes)
  63. What’s the difference between a pirate and a cranberry farmer?… A pirate buries his treasure, but a cranberry farmer treasures his berries. (Pirate Jokes)
  64. What sound does a space turkey make?… Hubble, Hubble, Hubble. (Turkey Jokes & Astronomy Jokes)
  65. Why did they let the turkey join the band?… Because he had the drumsticks. (Turkey Jokes & Music Jokes)
  66. What does Thanksgiving have in common with Halloween?… Gobble-ins! (Halloween Jokes)
  67. Which holiday is Dracula’s favorite?… Fangs-giving. (Vampire Jokes & Halloween Jokes)
  68. What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Day?… “Quack! Quack!” (Turkey Jokes & Hunting Jokes)
  69. Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel Prize?… Because he was out standing in his field! (Scarecrow Jokes & Farming Jokes)
  70. What does an English turkey say to another English turkey on Thanksgiving morning?… To be or not to be roasted, that is the question. (Turkey Jokes & Grammar Jokes)
  71. What happened to the Pilgrim who was shot at by an Indian?… He had an arrow escape! (Pilgrim Jokes & Archery Jokes)
  72. What’s Frankenstein’s favorite Thanksgiving dish?… Monster mash potatoes and grave-y. (Halloween Jokes & Farming Jokes)
  73. Stop, drop, and… pass the rolls! (Bread Jokes)
  74. What are unhappy cranberries called?… Blueberries! (Psychology Jokes)
  75. Why do turkeys eat so little?… Because they are always stuffed.
  76. Knock knock… Who’s there?… Don… Don who?… Don eat all the gravy, I want some more. (Thanksgiving Knock Knock Jokes)
  77. What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport?… Squash (Squash Jokes & Fall Jokes)
  78. What part of the turkey does a drummer love the most?… The drumsticks. (Music Jokes)
  79. What side dish do you bring for Thanksgiving dinner when you accidentally sat on the sweet potatoes?… Squash casserole.
  80. What role do green beans play in Thanksgiving dinner?… The casse-role.
  81. What animal has the worst eating habits?… The turkey, because it gobbles everything up!
  82. What is a scarecrow’s favorite fruit?… Straw-berries! (Scarecrow Jokes & Farming Jokes)
  83. Why did the farmer have to separate the chicken and the turkey?… He sensed fowl play. (Turkey Jokes & Farming Jokes)
  84. Thanksgiving. It’s like we didn’t even try to come up with a tradition. The tradition is, we overeat. ‘Hey, how about at Thanksgiving we just eat a lot?’ ‘But we do that every day!’ ‘Oh. What if we eat a lot with people that annoy the hell out of us?’ Jim Gaffigan
  85. What do you call a stuffed animal?… You after thanksgiving.
  86. Why do turkeys always go, “gobble, gobble?”… Because they never learned good table manners! (Turkey Jokes)
  87. What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an evil spirit?… A poultrygeist! (Halloween Jokes& Turkey Jokes)
  88. Why did the cranberries turn red?… Because they saw the turkey dressing! (Turkey Jokes)
  89. What side dish do you bring for Thanksgiving dinner when you accidentally sat on the sweet potatoes?… Squash casserole. (Farming Jokes)
  90. What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo?… A turkey that can pluck itself! (Turkey Jokes & Music Jokes)
  91. What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?… Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving. (Turkey Jokes)
  92. What do a Thanksgiving and a Halloween have in common?… One has gobblers, the other goblins. (Halloween Jokes)
  93. Why did they let the turkey join the band?… Because he had his own drumsticks. (Music Jokes)
  94. Wife: I was going to serve sweet potatoes with Thanksgiving dinner, but I sat on them. Husband: What are you serving now?… Squash. (Farming Jokes)
  95. What do modern day Native Americans call a pilgrim?… Pil-grim Reaper. (Pilgrim Jokes / Cemetery Jokes / Halloween Jokes)
  96. If you call a large turkey a gobbler what do you call a small one?… Goblet. (Turkey Jokes)
  97. What’s the best way to stuff a turkey?… Serve him lots of pizza and ice cream. (Turkey Jokes/ Ice Cream Jokes / Pizza Jokes)
  98. What did the turkey say before it was roasted?… Boy! I’m stuffed! (Turkey Jokes)
  99. What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day?… God save the kin. (Turkey Jokes & Music Jokes)
  100. Why should you never set the turkey next to the dessert?… Because he will gobble, gobble it up! (Dessert Jokes)
  101. What did baby corn say to mama corn?… Where’s popcorn? (Popcorn Jokes & Father’s Day Jokes)
  102. Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?…The outside! (Turkey Jokes)
  103. Knock knock!… Who’s there?… Annie… Annie who?… Annie body seen the turkey? (Thanksgiving Knock Knock Jokes)
  104. Knock knock!… Who’s there?… Arthur… Arthur who?… Arthur any leftovers? (Thanksgiving Knock Knock Jokes)
  105. What was the turkey suspected of?… Fowl play. (Turkey Jokes & Police Jokes)
  106. Which cat discovered America?… Christofurry Columbus (Columbus Day Jokes & Cat Jokes)
  107. What are the feathers on a turkey’s wings called?… Turkey feathers. (Turkey Jokes)
  108. What would be good about crossing a turkey with an octopus?… Everyone would get a drumstick on Thanksgiving. (Octopus Jokes)
  109. Why did the Pilgrims eat turkey at Thanksgiving?… Because they couldn’t fit the moose in the oven! (Turkey Jokes & Pilgrim Jokes)  (Thanksgiving Jokes)
  110. What did the turkey say to the man who tried to shoot it?… Liberty, Equality and Bad aim for all. (Thanksgiving Jokes / American Revolution Jokes / Hunting Jokes / Turkey Jokes)
  111. What do you get when you cross a turkey with a centipede?… Drumsticks for everyone on Thanksgiving Day!